us Page 1004 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rent a USC Song Girl for $150
The only catch is that you have to fill out a request form. Of course the form requires you to answer a few pressing questions. Such as, "What do you want the Song Girls to do?" I'm sure you can manage that. In fact, there's a good chance you were thinking of what you'd like the Song Girls to do, b...

Vince Young's Sausage Tastes Great
Why are you looking at me like that? When you throw 9 touchdowns and 18 interceptions in a season, it's important to branch out your business interests. Which is why Vince Young has gone into the sausage business. Yep, being a Titans fan is awesome. On a serious note, how much money can you make wi...

High Jumping and Vodka Don't Mix Well
Ivan Ukhov is a Russian high jumper. He's pictured above in the midst of a successful high jump. According to many reports, he's also a fan of Red Bull and vodka. No problem there. He'd be hugely popular at Rutgers. But when you combine Red Bull and vodka with a track competition? Well, it's not so...

Your Emeritus' Smattering Of NFL Predictions
When I was running this here site, I tried to do as few predictions as possible, because I have no idea what I'm talking about. That is to say: I know as much as everybody else. Sure, I could say something like, "I was talking to John Fox in practice the other day, and he feels really strongly abou...

You might remember when I told you about all the problems with MLB.com's iPhone application. Well, they issued a much-needed update to it over the weekend, and almost all the initial problems have been solved. It still needs a Reload button, but other than that, it's almost like a professional sport...

No Way Will The Cubs Blow It This Time ... Uh Oh
Time to worry: When your team has lost four straight at home during the stretch run of the division race. Time to really worry: When your manager says "If he can pitch, he'll pitch. If he can't, we'll put Sean Marshall in the rotation." Those words of wisdom were spoken by Lou Piniella, after Carlos...

Would You Let This Woman Handle Your Stub?
I don't know how you feel about Jean Hsu (Jean who?) but that broad knows how to get into a tennis tournament. Somehow, she and a friend scored front row seats to an Andy Roddick match. Yeah, it's the national championship of tennis, but Andy Roddick? I guess they they just have a penchant to see ov...


Whatever Happened to a Good Old Fashioned Headbutt?
Score one for the extraordinarily thin-skinned. A judge in Naples, Italy recently awarded 1500 Euro to a fan of the Napoli Football Club for "existential damages" he incurred while attending a match against Inter Milan. The cause of the damages? Banners. But not just any banners. Banners that made l...

Crisis Averted
You can rest easy, casual male tennis fans still reeling from the Ivanovic upset (C.M.T.F.S.R.F.T.I.U.s): Elena Dementieva and Jelena Jankovic are through to the next round of the U.S. Open. Dementieva easily advanced in straight sets over Anne Keothavang of...England? Really? Seems kind of Dutch t...

U.S. Open Update: Ivanovic Out, But Hot Girlfriend Boxes Intact
Dylan Stableford writes occasionally about tennis for Deadspin. It's called "Droppin' Deuce With Dylan Stableford." This week, he's at the U.S. Open, watching tennis and taking creepy pictures of Brooklyn Decker from afar. Heading into the first weekend of the Flushing fortnight, we've lost one sult...

NFL Season Preview: Tennessee Titans
We're less than two weeks away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Today: The Tennessee T...

LenDale White Thinks Ohio State Sucks
Fortunately for White, unlike former USC teammate Carson Palmer—who told an LA radio station he hated Ohio State and their fans and then was forced to issue an apology— he plays in Tennessee. Which means he could probably run for Governor and be elected on the "Ohio State Sucks" platform. So don't ...

College Football Previews: #2 USC
"JP is the founder of Pyle of List, where he toils alongside 3 men that are superior writers, passionate sports lovers and respected friends. He's a USC alum, college football enthusiast and Pac-10 apologist. He also contributes to National Lampoon's Zaz Report but isn't responsible for any of thei...

NFL Season Preview: Arizona Cardinals
We're less than two weeks away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Today: The Buzzsaw Tha...

UCLA Calls Out USC in Full-Page Los Angeles Times Ad
Give Rick Neuheisel credit, he's not dodging the competition. He's already announced he's making a run at snatching Snoop Dogg away from USC and now he's pointing in their direction in newsprint!. Who said papers were dead? Not to be outdone with ancient relics of communication trash talk, USC imme...

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Marques Slocum's F—k Lion
Presenting the final 2008 inductee to The Deadspin Hall Of Fame ... Marques Slocum's Fuck Lion. Final tally: 78.1 percent. Once again — for the third consecutive year — Barbaro has fallen short. Here are his numbers for the last three years: 2006: 31.1 percent. 2007: 74.6 percent. 2008: 73.7 percen...

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Isiah Thomas
Presenting the next 2008 inductee to The Deadspin Hall Of Fame ... Isiah Thomas. Final tally: 84.1 percent. Isiah becomes the first person to earn a spot in the Deadspin Hall of Fame and win a SHOTY. Congratulations, Isiah. You earned it. Oh, did you. (Plaque by the engaged Jim Cooke.)...

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Buzz Bissinger
Presenting the first 2008 inductee to The Deadspin Hall Of Fame ... Buzz Bissinger. Final tally: 83.3 percent. I congratulate Buzz on this honor. I do hope he signs his name, from now on, as "Buzz DHOF '08," like the ballplayers do. (Plaque by the engaged Jim Cooke.)...