to Page 2043 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you enjoy your free lifetime's supply of beer ... • MLB: American League Championship Series, game 5, Boston at Cleveland. Manny is very sorry, and says he cares a great deal. [Fox] • College football: South Florida at Rutgers. The Oklahoma-Nebraska of the 21st century. [ESPN] • Col...

ESPN Anchors Feel The Burn
You know, we always imagined that Richard Simmons just hung out in Bristol all the time, sort of an unofficial mascot. We imagine him fetching Nachos for Van Pelt and really getting on Trey Wingo's nerves....

Torre Says Thanks, But No Thanks, To The Yankees
There's something perfect, really, about how this whole Joe Torre business went down. Now that he has rejected a one-year deal with the Yankees, he gets to walk away from the madness with his dignity intact and his head high. And the Yankees get to move on themselves. All this talk about firing Tor...

Jimmy Kimmel Doesn't See What All The Fuss Is About
After his appearance on "Monday Night Football" earlier this week, Jimmy Kimmel has been banned from the program. This is supposed to be a punishment?...

See, Now This Is Just Being Mean
Imagine you're facing one of the most important moments of your career, a moment in which you must be on top of your game and perform at your peak capacity. Everyone is counting on you; the whole world is watching. Concentration is paramount. And then, when the moment of truth comes, and you're read...

Jason Kidd Is Aware Of His Physical Advantages
You know the NBA season is just around the corner when Jason Kidd is in the gossip pages again. The Nets point guard is accused of groping a woman (twice!) and then informing her of his rather imposing physical advantage....

That Manny ... What's He Gonna Say Next?!
By now, everybody knows about Manny Ramirez's supposedly "controversial" comments about not "caring" whether or not the Red Sox win the ALCS....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while trying to decide if the suckatorium is a brothel, or another name for Fenway Park ... • Golf: PGA of America, Grand Slam of Golf, final round, at Tucker's Town, Bermuda. I'll be at the cabana bar. [TNT] • NBA: Preseason, Cleveland vs. Orlando, at Shanghai. I'll be in the pirate s...

Witness Bill Simmons In Tight Tight Tights
The E-Ticket section on ESPN.com has always been one of the stronger elements of the site, and the show, while occasionally lapsing into the same soft-focus weeper segments that permeate Chris Connelly's "reports," trades off it well. Jeremy Schaap's Cecil Fielder story was fascinating; it was hard ...

David Boston Will Attack You With Comfortable Pillows
Poor David Boston. A Pro Bowl receiver with the Cardinals in 2001, he's dogged by injuries and bounces around to three other teams, tests positive for steroids, then is nabbed for DUI. And now the worst of all misdeeds: Domestic cushion assault....

The Journalists Is Smart And Diligent
How absurd has the the Kobe Bryant story become? There was a rather large media kerfuffle at Lakers practice yesterday revolving around whether or not Kobe had cleaned out his locker. It turned out that he hadn't cleaned out his locker; he had merely cleaned it. Say what you will about the status of...

Red Sox Don't Have The Required 15 Pieces Of Flair
What they're saying out there in "the creative underclass" about Cleveland's 3-1 lead over Boston in the American League Championship Series ......

It's True: The Red Sox Have Become The Yankees
The kewpie doll this morning goes to commenters Chad Sexington (who provided us with this wonderfully ironic photo (and this animated GIF) and, especially, Fiddling While Jim Rome Burns, who came up with a theory that just might explain what's happening to the Red Sox right now. He calls it The Keki...

Behold The Wonder That Is Tim Wakefield
The man you see in this picture, about to knuckle that wildly bouncing arrow into the leg of the man standing next to him, is Tim Wakefield. He has been with the Red Sox since 1995 and has ridden all the postseason waves that have surrounded the team during that time. And tonight, he has to save th...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as Cindy takes out the entire Brady family with a machete while they sleep ... • Boxing: Welterweights, Alfonso Gomez vs. Ben Tackie, at Carson, Calif. I opened a can of Whoopass, but it spilled all over the linoleum. [ESPN] • MLB: American League Championship Series, Game 4, Boston at...

Look For The Large Wide Receiver At Your Door Today
You know how Pizza Hut offered to explain the importance of tipping to Lions wide receiver Roy Williams, a notorious avoider of the practice. Well, today, Roy Williams is doing his part to understand how the other 99 percent lives....

Kevin Johnson Has Little Use For Your Meat
Have you been wondering what former Phoenix Suns guard Kevin Johnson has been up to? We know we have! Well, we'd like you to sit down and write down 49,125 different guesses of how Kevin Johnson spends his time these days. We're gonna bet you don't come up with the right answer. (And we're sorry thi...

Brandon Lloyd Thinks Troy Aikman Listens To Coldplay
You might have heard about this by now, but just in case: It appears former Illini and current Washington Redskin Brandon Lloyd is taking his radio tips from Skip Bayless. That is to say: He's accusing Troy Aikman of being gay on the public airwaves....

Derek Jeter Takes Care Of His Ladies
If you needed any more proof that the life of an athlete is infinitely better than yours — and, surely, you did — witness this tale from Miami, involving Derek Jeter, two woman and the Parking Validation That Never Came....

Everything's Jake
How the wee ones and zeros line up concerning Cleveland's 4-2 win over Boston in Game 3 of the American League Championship Series ......