ty Page 799 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

City Wins Big Despite Losing Richards, Deco Is the Difference For Chelsea
Manchester City's 3-0 drubbing of woeful West Ham was marred early in the second half when Micah Richards went down with a head injury after a midair collision with new teammate Tal Ben Haim. City's young star was treated by medical personnel on the pitch before being taken away on a stretcher. Aft...

What Could He Have Possibly Done Wrong?
There's no reason to speculate as to why Louisville back-up quarterback Matt Simms was suspended for four games for "an unspecified violation of team policy." None at all. It could be plenty of things. Maybe he was studying too hard for his physics exam and missed a mandatory meeting? Or perhaps he ...

Gay Can't Come Up With Burst In Heat, Denied Shot At Gold
By now you've almost certainly realized that American sprinter and butt-end of sophomoric humor (hehe, butt) Tyson Gay didn't even qualify for the final in the 100-meter (328 feet) dash, which was won in record-breaking fashion by Jamaica's Usain Bolt. Two great last names, each respectively illustr...

College Football Previews: #18 Tennessee
Last year Tennessee was 10-4 and won the SEC East. Change just three plays from three different games (a made field goal against South Carolina that sent the game into OT, Vanderbilt's missed field goal that would have won the Dores the game, and a blocked Kentucky field goal in OT) and Tennessee i...

College Football Preview: #24 Michigan
Brian Cook writes MGoBlog He is a professional blogger and only puts on pants when he's cold. Yes, he has a girlfriend. STRENGTHS. Michigan's main asset this year is its rich history. And its stadium renovation. Michigan's two main assets this year are its rich history and its stadium renovation. A...

Two University of Nebraska Wrestlers Featured In Gay Photo Shoot Sans Tights
Uh oh. The two wrestlers, Paul Donahoe and Kenny Jordan, are pictured nude on a gay p0rn site, fratmen.tv. Donahoe was a national champion in the 125 pound weight class in 2007. He finished third last year. Jordan is a junior. Now the Univeristy of Nebraska is investigating. And you thought trying t...

Our President Loves the Olympics, So Should You
It's tomorrow in Beijing and the events are about to start up again. There are a few medals up for grabs, as well as some qualifyers. Americans Michael Phelps and Katie Hoff, as well as naughty Aussie Stephanie Rice are all making finals debuts tonight and the men's gymnasts will take a shot at the ...

Gamers and Playmates and Heroes! Oh my!
This year is the 20th anniversary of John Madden football and to commemorate this historic occasion, the folks at EA Sports are holding a "MaddenPalooza" event in Los Angeles. Deadspin has dispatched Michael Tunison to cover some of the sights, sounds, and overall geekiness. If you have any sugges...

Ohio University Lineman Wins $250k in Lottery
Mike Eynon, a 6'3 305 pound senior lineman, walked into a BP just off campus and emerged with a winning ticket. As befits life as an indentured servant to the NCAA, one of his first telephone calls was to the campus compliance officer to ensure that winning the award didn't violate NCAA rules. He go...

The Daily Dicky Comes to Kentucky
In the form of Kentucky's outspoken wide receiver Dicky Lyons, Jr.. You'll recall that Lyons spent SEC Media Days discussing his dreams about Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford trying to steal away his fiancee. Now he's providing daily video updates as Kentucky prepares for their opening game agai...

University of Colorado Announces Valet Bike Parking For Football Games
Surely you jest. The University of Colorado couldn't really—this has to be made up, right? You can't expect to beat or even compete with five of the top 14 teams in the country if your university community is focused on valet bike parking. Well, you can if you're the crazy uncle of the Big 12. Welc...

Georgia Football Players Celebrate Number 1 Ranking With Bar Brawl; Public Urination
You could totally see this coming. The Georgia summer semester ends on the same weekend that Georgia gets the number one ranking in the Coaches' Poll. And you expect college football players to behave themselves? Son, when were you born? Two Georgia players were treated at a hospital after being st...

Eric Montross is Paying Hush Money For John Edwards's Love Child?
Once a Tar Heel always a Tar Heel, I guess. Politics and sports make strange bedfellows. The John Edwards love-child affair hasn't really crossed over into the mainstream media because, honestly, I have no idea why it hasn't. Probably because most of the people who would be reporting on the matter ...

Top Party Schools in Country, Shockingly, Correspond With Top Athletic Programs Except For...Randolph-Macon?
Randolph-Macon College is in Ashland, Virginia. Chances are you've never heard of this school prior to the party school listings. Every other school in the top 20 at least plays D-1 sports. Here's the top 20. Yep, slotted right in there with Texas, Florida State, Ole Miss, Penn State, Georgia and We...

U Of F President Irked By Gators' Party School Honor
It must be difficult for any university president to respond to the news that the school they promote as a bastion of education, culture, and developing fine, upstanding human beings is designated as the nation's top-ranked party school. On one hand, you're grateful for the national exposure the sch...

Looking for Why Gators Are Dominant? It Starts In Erin Andrews' Bed
Because, you see, the team is successful because Erin has realized that if she strips the bed of all pillows and comforters then good things happen. And occasionally, for superstitious reasons, she has the other girls over for sex-toy slumber parties and they exchange lingerie tips and...this is to...

SEC Media Days Arrive: UT's Phil Fulmer Served with a Subpoena Upon Entrance
Ahh, SEC Football, so full of love and companionship. As the University of Tennessee coach arrived this morning to discuss the upcoming season he was met by a process server. The only man more hated in the state of Alabama than Phil Fulmer is Al Sharpton. Cue the Birmingham News: ...

The Official Communist Party Quick Travel Guide To The 2008 Beijing Olympics
Drew Magary's Balls Deep column runs every Thursday afternoon. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available for pre-order here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK....

Get Ready For British Humor Night With The West Michigan Whitecaps
Welcome to Minor Enterprise. But follow only if you are men of valor. For the entrance to this cave is guarded by a monster, a creature so foul and cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair ... therefore sweet knights if you may doubt your ...

Vegas Summer League Is A Fanboy's Wet Dream
Are you a fan of basketball? Do you enjoy traveling to Las Vegas? Do you appreciate young ladies of questionable legality traipsing around in tiny shirts that read "Where Amazing Happens" and very little else? Well then why the fuck would you miss the NBA's Vegas Summer League?...