to Page 2069 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lookin' Sharp!
• Mike Nolan's suit is enough to almost make us want to root for the 49ers this year. [With Leather] • Goodbye, Sal. Goodbye. [The 700 Level] • Haiti's soccer team tries to defect. [This Is American Soccer] • Wait, you can sell season tickets for a franchise you don't own? [The Star] • Bill Simmons ...

Let's Laugh At The Dancing Red Sox Fans
Just to pile on ... some douchey Red Sox fans....

How Mark McGwire Will Get You On Jury Duty
Part of our job is to bring you the best links we can from around the Web, highlighting all the talented people doing amazing things simply because they love it. But the site we think might be the best, and the one we read more religiously than any other, is Viva El Birdos. We don't link it that oft...

For Freedom! To The Death! For Bongs!
Thank you, Awful Announcing, thank you tremendously for this random piece of brilliance: It's 300-esque Noodle Fighting on the campus of UC Davis. Somedays we don't miss the aimless shambling of college ... and somedays, like today, we do, oh, how we do....

Baseball Fans Search For Loopholes On Billy Donovan Night
We are not here to mock you, Billy Donovan. Yes, you backed out of your $27.5 million deal to coach the Orlando Magic; but we feel your pain. Steve Spurrier feels your pain. Homer and Ned feel your pain. And the Fort Myers Miracle minor league baseball team, they ... well, OK, they're here to mock y...

Behind The Scenes Of The Eastern Motors Magic
You might remember those famous Eastern Motors advertisements in Washington D.C., in which various area athletes remind residents that "their job is their credit," through the majesty of song. Well, DC Sports Bog, which is the future, was on set for the taping of the newest commercial, and it's proo...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while enjoying kiwi sausage goodness and the refreshing taste of fresh cucumber soda ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Edner "Not Exactly" Cherry vs. Wes "31 Flavors" Ferguson, at Tampa. [ESPN2] • MLB: Arizona at N.Y. Yankees. Watch the fun as Randy Johnson switches teams again. [ESPN] • MLB...

Trying To Salvage What's Left Of The NBA Season
As we sift through the carnage of a mostly D.O.A. NBA Finals, we wonder: Can anything save it at this point? The popular theory is that Cavs coach Mike Brown is destroying any slim hope his team has — maybe he should play Eric Snow more — and, in addition, he's making the games excruciating to watch...

Watch The Felt
• Snooker players, fighting. Fun! [Deuce Of Davenport] • Just to remind you, Ankiel's still hitting the crap out of the ball. [Memphis Commercial Appeal] • Placido Polanco, with whom we share a birthday, is atop the AL second basemen in All-Star voting. [MLB.com] • Darren Rovell explains what it mea...

A Requiem For Bad Moon's Money
For months now, we've been trying to figure out why, during our exhibition football game against Andre Rison and Kordell Stewart, Rison felt obliged to hug us. We felt we had competed hard, but not quite worthy of a hug. We thought maybe Andre was just lonely. Maybe he missed Left Eye?...

Elijah Dukes Continues To Bat 1.000
If you're a social worker who is considering a foster care applicaton, how could you not approve the couple who is related to Elijah Dukes? A 17-year-old girl who is in foster care with a relative of Dukes told the Tampa police that Dukes got her pregnant. The article goes on to say that Dukes will ...

The Witnesses May Step Down
This picture kind of sums up why the NBA Finals, after the brief hope of LeBron's ascension, has become a must-miss: People flailing around, grabbing each other, and the Spurs efficiently cruising along. Last night was closer, we suppose, but we just can't fire ourselves up that much for an NBA Fina...

Will The Cavs Make This Even Slightly Interesting?
The ratings are down, the excitement level is low, and the day after Game Two, every sports site from ESPN to us was talking more about "The Sopranos" than yet another Spurs dismantling. And you think there were yawns yesterday? If the Spurs win tonight, bringing this to 3-0, people will be leading ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your wife knits you a personality ... • NBA: Finals, San Antonio at Cleveland, Game 3. Will this be Cavalicious, or Spurtacular? [ABC] • WNBA: Washington at New York. Forget the game ... we must dance! [ESPN2] • MLB: Rockies at Red Sox. If God had meant these teams to meet he wouldn...

It's Been One Year Since Big Ben's Curbing
You know, time really flies when you've banged your head against pavement at 50 miles per hour. It's like you can't get perspective on matters, or something. Yes, folks, it has been exactly one year today since Ben Roethlisberger's motorcycle accident. It's a day Steelers fans will always remember,...

One Eager Eagle
• Boy, Donovan McNabb is back on the practice field fast. Is this a good thing? [Melblog] • Has Shaun Rogers been out gropin'? [FanNation] • The Hearst Corporation wants some steroid names, and it wants them now. [New York Times] • A Page 2 ode to our man Rick Ankiel. [A.M. Jump] • Matt Leinart has ...

This Is Why Ricky Bobby Always Keeps Both Hands On The Wheel
We suppose this is racing's version of the Leon Lett/Don Beebe play in Super Bowl XXVII ... dude is winning this racing extravaganza by a wide margin, until he begins waving to the crowd in triumph and loses control of the vehicle. And, into the wall! He then exits the car — just feet short of the f...

Is Gilbert Really Gonna Leave?
With everyone up in arms about the possibility of Gilbert Arenas leaving the Wizards, we thought we'd look at whether or not he would actually leave. After all, Gilbert is that rare superstar athlete who seems human and likable, and the average fan doesn't like to see a guy like that just — all toge...

Everywhere You Look, There Is Steve Phillips
After watching this Steve Phillips gimmick segment on "Baseball Tonight" last night, we await, with much dread, the attack of the Steve Phillips clone army....
