um Page 169 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When Is The Best Time To Take A Dump?
Today, we’re talking about wallets, watching sports alone, asshole coaches, and more....
Who's Keeping The NHL Out Of Quebec City?
Go to a New York Islanders game at Barclays Center in Brooklyn, New York, and you will be treated to a relatively quiet evening. One whole end of the arena sits empty because it overhangs one of the nets, making it impossible to see the action from that vantage point. The rest of the arena isn’t lac...
Trump Administration Overturns Deal Making It Easier For Cubans To Play In MLB
For decades, every Cuban-born player in Major League Baseball arrived in the United States only at the end of a long and dangerous extralegal process. That process was, by its nature, run exclusively by and mostly for the benefit of an international collection of creeps, from violent criminal gangs...
Three Years After Resigning Over "Inappropriate Relationship," Tyler Summitt Hired As Former Player And Current Wife's Assistant
This morning, the Fairborn Skyhawks of Fairborn, Ohio announced that they had hired Brooklyn Summitt, née Brooklyn Pumroy, to be the school’s new girls’ basketball coach. One of her new assistant coaches will be her husband Tyler Summitt. ...
Arrogant Dickwad Umpire Shouts "I Can Do Anything I Want" After Goading A.J. Hinch Into An Ejection
In the top of the second inning of Wednesday night’s Astros-Rangers game, home plate umpire Ron Kulpa called a low strike on a pitch from Rangers starter Mike Minor. It was not Kulpa’s first controversial strike zone call of the evening, and it greatly displeased the Astros bench. Kulpa, a sensitive...
Donald Trump Is Never More Donald Trump Than When He's Cheating At Golf
“There are so many ways he just throws up all over golf,” Rick Reilly told The Ringer’s Bryan Curtis for a story that was sort of about Reilly’s active retirement and also about Reilly’s new book on President Donald Trump’s life of crime on the golf course. That book is called Commander In Cheat, an...
At Least If The Blue Jackets Miss The Playoffs It Won't Be <i>Because </i>Of This Goal
Columbus has an awful lot riding on making the playoffs, and the race for the East’s two wild card spots is so tight that every single goal has the potential to decide seasons. So if the Blue Jackets and their fans were dreading the possibility of an offseason spent bemoaning this fluke Boston goal ...
Universe Rewards Home Plate Umpire For Defending His Crew Mate By Directing A Fastball Into His Junk
This delightful baseball sequence begins with Cardinals third baseman Matt Carpenter leading off the top of the 11th inning against Pirates hurler Steven Brault. With the count at 2–2, Brault threw a breaking pitch down and away, and Carpenter appeared to check his swing. Third base umpire Jordan Ba...
How Much Longer Will Baseball Stadiums Be For Baseball Fans?
MLB’s attendance, you might have heard, was down last year, around four percent by season’s end. The league’s front office, represented by anthropomorphized wet blanket Rob Manfred, has operated under the assumption that pace of play is the issue, arguing that “putting the best entertainment product...
Trump Department Of Education Wants To Defund The Special Olympics
On Tuesday, Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos met with members of a House appropriations subcommittee to defend her department’s proposed budget for the next fiscal year. It was, like most of what happens in government, a ritualistic offering—the proposed budget is a proposal that reflects the admi...
The President Couldn't Help Being Weird At The Capitals' White House Visit
On Monday—a curiously long time after winning the Stanley Cup, given that the team in question didn’t need to wait for a road trip to Washington—the Capitals visited the White House. More notable was who didn’t make the trip....
The 7 Laws Of Vaportecture, Stadium Art's Fever Dream
For sports team owners seeking new stadiums or arenas—which is to say, for sports team owners—there are certain tools of the trade at their disposal for convincing fans and politicians to support (and pay for) a new building. They have economic impact studies, ideally compiled by friendly consultant...
The Blue Jackets Should Either Relax Or Panic<em></em>
This is a now-or-never final stretch for Artemi Panarin’s Columbus Blue Jackets, with at least a few of their key players on the way out after this season, and right now the team is seated on the “never” side of affairs. The Blue Jackets lost to the lowly Edmonton Oilers on Thursday night, which, co...
Hockey East Won't Discipline Anybody For Racist Remark Towards Providence Player
Hockey East’s investigation into an unspecifed racist comment that was made towards Providence forward Vimal Sukumaran during a game last Friday against Boston College has ended in a very unsatisfying way, as the conference says that, despite the “inappropriate language” used against Sukumaran, they...
Tottenham's Long Stadium Nightmare Is (Almost) Over
At long last, Tottenham Hotspur have a home. After years-long saga to get their new stadium ready for actual soccer, Spurs’ new grounds will be ready in time for an April 3 Premier League match-up against Crystal Palace, according to a statement put out by the club on Sunday:...
Auburn Buried Tennessee Under A Pile Of Threes And Stole A Win The SEC Tournament
The Auburn Tigers beat the Tennessee Volunteers 84-64 to win the SEC Tournament for the first time since 1985....
Angel Hernández, <em></em>Everyone's Least Favorite Umpire, Is Already Back On His Bullshit
Angel Hernández, arguably the most disliked umpire among active MLB players, has already shown on Friday that he’s in midseason form. Hernández ejected Astros manager A.J. Hinch just one pitch into the bottom of the first inning of his team’s game against the Cardinals. Hinch reportedly had to be re...
The Pistons Have Played Like Stepped-In Dog Shit For Two Straight Games
Just four days ago, the Detroit Pistons clobbered the Bulls 131-108 at home, extending what had been a surprisingly nice little run of games for such a terminally mediocre franchise. That win over the Bulls was Detroit’s 12th in 15 games, and they were starting to look like a team deserving of a pla...
Artemi Panarin Very Stupidly Got In A Fight With Charlie McAvoy
Of course, this is an incredibly dumb thing for Artemi Panarin to do as his all-in team tries to claw its way into the playoffs. If someone on the Blue Jackets is going to fight Bruins defenseman Charlie McAvoy, it better be someone disposable, just in case it goes horribly wrong a la Matt Dumba....
<em></em>Donald Trump Awards Donald Trump Trump's 20th Trump Golf Club Championship
According to people whose lives may well have depended upon it, the late North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il had an excellent golf game. One story told of Kim’s golf prowess crossed the demilitarized zone and become something of a minor meme: that Kim, while playing the first round of golf of his life...