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Stop Whatever You're Doing, And Watch This Sad Drunk Lady Cry About The Packers Loss
I can't. I can't even do this. Thank you Giants, and thank you Internet, and thank you Megan for being a better cameraperson than friend....

In Honor Of His 70th Birthday, Here's Muhammad Ali Riding A Horse
Photographer and filmmaker Anton Perich snapped this photo in Deer Lake, Pa., in 1974. He likened it to an image of St. George slaying dragons he had seen as a youth in his native Croatia: "It was a majestic moment, when reality meets mythology." The above image is one of 70 photos and tributes Tim...

Marshall Coach Tom Herrion Flops On Sideline To Draw A Foul, Helps Seal Win Over UCF
Marshall head coach Tom Herrion appeared to have survived "The Big One" toward the end of the second half against UCF on Saturday, when he was allegedly elbowed by Knights guard Isaiah Sykes and collapsed in pain. Repeatedly. And rather dramatically. ...

"Donkey Punch" Made Its Way Onto <em>Jeopardy!</em> Tonight
Several readers have already emailed to alert us to this, and we just had to share it with you. Even Alex Trebek sounds like he's smirking a little. Way to take a swing, Mike....

The View From The Wrong Side Of An NFL Instant Classic
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Turns Out That African Fellow Running A Gold-For-Sale Scam Was Dikembe Mutombo
WHO WANTS TO SEX BUY $10 MILLION WORTH OF CONFLICT MINERALS FROM MUTOMBO?...

Chandler Parsons Just Dunked On JaVale McGee
Sure, it's a tip-slam, but if you're 7'0" JaVale McGee then the likes of Chandler Parsons should not be dunking on you—under any circumstances. Parsons then rides around with his crotch in McGee's face for a few seconds just added to the degradation, but these sorts of things are how a team like ...

Holy Balls Serena Williams Is Ripped: Deadspin's Australian Open Preview
While Americans were freezing their Tebows off watching playoff football, the first major tennis tournament of the year kicked off in Australia, with temperatures in Melbourne hitting 92 on day one. Dylan Stableford, Deadspin's tennis editor, has a preview of the action Down Under....

Four Theories On How The Giants Went From Awful To Amazing
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Joe Paterno Wants Us To Believe He Has Never Heard Of "Rape And A Man." Joe Paterno Is Full Of Shit.
Sally Jenkins of the Washington Post scored a precious exclusive interview with Joe Paterno last week and summarily pissed away the opportunity by deploying every tired Paterno cliche that gives Joe Posnanski an erection. He's lived in the same house for dickety-two years! He turned down the Pats be...

Why, Oh Why, Did The Packers Have To Lose?
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Washington State Head Coach Ken Bone Eats It On The Court
Halfway through the second half of the hotly contested battle for the state of Washington, Wazoo head coach Ken Bone is just a tad too exuberant with his request for a timeout. I hope, for his sake, he was able to pick up the spare. [FSN] ...
![NSFW: An Alabama Fan Teabagged A Passed-Out LSU Fan At The Bourbon Street Krystal [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
NSFW: An Alabama Fan Teabagged A Passed-Out LSU Fan At The Bourbon Street Krystal [UPDATE]
Those of us un/fortunate enough to have visited the Krystal restaurant at the mouth of Bourbon Street in New Orleans know it's a place where the occasionally odd, bizarre, or criminal events take place. We don't know which of these this incident is, if not all three. That's especially given that so...

Bernie Fine Accuser Admits To Fabricating Sexual Abuse Claims
In letters (provided below) obtained by the Post-Standard, Floyd VanHooser, the prison inmate who accused Bernie Fine of sexually abusing him since 1969, has admitted to fabricating his story. ...

Your NFL Playoffs Divisional Round Open Thread: Houston Texans at Baltimore Ravens
Welcome back for day two of the divisional round. As always, make yourselves comfortable down below in the comments....

Edson Barboza's <em>Roadhouse</em>-Style Face-Kick Knockout Is Even Better When Slowed Down 500%
We didn't have time to give this nasty wheel kick KO the proper treatment last night, but here's Edson Barboza's heel applied to Terry Etim's face in extreme slow motion, from Saturday's UFC 142 lightweight event....

Dwarf Tossing Is All Fun And Games Until Someone Loses The Ability To Walk Unassisted
Martin Henderson, a 37 year-old British man who suffers from dwarfism, was out celebrating his birthday and watching the Rugby World Cup when he was suddenly, and violently tossed by a "hooded thug" while trying to enjoy a smoke outside of the White Horse Pub in Wincanton, Somerset....

Tim Tebow Losing Is Why We Love Sports
Your morning roundup for Jan. 15, the day we learned old drawings of space are actually pretty awesome. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Tom Brady's Punt Finally Brought Some Life To The Broncos Defense, If By Life You Mean Punches
Blame Von Miller for this dirty hit that is an unfortunate coda to his otherwise spectacular season. But quick kicks always tend to result in some kind of craziness; like turnovers, they put players outside their comfort zone. In this case, it was reason for Miller to go on an assault mission, th...

Edson Barboza Brutally Knocked Out Terry Etim With A Kick To The Face
While the New England Patriots are metaphorically kicking the crap out of the Denver Broncos, this knock-out wheel kick from Edson Barboza provides legitimate reason to check Terry Etim's pants. It was a blow that might ruin the adjective "lightweight" forever....