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Rajon Rondo Won't Shoot If You Pay Him
Via TBJ, Rajon Rondo pulls up on the breakaway rather than attempt the risky (for him) uncontested layup. Rondo finished the night shooting 2-12, which brought his season percentage down, but not by much....

The Florida Basketball Team Has No Comment On Premarital Sex
A reporter for the Orlando Sentinel attended the Florida Gators' press conference yesterday to ask Billy Donovan and Chandler Parsons about premarital sex, and then he wrote nearly 800 words about how the BYU honor code "lifted college athletics up." Donovan passed on the question — "How hard woul...

NBA Scouts Agree: Jimmer Fredette Is Very, Very White
The best part about yesterday's foreseeable New York Times story on Jimmer Fredette wasn't the obvious notion that Fredette might make for a less-than-dominant NBA player. Far better and more obvious was the list of less-than-dominant NBA players that several front-office types used to assess Fredet...

Rodney Stuckey Is The Latest To Embarrass Chris Bosh
Since Miami beat Detroit last night, 100-94, and since the Heat (49-22) are already in the playoffs while the Pistons (25-46) decidedly are not, all we can really say about this game is that Chris Bosh still found a way to make it embarrassing for the guys in red. Here's Rodney Stuckey, the doll o...

Identity Of The Lady Who Bared Her Rump For All To See In The Seventies Is Finally Exposed
Your morning roundup for March 24, the day an 8.5-point underdog taps into its inner Jersey Shore, all Socs-versus-Greasers style....

We Are All Dave McKenna XLVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit behaves like foot fungus doused with tough actin' Tinactin....

<em>Around The Horn</em> Takes On The March Madness Selection Process
This is a clip from an Around The Horn episode about a week ago, in which the four journalists du jour took on the March Madness selection process — a topic that seemed to be on everybody's mind. "How much difference between the innies and the outies?" wondered show host Tony Reali. "What do you t...

It’d Take Trey Parker A Million Years To Lose, And Other Statistical Oddities Of <em>BASEketball</em>
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today: The offensivel...

The Dave Duerson Autopsy Report Is Predictably Heartbreaking
The Miami-Dade County medical examiner has released her final report on the death of former NFLer Dave Duerson, who shot himself through the heart last month and instructed that his brain be donated to head trauma research. Confirmed by the report is that Duerson complained of "memory loss and inabi...

Derrick Rose Made This Young Hawks Fan Cry
Your morning roundup for March 22 23, the day Glenn Beck contemplated launching his own channel, and we all contemplated launching ourselves off bridges....

Here's JaVale McGee's Pretty Nuts Mid-Air Steal-Block
So what if JaVale McGee authored the second-worst triple-double ever last week, while on the wrong side of a blowout? He still had 12 blocks!...

We Are All Dave McKenna XLVII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit crawls into its death cave and lies down....

Tiger Woods Is Screwing Again, Everybody Run
Tiger Woods is at Bay Hill this week and one restless journalist there will ask about the reports that Tiger is now boning an IMG exec's stepdaughter. Maybe two. But if that happens, playful Tiger on Jimmy Fallon reverts back to scowling Tiger and then every writer there will have to work much hard...

Goalkeeper Misses The Ball, Knees Opposing Player Directly In The Face
In Ukranian professional soccer action on Sunday, Volyn keeper Vitaliy Nedilko tried to collect a loose ball and instead collided directly with Luiz Adriano's face. To those who say soccer isn't a contact sport: it is when player's noses are crushed inside their faces, okay? Adriano's squad, Shakh...

Who Wants To See What The Chinese Dunk Contest Looks Like?
You know you were curious....

Ray Allen, Carmelo Anthony Go Down Bloodied; Big Baby Davis Just Pretends
In a chippy game, Ray Allen needed seven stitches after an elbow from Jared Jeffries, and Carmelo Anthony got five of his own after running into Rajon Rondo. Glen Davis? He just wanted someone to kiss his boo-boo like the better players, so he flopped after a phantom elbow....

Alley-Oop To Derrick Rose Is Special
The Bulls keep winning — they beat Sacramento by 40 points last night in Chicago — and have earned the franchise's first 50-win season since the 1998 title year. They've been so good not only because their point guard is Derrick Rose, a candidate for the league MVP, but also because their team che...

We Are All Dave McKenna XLVI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Padma tells Snyder's dumbass libel suit to pack its knives and go. Today's topic: Dan's weekend in the Big Easy....

This Woman Crashed A Car With 54 Bags Of Heroin In Her Vagina
Karin Mackaliunas of Scranton, Pennsylvania could be a character on The Office — if they had a character who stuffs 54 bags of heroin, cash, empty bags, and pills in her vagina and then crashes a car. Bloated much?… [Jalopnik] ...

We Are All Dave McKenna XLV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit is judicially spat upon. Today's topic: Looming scandals....