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<i>Chicago Sun-Times</i> Columnist Joe Cowley Rides A Plane, Degrades Women Everywhere
Ever since Jay Marrioti fell off the face of the planet, the Chicago Sun-Times has been a little light in the abusive-toward-females department. This morning, Joe Cowley (pictured, far right) bravely stepped in to assume the role, in an albeit verbal, yet no less demeaning manner when he took on on...
Today In Free Kicks: Kyle Walker, Young-Pyo Lee Produced Two Of The Most Gorgeous Goals You'll Ever See
The past 20 hours have been outstanding for fans of set pieces, as two beautiful free kick goals found the net and proved decisive in their respective games. Spurs back Kyle Walker secured victory for his squad in their match this morning against Blackburn with the above strike, a curving weasel o...
Bryce Harper Has His First Major League Hit, Possibly Because Dodgers Fans Were Mooning Their Own Pitcher
Nationals rookie Bryce Harper doubled in his third MLB at-bat, giving him his first hit in the majors. More importantly, though, it happened as some fans behind home plate had their bare asses out and pointing toward the mound. Why? I don't know. Does it matter? No. [PRIME]...
Bryce Harper's First Major League At-Bat Was A Comebacker
He's clearly doomed to failure....
LeBron James Has Ushered In The NBA Playoffs Flop Era
While debate continues to rage in regard to whether Tyson Chandler's screen on LeBron James today really accounted for a flagrant foul, there's no doubt that LeBron augmented the impact with his own brand of thespianism. The incident set Jeff Van Gundy off on another rant about flopping, and is a ...
Witness The Last Gasp Of Local News Reporting As It Repeatedly Hits On St. Louis Cardinal David Freese
Here is World Series MVP David Freese being subjected to quite possibly the most uncomfortably awkward fluff piece ever. Six Flags has a Mr. Freeze roller coaster and Show Me St. Louis' Julie Tristan decided it would be the perfect excuse to continually hit on the young Cardinal. She even brought i...
Michigan Costumed Vigilante Arrested Following Trailer Park Brawl
Where to begin? Let's start with the Michigan Protectors. The self proclaimed "costumed activists" work to set up neighborhood watches and are part of an online community known as "Real Life Super Heroes." Just so we're all on the same page though, these people do not have super powers, despite wha...
Tim McCarver Blames Global Warming For The Increase In Major League Home Runs
We'd normally save this sort of thing for McCarve'd Up (which will be back next week after being pre-empted for NFL draft coverage) but Tim McCarver said one of the stupidest things ever spoken on a television broadcast today, blaming global warming for "making the air thin" and thus leading to a...
Scott Hairston Hits For Cycle, Mets Get Clobbered
Scott Hairston did that cool and meaningless thing where a player gets all the different kinds of hits possible in one game. Sadly, it was not a "natural" cycle, an even more meaningless occurrence made remarkable by the order in which the hits are made. The Mets, on the other hand, did that uncool...
Here's Umpire Jeff Kellogg Tackling A Streaker At Tonight's A's-Orioles Game [UPDATE]
Jeff Kellogg was behind the plate for tonight's A's-Orioles game, when during the Seventh Inning Stretch a shirtless fan came onto the field and (painfully, we imagine) slid headfirst into home plate....
Dead Letters: "Stop Lying And Write Something Real"
Subject: baseball baby...
Joel Ward Doesn't Blame Boston For Racist Comments
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Nobody should be blaming an entire city or fanbase....
Feeling Goodell: Who Hugged The NFL Commissioner Longest At Last Night's Draft?
NFL commissioner and disciplinary hardass Roger Goodell has ushered in the Draft Day Hug Era, eschewing the usual handshake photo-ops in favor of giving in to those players who want to give him the bro treatment. Goodell has embraced the embrace to such an extent that it's become the norm. Every pl...
Fun With 69ing Failures
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Better Know An Umpire: Lance Barrett
Welcome to Better Know An Umpire, an effort to educate ourselves on the human elements who have ultimate decision-making power over some 2,500 Major League Baseball games a year. (All cumulative statistics are through the 2011 season, unless otherwise stated.)...
Rajon Rondo, Magnificent Weirdo, Makes Every Tip-Off A Show
Thank you, anonymous YouTube user and presumed Celtics fan (Update: This guy!) who a) noticed that Rajon Rondo adds a stylish little tweak when he corrals the opening tip of every game, and b) put together a video compilation of some of this season's best. It's the showmanship of the pre-game rout...
John Cusack In A Goatee? Quoth The Raven: Meh.
John Cusack is one of those actors whom everybody likes. He was a consistently enjoyable presence in '80s films like Better Off Dead and Sixteen Candles, and he won the hearts of a generation of young women by being the most sensitive man ever in Say Anything. Since then, he's been an indie staple (...
Morris Claiborne Is The Smartest Rookie In The NFL
When word leaked that LSU cornerback Morris Claiborne scored a four on his Wonderlic, our measured reaction was "who gives a shit?" It's a test of certain cognitive abilities, and gives a result that offers no prediction of future performance. Claiborne has a distinction that's a hell of a lot more ...
And Here's The Long-Awaited Unveiling Of Robert Griffin III's Socks
"Go catch your dreams," says RG3, though to his receivers "your dreams" means "my passes."(Click "Expand" for a closer look.)...
Texas Couple Finds Foul Ball-Snatching Charges "Hurtful," Demands Apology From Michael Kay
When Sean Leonard and his fiancée, Shannon Moore, attended their first Texas Rangers game last night, they had no idea they would soon create national news for denying to give a foul ball to—and then taunting—a crying boy sitting next to them. Since them, they've been deemed the "worst people ev...