united Page 162 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
David Moyes, On What We All Saw Coming: "I Really Didn't See It Coming"
Former Manchester United manager, laughingstock, and amateur golfer David Moyes has stayed pretty quiet since getting canned before last season's end. (Publically, at least. Don't come at him sideways at a wine bar.) Today, he spoke to the Guardian, expressing a frankly unbelievable level of naive...
Here's What I Learned Watching FIFA's Incredible Propaganda Movie
Recently, soccer fans all over the world were impressed to learn that United Passions, a FIFA-financed movie about how wonderful FIFA is starring Gérard Depardieu, Sam Neill, and Tim Roth, had pulled in $200,000 at the box office since it premiered at Cannes in May. This sum may be a bit less than t...
Little Man United Fan Flips Out Over Her Preschool's Blue Uniform
In the world of soccer, there are reds and there are blues. Sure, there are green and white and purple jerseys, too, but the great divide is between the reds and the blues. In the video above, one bawling little Manchester United fan shows just how deep these color allegiances run....
Looks Like The Manchester United Traveling Circus Might Really Happen
During the latter stages of last season, there were rumors that United might partake in a tour of the Middle East and Asia during the missing midweek Champions League fixtures that otherwise would've filled the schedule and coffers. It was funny enough to mention in passing, but too outlandish to be...
Wayne Rooney Gets Dumbest Red Card Ever
Manchester United are taking on West Ham today, and after captain Rooney and striker Robin van Persie goals put United up two after just 22 minutes, West Ham pulled one back eight minutes before half. In the second half, the visitors settled in and began to dominate play. We've seen this movie befor...
Watch Manchester United Fans Brawl With Guys Dressed Like Waldo
In one corner, a bunch of drunken oafs fresh off leaving a United match. In the other corner, a bunch of drunken oafs celebrating a bachelor party and wearing matching Where's Waldo? shirts and hats. It's the most England video there is. ...
Manchester United's Defenders Don't Actually Know How To Defend
Manchester United were supposed to play yesterday in England's League Cup. Instead, they were home chilling, because on August 26, they got curb stomped by third-division midtable side MK Dons. ...
Manchester United Dominate Leicester, End Up Getting Blown Out
You see that little guy up there? That's Filbert the Fox, Leicester City's mascot. Don't worry, he's feeling great. Though his club hosted the rich and famous Manchester United today, his boys managed to take down the giants. Those aren't tears of sadness, they're tears of mockery, directed at the...
Manchester United's Luke Shaw Is The Next Gareth Bale, Even If He's Not
This summer, Manchester United bought left back Luke Shaw from Southampton for £30 million. Luke Shaw is 19 years old. If you're not familiar with soccer's transfer fees, that is a staggering amount of money for a teenager. It's more than the fee paid for Wayne Rooney, another English talent of grea...
Is Manchester United's Newest Savior A Fraud?
Last summer, Colombian striker Radamel Falcao arrived in Monte Carlo as AS Monaco's new signing and savior from Atlético Madrid, wearing a jacket and shirt combination that all but summed up his brief time on the Côte d'Azur. With the beautiful French Riviera in the background, the salmon jacket, ...
Cute, Deluded Young Leeds Fan Thinks He Can Coach Team To European Cup
Little Zack Webb has already developed some pretty strong convictions in his seven years on Earth. One is that Leeds are tops. Another is that the club could be the best in the world. Most importantly, he knows he's the man to make it happen....
A Striker For You! Another For You!: Your Transfer Deadline Day Roundup
Another crazy transfer deadline has came and went, and after a couple tense hours of waiting, it appears most of the biggest moves, like Radamel Falcao to Manchester United, were squeezed under before the curtain fell. Here's a recap of the biggest moves completed yesterday:...
MK Dons Score Gorgeous Goal While Bossing Manchester United
Milton Keynes Dons of League One—that's the league below the league below the Premier League—put a goddamn hurting on Manchester United in a League Cup match today, beating them 4-0 to the delight of nearly everyone in the world. Here is the third and prettiest goal of the match, featuring some deft...
Mauro Zárate Drills Home Magnificent Volley Off The Deflection
West Ham United took a 1-0 lead on Crystal Palace today when Mauro Zárate—in his first start for a new squad—lined up a volley after a sky-high deflection of a shot from teammate Mark Noble....
The Sad Ballad Of The Short-Lived @TotallyManU
The tragedy of Totally Man U must be a gag. No one would leave their job and spend their money just to blast out news to Manchester United fans all day, right? Right?...
Something Disgusting Happened In Ashley Young's Mouth
It's hard to say exactly what this is that flies directly into Ashley Young's mouth—many on Twitter say it's bird shit, which should make you want to eat Clorox wipes for a week—but even if it's just human spit, it's equal parts amazing and gross. ...
West Ham Idiot Runs Length Of Pitch, Takes Free Kick For Spurs
An Idiot On The Field invaded the pitch at Upton Park today, and made the most of his time in the spotlight: he took a crucial free kick for the visiting Tottenham Hotspur....
This Isn't Your Club's Year: Our 2014-2015 Premier League Preview
Woohoo, soccer people. We're back....
Miralem Pjanic Scores 65-Yard Goal A Day After Hitting 50-Yard FG
AS Roma's Miralem Pjanic had a pretty solid couple of days in Denver. On Saturday, he scored the absurd goal you see above in a friendly against Manchester United at Sports Authority Field. United kept a clean sheet until the 75th minute, when Pjanic boomed a ball from behind midfield as goalkeepe...