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Seven Years After His First Major League Win, César Valdez Has His Second
The Blue Jays’ lack of rotation depth has forced them to be, uh, resourceful at times with their starting pitchers—29-year-old rookie Casey Lawrence, middle reliever Joe Biagini, a washed-up and struggling Mat Latos. Tonight gave them one more to add to that list: 32-year-old minor league journeyman...
Yankees Produce Rare Run-Scoring Triple Play With Didi Gregorius Base-Running Goof
Todd Frazier’s first home plate appearance at Yankee Stadium was one to remember. He knocked in a run to take a 1-0 lead, yeah—but he did so in what ultimately became a triple play, thanks to teammate Didi Gregorius’s antics on the base paths. Gregorius, who was on second base to start the play, got...
Duane Brown's Holdout Is A Test
Duane Brown is testing the system. Brown, who is about to enter his 10th season as the Texans’ starting left tackle, has not reported for the start of training camp. He has two non-guaranteed years remaining on his contract, and he wants a new deal....
Report: Yu Darvish Is Officially For Sale
Rangers ace Yu Darvish is 30 years old, will be a free agent after this season, and is pitching at the high level he always does when healthy for a team that’s lost more than it’s won, all of which has made him a pretty obvious candidate to get moved before this month’s trade deadline. Now, accordin...
Suddenly, Jose Altuve Is The Best Player In Baseball
It’s not really a shock, given that Astros second baseman Jose Altuve finished last season with 6.7 WAR and has been putting up ridiculous statistics for years now, but the little guy is currently your MVP frontrunner....
Don't Look Now, But The Yankees Might Be Interested In Giancarlo Stanton
Giancarlo Stanton was definitely thinking home run. In a rare visit to the Rangers, one of the few ballparks the Marlins slugger hasn’t homered in, Stanton realized this might be his last chance for a while to notch it on his belt. (Well, his last chance for a while unless he becomes a Yankee soon. ...
Defensive Back David Bruton Retires "To Have My Brain Functioning When I Get A Little Older"
After sustaining six concussions over eight years in the NFL, David Bruton announced his retirement to the Denver Post today. ...
Chris Froome's Next Race Will Be Against History
There hasn’t been genuine last-week intrigue about who would win any Tour de France since 2011, when Cadel Evans took the yellow jersey from Andy Schleck on the penultimate day of the race. Schleck gouged Evans and the rest of the field for minutes on Stage 18's summit finish atop the Col du Galibie...
Red Sox Admit That WEEI Hosts Say Some Shitty Things
WEEI is where to go to hear Boston Red Sox games on the radio. It’s been that way for most years since 1995, and it will continue to be that way through 2023. Despite the partnership, the team can still acknowledge that the radio station encourages some terrible people....
Giannis Antetokounmpo Gently Defends Kevin Durant's OKC Departure
Giannis Antetokounmpo is in the Philippines attending an event for Filipino youth, and yesterday someone in attendance asked him a tough question about team loyalty in the NBA. The Bucks’ star cephalopod has reportedly exclaimed that he wanted to play in Milwaukee for “20 years.” And here is his mos...
Christopher Nolan, Please Stop Hiding Tom Hardy's Big Beautiful Lips From Us
You’re a human person with functioning eyeballs and so I don’t need to convince you that Tom Hardy has a good face featuring a pair of full, impressive lips. The lips are nice. They are the kind of lips that could easily become a piece of cultural shorthand. “That dude has Tom Hardy lips,” you might...
Tanking Enthusiast Bernard Tomic: "I Don't Tank, I Just Get Disappointed In Myself"
Bernard Tomic could have hypothetically—very hypothetically—spent a healthy career lurking in the top 15, upending the greats every so often. It is not especially hard to envision this alternate timeline. The 24-year-old Australian had the raw talent for it: He is 6-foot-5 and a little lumbering but...
Report: Clayton Kershaw Could Be Out Up To Six Weeks With Back Injury
Clayton Kershaw, who went on the 10-day DL yesterday after being pulled from his start against the Braves after two innings with lower-back tightness, could be out of action for more than a month....
There's No Reason To Write Credulously About Tom Brady's Quack Trainer
Sports Illustrated’s Greg Bishop has a piece out today about the steps older athletes are taking to stay in playing shape. A good chunk of it deals with Tom Brady and his fitness guru, Alex Guerrero. Within that chunk Bishop submits his entry for Most Embarrassing Parenthetical Of The Year:...
No One Could See WWE’s Main Event Last Night
Last night, WWE champion Jinder Mahal faced Randy Orton in the third-ever Punjabi Prison match. It did not go over well with the crowd in South Philadelphia. Fans chanted for CM Punk. Fans chanted “delete” for Matt Hardy. Fans chanted “Trust the Process.”...
Man With Nazi Tattoos Attends Indians Game
During yesterday’s Blue Jays-Indians game, a man who was at the game tweeted pictures of a shirtless fan who had prominent swastika tattoos on his back....
Here's Why David Price Blew Up At Dennis Eckersley<em></em>
It’s been a contentious couple of months for Red Sox starter David Price, who only made his season debut on Memorial Day and has seemingly spent as much time shouting at Boston media members as actually pitching. Last month he got into it with CSNNE’s Evan Drellich over an entirely inoffensive tweet...
Cleveland's Offseason Is Turning Into A Real Nightmare
Dan Gilbert and the Cavaliers have made a massive fucking mess of the 2017 NBA offseason. It’s hard to believe a team that can basically sleepwalk backwards through the regular season and wake up in the Finals would find itself seemingly on the brink of total meltdown, but here we are....
Dipshit Drivers Unable To Avoid Caution For Even Seven Seconds
The Brickyard 400 started five hours, 44 minutes ago. It’s still going on—an hour ago, there were just ten laps to go—because these dumb fuckers can’t stop wrecking their goddamned cars. ...
And Now: Ken "Hawk" Harrelson & Steve Stone Discuss Hemorrhoids<em></em>
It’s late July and the White Sox are dutifully maintaining their position at the bottom of the American League. In other bottom-related news, here’s your White Sox announcing crew discussing hemorrhoids during the sixth inning of today’s matchup in Kansas City—one the team lost on a walk-off double ...