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The Washington Nationals Are Shutting Down Stephen Strasburg A Little Earlier Than Expected
They are flipping the switch as we speak. Strasburg is 15-6 with a 3.14 ERA, and will finish with those numbers. Strasburg was hit pretty solidly by the Marlins last night (the Nationals lost 9-7 in 10 innings), and today, manager Davey Johnson told the media it would be Strasburg's final start of ...

How To Eat A Popeye's Biscuit: A Guide For People Seeking The Harmony Of The Universe
Consider the Popeye's biscuit....

Deadspin's College Football Top 25 Or So: Scoreboard!
It's time for a new installment of Deadspin's college football rankings. As always, the teams are ranked according to the logic and values of college football, no matter how bizarre or contradictory they may be....

Roger Goodell Is Not As All-Powerful As He Thinks He Is
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"People Were Having Sex In The Penalty Box," And Other Shitshow Details From The Report On The BU Ice Hockey Team
The task force report released earlier this week about the Boston University ice hockey team's "culture of sexual entitlement" withheld the finding's explicit details from the public. The Boston Globe has obtained those details, which were based on testimonials from players, students, and others, an...

Paul Thomas Anderson: Waiting For <em>The Master</em>
In late July, the Weinstein Company announced it would be releasing The Master, Paul Thomas Anderson's new movie, on September 14, which is early for an Oscar candidate. Most Best Picture nominees come out no sooner than October so that they're as fresh as possible in voters' minds. Nonetheless, the...

The Why Your Team Sucks Butthurt Awards
“Butthurt” is an awful word. Its origins are almost certainly tied to the “Bros icing bros” movement of aught-ten, as in, “Aw bro! You’re just BUTTHURT because I iced you while Tina was givin’ you a Jeff Smoker, bro!” We at Deadspin generally go out of our way to avoid using it, because it’s a short...

It's Women's Semis Day At The U.S. Open. Let's Watch It Together
Every year, the Friday after Labor Day provides a pretty awesome respite: Two women's U.S. Open semifinals, played in the middle of the afternoon. It helps shorten the already short week. First up: French Open champ Maria Sharapova against Aussie Open champ Victoria Azarenka. Then we've got Serena W...

"They Won't Magically Turn You Into A Lustful Cockmonster": Chris Kluwe Explains Gay Marriage To The Politician Who Is Offended By An NFL Player Supporting It
Baltimore Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo has spoken out in favor of a Maryland ballot initiative that would legalize gay marriage. Yahoo has published a letter that Maryland state delegate Emmett C. Burns Jr. wrote last week to Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti, urging him to "inhibit such expressi...

Ask Black Crowes Drummer (And Nashville Sports-Talk Radio Host) Steve Gorman About Being A Rock Star And Stuff
Steve Gorman is a founding member of the Black Crowes, and he remains their drummer. He's also an avid sports fan, and since January he's hosted his own afternoon weekday program on Nashville radio station 102.5 The Game. Gorman, who says the Black Crowes are still together even though they haven't ...

The USTA Told This Stellar Junior Player She Was Too Fat For The U.S. Open
Taylor Townsend is a 16-year-old tennis phenom. She's the No. 1 ranked girls junior and won the Australian Open juniors tournament earlier this year....

Are You Ready For Many, Many More Years Of Chris Berman? ESPN Is.
Two months ago, there was buzz in Bristol that Chris Berman was on the verge of re-signing a big contract. Bristolites were surprised. First, his contract wasn't set to expire till May 2013, so why do anything 10 months before? Especially since ESPN let plenty of prominent contracts go down to the w...

Lions Fan Named Shawn Payton Sentenced For Calling In Superdome Bomb Threats During Playoffs
Back in January, Detroit's return to the playoffs was a bit of a thud, getting blown out in the second half by the once-and-future dome offense in New Orleans. But it wasn't for lack of trying, especially on the part of Shawn Payton, from Jackson, Mich. Payton was watching the game at home, and he d...

NBC Broke Even On The London Olympics, So Get Ready For More Tape Delays And Crappy Online Streaming
The lasting legacy of these recent London Olympics wasn't Ryan Lochte's epic bro-ness or McKayla Maroney's perpetual disinterest in everything, but rather it was #NBCfail, the hashtag that, over the course of 17 days, came to signify the complete ineptness of a media conglomerate to please its wider...

The Nationals And Cubs Need To Work On Their Bench-Clearing Brawl Technique
#NATITUDE was on full display tonight at Nationals Park as an inside pitch to Bryce Harper, preceded by some jawing between Nationals third base coach Bo Porter and Cubs bench coach Jamie Quirk, led to perhaps the most anticlimactic bench-clearing brawl in baseball history. Lots of pushing, some ye...

Mike Rizzo Says You People With Opinions On Stephen Strasburg Only Know 10 Percent Of The Story
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Leave the shutdown decisions to the experts....

Colorado School District Says Peyton Manning Is A Gang Sign
If you're a student in the Greeley-Evans (Colo.) School District and you want to wear your brand-new Peyton Manning jersey to school, you might be gang-curious, according to the people who run your schools....

Like A Meaner, Braver, Less Funny <em>Bridesmaids</em>. <em>Bachelorette</em>, Reviewed.
1. In retrospect, the "surprising" success of Bridesmaids should have been the furthest thing from a surprise. It was a big, broad, audience-friendly comedy that made sure, in between all the poop jokes and the rampant silliness, that you liked all of its characters. It was ribald and bawdy, but nev...

Art Modell, 1925-2012: Grifter, Traitor, Model NFL Owner
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When High School Football Meets The Campaign Trail, The Results Are A Lot More Awesome Than You'd Expect
We're well into high school football season, which means you've probably been exposed to your local newspaper's special edition highlighting the region's top teams and star players....