to Page 877 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Universe Must Deliver A Rockets-Thunder Playoff Series
The Oklahoma City Thunder handed the Houston Rockets just their 7th home loss of the season Saturday night, by the relatively low score of 108-102. The Rockets were without Eric Gordon and Ryan Anderson, but that’s not supposed to matter much—the Rockets had all of Chris Paul, James Harden, and Clin...
Anthony Rendon Lays Into Umpire Marty Foster For Erratic Strike Zone And Quick Temper
Marty Foster’s ejection of Anthony Rendon Saturday was puzzling enough that it immediately overshadowed the circumstances of the pitch that caused the conflict. Let’s get to that: it looked inside to Rendon; it looked inside on the broadcast; it, in fact, was inside—Foster’s strike zone was a little...
Hoo Boy, The Padres Lost In The Dumbest Way Imaginable
You really will not believe this one. The Astros had a man on second with two outs in the bottom of the 10th inning last night, against the Padres, in a scoreless game. Batter Alex Bregman popped a rising 3-2 fastball from Padres pitcher Phil Maton straight up in the air. Easy out! Guaranteed out. R...
Angry Baby Umpire Ejects Anthony Rendon For Absolutely Nothing
Anthony Rendon had never been ejected from a game in the majors headed into Saturday’s home game against the Mets. That streak—640 regular season games—came to an end in the bottom of the third inning, after Rendon struck out looking to end the inning, and was blatantly disrespectful to umpire Marty...
Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before: The Washington Wizards Are Melting Down
God, the Wizards suck so bad. They are almost certainly the sorriest team that has not been eliminated from the playoffs: by win percentage (.525 as of Saturday morning) they’re behind the Western Conference’s 10th seed; they’ve lost four in a row and eight of 10; four of those losses have come to t...
Oh God, Even Our Parent Company Is Airing The Barstool Sports CEO's Evasive, Charming Bullshit
Since she was hired as CEO of Barstool Sports in July 2016, Erika Nardini has done countless interviews about the company’s growing revenue and “disruptive” business model of publishing misogyny because it’s fun. (Some greatest hits are in the video above.)...
Report: MSU Basketball Player Charged With Assault Last Month
Michigan State walk-on basketball player Brock Washington, who was reportedly under investigation for criminal sexual conduct in February, has been charged with misdemeanor assault by prosecutors in Ingham County, MI., according to ESPN. The details of how that charge came about, however, remain ext...
Scott Brooks Looked Like He Wanted To Die
Last night’s game between the Cavs and Wizards was a fun one, featuring LeBron James fully rounding in playoff form and orchestrating a 32-14 run to close out the last 7:48 of the game. The game also offered us a chance to see Wizards head coach Scott Brooks’s soul die, little by little....
Tim Tebow Has Risen To Double-A, Goes The Distance On First Pitch<em></em>
The Bronco has become the Rumble Pony. Tim Tebow has moved up a level in his minor-league baseball career, and in his first pitch of his first at-bat with the New York Mets’ Double-A affiliate Binghamton Rumble Ponies, he took one deep for a three-run homer:...
Tony Finau And His Bum Ankle Finish 4 Under, Near Top Of First-Round Leaderboard
Yesterday, Tony Finau’s first time at Augusta looked like it might be over before it even got a chance to start; today, he’s sitting pretty in second place after one of the best Masters debuts in a decade....
A Bald Eagle Tried To Land On James Paxton<em></em>
British Columbia native and Seattle Mariners pitcher James Paxton was standing politely at attention for the national anthem when an ostensibly trained bald eagle decided it would rather be on his shoulder than the ballpark grass. Paxton showed tremendous poise, however, by calmly accommodating the ...
"The Most Dangerous Man In College Basketball" Dodged FBI Charges By Pocketing Money Meant For Athletes<em></em>
Brad Augustine was described and profiled by Yahoo! Sports as “the most dangerous man in college basketball” just six months ago; now, that dangerous man is skating on any punishment for his alleged crimes....
Kyrie Irving Is Out For The Playoffs And The Celtics Are Hosed
Oh goddamnit. ...
Bob McNair Regrets His Apology For His Regrettable "Inmates" Remark<em></em>
Texans owner Bob McNair had a tense standoff with his players last season after he remarked, “We can’t have the inmates running the prison,” during an October owner-player meeting about the national anthem demonstrations. Star receiver DeAndre Hopkins skipped practice in protest; a number of Texans ...
Gaze Upon This Mavericks Box Score, And Despair
The Dallas Mavericks, who have spent most of the season doing everything they can to lose games on purpose, fucked up big time on Tuesday night when they beat a very good, playoff-bound Blazers team. This gave them 24 victories on the season, and put them in danger of being passed in The Great Tank ...
CMU Soccer Player Rescues Drowning Squirrel, Revives It With CPR Thanks In Part To <i>The Office</i>
In a heartwarming tale of a college freshman doing something right, Central Michigan women’s soccer player Natalie Belsito saved a drowning critter on campus. She credited the successful rescue to an episode of The Office....
Tony Finau Fucked Up His Ankle While Celebrating A Hole-In-One At The Masters Par-3 Contest
Tony Finau, ranked No. 34 in the world, showed out at the Masters Par-3 contest with a very slick hole-in-one, which he immediately followed up by suffering some sort of gross-looking ankle injury while celebrating. ...
A Wise Homeowner's Guide To Acquiring A Rad Tool Collection
Hello. It’s me, a guy who made a “sound financial decision” and purchased a home. I may no longer be “throwing money away” on rent, but here’s the thing people always forget to tell you about owning a house: it presents you with an infinite supply of things to throw money away on. I’m here to help y...
Spring Is Here, And That Means It's Time For The Toronto Raptors To Wither And Die
The Toronto Raptors, the first-place team in the Eastern Conference, lost last night, to the third-place Cleveland Cavaliers. They lost to the badly depleted second-place Boston Celtics three nights prior. They’ve lost five of their last eight games, the worst stretch in what’s so far been the best ...
I Love Watching Kyle Anderson Do Hilariously Slow Basketball
Among the many reasons you’d be galactically screwed if you lined up on the perimeter to defend an NBA player, speed is the scariest. Before you stand some of the tallest, longest, twitchiest, most volatile athletes in the world, with good options available at every juncture: stop dead and pop a jum...