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Sweet Lincoln's Mullet! The Sarah Palin Sportscast Video Is Here
Sorry to barge in on your holiday weekend — for God's sake, put on some pants — but I just got back from he movies and found this great video in a basket on my doorstep. It's the one we've all been waiting for, a gift from the cold, desolate North: A sportscast featuring presumptive Republican Vice ...

It's Clemson. It's Alabama. It's A Live Blog, Sucka!
Here on the first college football Saturday of 2008, we've already seen the likes of Michigan, Virginia Tech, and Pittsburgh endure losses right out of the gate. And yet one more Top 25 team is guaranteed to wake up on Sunday morning with an 0-1 record. Will it be Clemson, led by the down-home Tomm...

Rudi Johnson Released From Bengals, Presumably For Good Behavior
You KNOW you're washed up when even the Bengals don't want you around anymore. Such is the case with Rudi Johnson, the tough Bengals running back whom you could pencil in for 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns each season. At least that was the case before the franchise ran him into the ground. Last seas...

Skip Holtz Will Eat Your Children In Broad Daylight
Playing the role of the disgruntled Asian kid was the East Carolina football program, who hosted Virginia Tech this afternoon and pillaged the game after the Pirates returned a blocked punt for a touchdown in the last two minutes to give Skip Holtz a 27-22 win over the Hokies and our first upset of...

LSU Now 2-0 Against Teams That Recently Beat Michigan
The LSU Tigers have just finished up their tilit with Appalachian State, and it wasn't as close as some people expected. The Mountaineers, who of course beat Michigan at Michigan to kick off 2007, were trounced by the defending BCS champions (who beat Ohio State in the BCS title game, who had beaten...

Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you get home via the awesome power of beer ... • Boxing: Champion Matt Godfrey vs. Emmanuel Nwodo, in Uncasville, Conn. (9 p.m., ET). Title Wave engulfs Mohegan Sun Arena. [ESPN2] • College football: Temple at Army (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN Classic]; Southern Methodist at Rice (8 p.m., ...

U.S. Open Update: Ivanovic Out, But Hot Girlfriend Boxes Intact
Dylan Stableford writes occasionally about tennis for Deadspin. It's called "Droppin' Deuce With Dylan Stableford." This week, he's at the U.S. Open, watching tennis and taking creepy pictures of Brooklyn Decker from afar. Heading into the first weekend of the Flushing fortnight, we've lost one sult...

College Football Kickoff Night: North Carolina State vs. South Carolina
Enough of your waiting, young stallion. The Pack of Wolves are visiting the Game of Cocks. To christen the season on TV, ESPN's Chris Fowler, Craig James and Jesse Palmer are behind the mic. Erin Andrews is behind the sidelines with a different mic — one that gets way more pageviews than a regular m...

Before The Live Blog: Pour Out A Little Splash From The Mini-Keg Tonight For ICCC President Robert Paxton
You may recall on Monday when I posted a DUAN! story about Iowa Central Community College president Robert Paxton's ridiculous boat party pictures that were published in the Des Moines Register. The photos caused quite a stir in sleepy central Iowa academia. Unfortunately, Paxton's contention that t...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after realizing that Chinese kids are destined never to learn English ... • College football: North Carolina State at South Carolina (8 p.m., ET) [ESPN]; Wake Forest at Baylor (8 p.m., ET) [FSN]; Oregon State at Stanford (9 p.m., ET). Beaver invasion! I'll see you there. [ESPN2] • MLB:...

Roger Ebert Gives Jay Mariotti A Strategically Placed Thumb On His Way Out The Door
If there are any more questions about Jay Mariotti's awfulness and how actively despised he is by most people at the Chicago Sun-Times, look no further than this internal letter being circulated around, oh, everywhere in Chicago's news rooms penned by Sun-Times movie critic Roger Ebert. The man sure...

Come Help The Jamestown Jammers Salute Slightly Flawed Things
If you can't make it out to see the New York Giants take on the New England Patriots in tonight's preseason game, why not do the next best thing?* The Jamestown Jammers minor league baseball team (Class A New York-Penn League) is holding its gala "Saltute to Imperfection Night" at Diethrick Park, wh...

Ten Yards Of Awkwardness With Chris Cooley
Drew Magary's Balls Deep column runs every Thursday afternoon. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," released October 27th and featuring 100% new material, is available for pre-order here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK. When we started KSK two years ago, I did a series of ph...

College Football Previews: #1 Georgia
At long last, we've reached the start of college football season and the end of our sojourn through the top 25. Thanks a ton to all our 25 writers for helping us get ready for the new season. Our final preview is brought to you by Doug Gillett of Hey Jenny Slater. Do enjoy. By the way, the above pi...

The Chicago Sun-Times Won't Even Attempt To Contain Its Excitement
Yesterday, as the whole Jay Mariotti saga unfurled, longtime commenter Pete "Jayhawk" Gaines (and current combudsman at vroom-vroom central, Jalopnik) amusingly passed along an email exchange he'd had with Sun-Times EIC Michael Cooke: Sir: I wish to inform you that due to recent developments on the ...

Nick Bakay Is Lame, Lou Holtz Needs Professional Help And The Mets Fight Back
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....

It's College Football Eve!
It’s College Football Eve and there’s a good chance some of the guys and girls you're working with are a bit giddy today. Jumpy in ways they aren’t ordinarily. It’s not the alcohol or drug withdrawal, it’s just because those of us who are college football fans can feel it in the pit of our stomachs...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch following video proof that Germany won the 100m freestyle ... • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees (7 p.m., ET). Paul Byrd vs. Sidney Ponson in the race to a 5.00 ERA. [ESPN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, men's first round and women's second round, at New York (7 p.m., ET). Ow! I pulled my Kuznets...

Save the Three Daves of JP/LF/Raycom...Please, God, No
There's a movement afoot, led by esteemed Southern football writer Tony Barnhart, to save the three Daves from the college football scrap heap in the wake of the new ESPN deal with the SEC. This is the rough equivalent of calling for the Berlin Wall to be rebuilt on the morning after it was torn do...