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The 25 Most Stilted, Cringe-Inducing Athlete TV Cameos Of 2012 (Featuring Ryan Lochte The Sex Idiot)
2012 was a big year for athletes appearing on the little screen. Below are notes and grades for these 25 guest turns:...
Russell Wilson Is The Quarterback Darrell Bevell Always Wanted
Nineteen years ago, Darrell Bevell, a redshirt freshman transfer fresh off his Mormon mission, led Wisconsin to its first Rose Bowl win—an ugly 21-16 victory over UCLA that featured seven fumbles. Bevell's clinching touchdown came on a particularly un-balletic play. The video isn't online, but here'...
Who Is The Most Masturbated-To Woman In History?
I just recently got a Christmas card from Drew and his family and I have to say: Is there any bigger fucking waste of time, energy, and paper than a Christmas card? I understand why people used to do it before Facebook existed, but currently, if someone has a baby, not a day goes by that a photo of ...
"Buster Olney U So Full A Shit": The Year In Great, Terrible, And Deeply Weird Tweets From The World Of Sports
2012 offered many windows into the athlete soul, but none were larger or more revealing than the unfiltered weirdness that came from their screwy social media presences. Here are our favorites, from Cardale Jones delicately explaining that he wasn't recruited to Ohio State for his academic prowess, ...
The Carolina Panthers Twitter Account Retweeted A Fan Who Got A Bag Of Weed For Christmas
In the spirit of holidays, the Carolina Panthers Twitter account is retweeting fans who received Panthers-themed gifts for Christmas. This fan got a new hat and a bag of weed! I was not aware Santa started delivering that stuff....
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?
As in past years, the Sun Sentinel has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, we have trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity. ...
Tim Tebow Is A Coddled Malcontent
The Jets dressed three quarterbacks for their game against the Chargers yesterday—a game they lost, 27-17. Greg McElroy, the former Alabama quarterback who, evidently, never faced a pass rush while he was there, started, while Tim Tebow and Mark Sanchez backed him up. (Neither was the No. 3 quarterb...
!["Hallelujah, Holy Shit! Where's The Tylenol?": Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup [Updated]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1899jl1oxhk5ugif.gif)
"Hallelujah, Holy Shit! Where's The Tylenol?": Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup [Updated]
We'll be putting all our GIFs for the day here, from London Fletcher losing his lunch to sad Tom Brady. We'll update the post as the later games conclude, so stay tuned. ...
The Gift That Keeps On Giving: Your NFL Late Games Viewing Guide
There are three more gifts under the tree. Let's open them up together. ...
Christmas Came Early: Your NFL Early Games Viewing Guide
We've got a busy start to the day in NFL-land where every game is a gift, with varying degrees of usefulness and did-I-even-ask-for-this-piece-of-junk?-ness. ...
How To Cook A Pot Roast: A Guide For People Who Want To Live, Dammit
Somewhere along the way, it got common to treat Christmas dinner like Thanksgiving II: This Time Without Turkey—like a big showpiece meal for which amateur cooks are meant to serve up some impressive exotic culinary masterpiece far outside the bounds of their humble repertoire of comfort foods. Take...
Dead Letters: "Your 'Journalistic' Reputation Is Now Toast"
Subject: idiots...
Which TV Market Is Getting Screwed This Sunday? An Analysis Of Week 16 NFL Viewing Maps
The NFL's regional programming rules are famously byzantine, but luckily the506.com cuts through the bullshit for you, providing weekly maps that allow us to answer the only question that really matters: Which fans are the most screwed this Sunday?...
The <em>Other</em> Existential Threat To The NFL: RedZone Channel
Every December, we near the end of the NFL season and the coming of Festivus, a wonderful holiday that begins with an airing of grievances. It's a holiday we inflict on loved ones, because only loved ones teach us to feel a profound peevishness. The hidden wage of loving is having to pay close, agon...
Shitballs And Bucketloads Of Cunt: The Year In Cursing
George Carlin's been dead for four years, but that doesn't mean the scourge of cursing on television is beyond us. Indeed, it was a regrettable year for foul language of both the intentional and unintentional varieties. Here's a sample of what corrupted our children's ears in 2012, with links bel...
Does <em>A Charlie Brown Christmas</em> Suck? A Very Deadspin Debate
It's Christmastime again, and, as such, your TV will be running some Peanuts specials throughout this week and weekend. If you have kids, you may not be able to escape them—the specials, that is. Could it be worse? We debated the matter last year:...
All Hail The Power Of The Pregame Warmup
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season....
How Fred Gaudelli Turned NBC's <em>Sunday Night Football</em> Into The No. 1 Show On TV
With 7:30 left in the second quarter of an otherwise forgettable October game between Pittsburgh and Cincinnati, Cris Collinsworth said the name that had been on Fred Gaudelli's mind for at least five days. ...
How The Worst Commissioner In Sports Broke The NHL
Originally published in Bloomberg View....
Jerry Seinfeld Is The Worst
I've reached my tipping point with Jerry Seinfeld. It happened today, with this endless New York Times writeup that no one asked for, which includes the following caption: ...