ty Page 460 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bernie Sanders Can't Save Black People
Bernie Sanders, the senator from the very great state of Vermont, is campaigning to be the next president of the United States of America. As such, he is giving speeches throughout the land. This past weekend, his ongoing tour took him to Seattle, Wash., where he stumped in front of people at Westla...

José Mourinho Demotes Team Doctor After Blowing Up Her Spot On Pitch
Eva Carneiro, the long-serving Chelsea first team doctor, has been a staple of the team’s matches over the years, rushing out onto the pitch as the first responder to any and all of their injuries. It’s very likely that one such attempt to treat a player on the field last weekend will be her last, h...

Carmelo Anthony To Knicks Fan: "You Are Stuck With Me, Buddy."
Carmelo Anthony has never been one to shy away from mixing it up with his fans and haters on social media, and his latest response to a rude Instagram commenter is that of a man who is feeling pretty fed up....

Illinois Defensive Back Eric Finney Is Really Good At Taking Surveys
The Champaign-based News-Gazette is surveying Illinois football players before the season to learn fun facts about them. On Sunday, Illini defensive back Eric Finney filled out an entry. He did a really good job....

How To Throw A House Show Without Getting Evicted
Getting bands to play at your house might seem like a hackneyed plot only plausible within the confines of movie-fantasy college parties. But grimy, do-it-yourself house shows hold a key quality that makes them far superior to those ridiculous cinematic ragers, wherein models take shots from ice lug...

New York Red Bulls Fans Drop Sick Burn On NYCFC And The Rest Of MLS
Kinda hard to argue when Pirlo’s playing like this:...

Sandwich Board Becomes Weapon In New Jersey Soccer Fight
The third New York Derby takes place this evening, and it got wild in New Jersey beforehand. The AP’s Rob Harris was there as a brawl popped off out front of Bello’s Bar & Grill, right across the Passaic River from Red Bull Arena. One dude even started swinging with a sandwich board:...

Leicester City Player Calls Man "Jap" At Casino, Apologizes
Leicester City are at it again. Striker Jamie Vardy was caught on camera at a Leicester casino On July 26th repeatedly calling a man “jap” because he thought he was looking over his shoulder at his cards. He has since apologized for the incident, but the club are investigating. Vardy started and sco...

Jose Mourinho Is In Midseason Form As Chelsea Barely Survive Swansea
Chelsea opened their Premier League title defense today with a topsy turvy 2-2 draw against Swansea City. As you can see, Jose Mourinho ain’t too happy about it. Our staff of amateur lip readers concurs that he’s dropping a “Fuck off Michael!”—directed towards referee Michael Oliver—but you could ma...

Extreme Humidity Is Turning My Home Into Gorgonzola
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

The Best Of The Best: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 3
You’ve made it to the third and final installment of our Premier League preview, and what lies below is a rundown of what we at Deadspin consider the six (6) least bad teams in all of England’s top flight. This thirdish of the league is important because this is where teams are fighting for all-impo...

Report: NFL Might Sell Season Tickets For Non-Existent L.A. Team
According to Fox Sports’ Mike Garafolo, NFL owners will meet next week and discuss selling season tickets to NFL fans in Los Angeles. As you are probably aware, there is no NFL team in L.A. for these fans to go watch with their season tickets, but who cares!...

Baseball Squirrel Just Thinks It Can Go Wherever It Wants
A dumb squirrel jumped onto the field in the eighth inning of today’s Royals-Tigers game, and acted like it owned the damn place. The stupid thing ran around as if people were there to watch it. Hey, here’s a newsflash: they weren’t....

Starting From The Bottom: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 1
PREMIER LEAGUE BACK....

Here's The "Integrity Of The Game" Honor Code The NFL Says Brady Broke
For the first time—as far as we can tell—the NFL’s secret honor oath has become public, as part of the NFLPA’s lawsuit over Tom Brady’s suspension. It’s this “Integrity Of The Game Certification” upon which the NFL has hinged its four-game ban on the Patriots quarterback, and yet the text of this ho...

Judge Rules Rams Can Build Publicly Financed Stadium Without A Vote
Thanks to a judge’s ruling, the St. Louis Rams are one step closer to fleecing the residents of St. Louis for hundreds of millions of dollars....

The Greatest Boxer Alive Is Too Good For His Sport
Guillermo Rigondeaux—El Chacal, or The Jackal—is by far the greatest fighter in the world today. He may be the greatest fighter of the last 20 years. Unfortunately, he will soon lose for the first time, surely by knockout, and with his defeat will come sighs of relief and a lot of people saying, “I ...

Dez Bryant Trades Haymakers With Teammate At Training Camp
This training camp fight between Dez Bryant and Tyler Patmon is an ideal version of the form, I suppose. There’s a lot of bluster and some big punches thrown, but no actual damage done, so both parties get to walk away looking tough and cool....

The Royals And Blue Jays Hate Each Other And We're All Winners
So, here we go. The postseason series we’d get if there’s any justice in this world. Royals and Blue Jays, two newly resurgent franchises with big designs on October, and a sharp and abiding acrimony for each other that wasn’t satisfied by yesterday’s bench-clearing or name-calling....