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The Time Zito Gave Mulder A Handjob, And Other Tales From The World Of Baseball Slash Fiction
Some lucky folks have especially vivid imaginations. But the rest of us need the internet to find Jaret Wright tenderly licking Melky Cabrera, or Kyle Farnsworth and Vance Wilson in bed together with knives....

Everyone's Talking About Harry Baals
The Fort Wayne city government is renaming its government center, and its residents have demonstrated an overwhelming preference to honor former mayor Harry Baals (now pronounced bales). This is making for some excellent TV news reports, all compiled above....

We Are All Dave McKenna VIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets a proper defenestration. Today's topic: Dan Snyder is a self-defeatingly petulant shit....

From Bleacher Report To ProFootballTalk: A Brett Favre Non-Rumor Goes National
We've gotten the emails too: "Bret Favre to join Dancing With The Stars?" We ignored them until PFT posted the rumors early this morning. As fascinating as that would be, the tale of how the rumor made it this far is an even better story....

Ray Allen Humbly Breaks The NBA's 3-Point Record
Last night, Ray Allen made the 2,561st three-pointer of his professional career in a 92-86 loss to the Lakers and gave Reggie Miller a hug. He did this, as he reportedly does everything else in his life, quite humbly. Even if it is true that all 2,562 of those three-pointers (he knocked down another...

Tiger Woods Is Having A Great Time In Dubai
Your morning roundup for Feb. 11, the day the White House has to play whatever cards they have left…...

Dan Snyder Is So Awful People Will Pay For Vanity License Plates To Insult Him
For when a bumper sticker is not enough, the people of The District have found a new venue to publicly display their shared hatred for everyone's favorite petulant shit, Dan Snyder. Does Dave McKenna drive a Jeep?...

Kobe Bryant Sees Laker Fans Everywhere — Even In Boston
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: why Kobe doesn't get hassled in the Hub....

No, A Coach Donating His Kidney To A Player Isn't An NCAA Violation; Yes, They Had To Make Sure First
Wake Forest baseball coach Tom Walter donating one of his own kidneys to freshman player Kevin Jordan is one of the best stories we've heard in a long time. So we're not sure if it speaks more to our cynicism or the labyrinthine bylaws of the NCAA that we honestly wondered: does this violate anythin...

HS Baseball Coach Cuts Double-Amputee Pitcher; Quickly Becomes Worst Human Ever
This young man is Anthony Burruto, a sophomore at Dr. Phillips High School in Orlando and an aspiring pitcher. Burruto was born without a shinbone in his left leg and without a fibula in his right, and doctors amputated his lower legs when he was just a baby. He's been playing baseball since he was ...

We Are All Dave McKenna VII
Have you read Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder" yet? You should. We'll be linking to it every day until Snyder's dumbass libel suit is thrown to the dogs. Today's topics: Dan Snyder — petulant shit, rough talker, lapsed free-speech warrior....

Yes, The Cavaliers Are Favored To Win Tonight
Lost in all the foofaraw over the Cavs' 25-game losing streak is the fact that, hey, there are some other terrible teams in the NBA. Like the Pistons! With a 6-21 road record, and probably without the services of Rip Hamilton, they're actually the underdogs going into tonight's game at the Q. For dr...

"Dear Pathetic, Ignorant Twats": The Duke/UNC War Of Words Heats Up
It's an annual tradition for the editors of the Duke Chronicle and the Daily Tar Heel to exchange trash talk letters in advance of their schools' first matchup of the season. We got them both, and boy, do the young minds of Tobacco Road have a way with words....

We Are All Dave McKenna VI
This is Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we will be linking daily until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets tossed into the Potomac. Today's topics: the Redskins' top PR guy covering himself in stupid, and Dan Snyder being a petulant shit....

Real American Fans Shut Out Of Real American Event Do Real American Thing And Sue
Somehow two silly displaced Super Bowl ticketholders and their eager lawyers managed to devise a lawsuit just as profoundly stupid as Dan Snyder's. They're seeking more than $5 million from the NFL, the Cowboys, and Jerry Jones personally. Why?...

The Man In The Orange Suit Could Not Believe His Eyes
Your morning roundup for Feb. 9, the day we realized we'd developed a dangerous addiction to Hint Of Lime Tostito chips....

We Are All Dave McKenna V
Presenting, once again, Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we will be linking daily until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets laughed out of court. Today's topics: Baja Fresh, propaganda, and Dan Snyder being a petulant shit....

Guns N' Peas Is Where The Trajectory Of Man Began Its Steady Decline
So the Black Eyed Peas covered "Sweet Child O Mine" at the Super Bowl last night, with Slash helping out on guitar. First of all, FUCK YOU SLASH. You just spent the last bit of goodwill you earned from NOT being Axl. Secondly, the journey to our eventual self-extinction has begun....

We Are All Dave McKenna IV
Here, once again, is Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we will be linking daily until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets tossed. Today's topics: vanilla ice cream, literalized metaphors, and Dan Snyder being a petulant shit....
