ty Page 688 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
New Jersey Man Allegedly Calls 911 From His Pillow Fort, Demands To Speak To Tim Tebow
From the Hopatcong Patch comes the strange story of one man and his desire to speak with Tim Tebow. I'll let the lead from the article, which is one of the best leads I've ever read, set the table for you:...
Dan Snyder's Official Team Bio Is A Tour De Force Of Bullshit
When you think of Redskins owner Dan Snyder, you think of a miserable, gutless sack of shit who ruined a franchise and made an entire fanbase hate his guts. Ah, but that's just how Dan Snyder is perceived in the real world. The world of official team bios, on the other hand, is magical place where a...
Three Toronto FC Players Arrested In Nightclub Brawl
In Houston ahead of Wednesday's match against the Dynamo, three Toronto FC players found themselves spending a night in jail. According to the Toronto Sun, Luis Silva, Miguel Aceval and Nick Soolsma were arrested for public intoxication after being involved with a fight at the Escobar club in Midtow...
The U.S. Open Trophy Ceremony Videobomber Is A Deforestation Activist Named "Jungle Bird"
The roosterlike fellow who invaded last night's U.S. Open trophy ceremony and earned a scolding from champion Webb Simpson has been identified as a kooky deforestation activist named "Jungle Bird."...
The Thunder-Heat Series Isn't About The Noise; It's About The Beauty
Before turning on the television to watch Game 3 of the NBA Finals last night, I made the mistake of going to ESPN.com to read about the game, and then I compounded that mistake by clicking on this link, which led me to a video clip of Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless screaming about how terrible ...
Report: The NHL Is Planning To Seize The New Jersey Devils From Their Owner
Jeff Vanderbeek, he's the guy above, not the guy from Dawson's Creek. He owns the New Jersey Devils, or at least he "owns" them in the same way that the Wilpons own the Mets or Frank McCourt owned the Dodgers. Oodles of his debt weigh the team down, and he can't pay it off. The Devils missed a loan ...
Your NBA Finals Game 3 Open Thread
The adjective of the night is static. Russell Westbrook ain't changing. The Thunder ain't changing. Will these refusals to change, result in changes themselves? Or will the Heat remain true to form and blow the doors off the place early only to slowly bleed to death? That's why we watch and talk, d...
Anthony Hargrove's Agent Blasts The NFL For "Semantics-Gate"
Tomorrow, Roger Goodell is set to hear the appeal on all four current and former Saints players who have been suspended for their respective roles in the alleged New Orleans bounty program. On Friday, the NFL released less than 200 pages worth of documentation it intended to rely upon to uphold the...
Captain Mike Dixon: Women Arrested For Allegedly "Exposing Their Sexual Organs" On Golf Course
We are equal opportunity mockers here at Deadspin, so it is only fair that when we make fun of dudes whipping out their penises on a golf course, we do the same for women and their sexual organs. This time, however, it only took a phone call, not a shameful letter to expose the offenders....
Beau Hossler Is Young, Has Braces
As we await the final round of the 2012 U.S. Open, the story of the week has been the young amateur Beau Hossler. He is a 17-year-old junior from Santa Margarita High and he is tied for eighth, four off the lead. There's a lot to say about a performance like this on a course that is humbling the be...
Exclusively From The Mike Tyson Collection: Black Energy
Courtesy of Grant Wahl, comes this bizarre billboard in Poland for some kind of energy drink. There is a whole lot to lovingly scratch your head about here. The idea of a company marketing an energy drink called "Black Energy," for one. The other products that make up the Mike Tyson Collection, for...
![Fernando Tatís Had A Nice Chat With Homer Simpson On Twitter [CORRECTION]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17py99ljkjesnjpg.jpg)
Fernando Tatís Had A Nice Chat With Homer Simpson On Twitter [CORRECTION]
To hear Fernando Tatís tell it, he learned to speak English from The Simpsons while he was working his way up through the minor leagues. He eventually made it out of the the minors and played 11 season in Major League Baseball for the Rangers, Cardinals, Nationals Expos, Orioles and finally the Met...
Justin Tuck's Crazy New Facemask Is Awesome <em>And</em> Functional
This season New York Giants defensive end Justin Tuck will be taking the field with a particularly striking helmet that looks like something that a mean robot would wear. Although the mask is aesthetically pleasing and will make Tuck look undeniably badass, it actually serves a purpose as well....
Arena Football Player Has Best Excuse Ever For Why His Apartment Caught On Fire
"Kevin Marcus Ellison of the Spokane Shock claims he was told by God to torch his apartment with a marijuana blunt." Happens to the best of us....
![Are Jose Canseco And The Worcester Tornadoes Parting Ways? [UPDATED]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17pv7v9vnhjfjjpg.jpg)
Are Jose Canseco And The Worcester Tornadoes Parting Ways? [UPDATED]
That's the speculation going around central Massachusetts after one of Canseco's teammates, outfielder Cameron Monger, tweeted the following early this morning: "Tonight will be @JoseCanseco's last game with the #Tornadoes. Hope he goes out with a bang." Monger has since deleted the tweet, but not...
![On Errors, Human Error, And R.A. Dickey's Maybe-Hitter [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17pv5zyxqgwcwjpg.jpg)
On Errors, Human Error, And R.A. Dickey's Maybe-Hitter [UPDATE]
Today, Friday, we find out if R.A. Dickey threw a no-hitter on Wednesday. The dissonance of that statement should itself tell you what the "right" answer is. A no-hitter is about the mounting pressure of the late innings, the superstitious avoidance of a pitcher in the dugout, the social aspect of c...
Yes, LeBron James Fouled Kevin Durant
Kevin Durant's shot with 10 seconds left to tie last night's NBA Finals Game 2 didn't drop, and now the series is tied 1-1. Arguing over whether a foul should have been called on LeBron James is silly; Durant just as easily could have been called for a charge moments before, and there's no guaran...
Heavy Wind Nearly Propels Grounds Crew Worker Into Orbit
Keep your eye on back row of grounds crew workers in the video above, specifically the fourth person from the left. Even if you can't find him right away, you certainly will by the six-second mark, when the wind launches him several feet off the ground. That's Kyle Smith, the general manager of th...
Russell Westbrook Finds The National Anthem Boring
Russell Westbrook missed his first six shots of last night's NBA Finals Game 2, and the Thunder's slow start left them unable to overcome the Heat despite a thrilling finish. A bellwether for Westbrook's anemic first quarter performance came before the game, when during the national anthem he looke...
Company Paid To Monitor College Athletes' Twitter And Facebook Accounts Has A Sock-Puppet Business Address IRL
Last month, we met three firms that colleges are using to monitor athletes on Facebook and Twitter. It's ethically and procedurally dubious work, so you might assume the companies would be extra-scrupulous about how they run their own businesses....