us Page 1022 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Milwaukee's Tailgaters Highly Evolved In All Things Toilet-Related
Where have you publicly evacuated when confronted with an overactive beer-filled bladder and nary a port-o-potty in site to relieve yourself during tailgating? Some duck behind cars and unleash right on the asphalt; others use their empty beer bottles as rudimentary urine containers....

Your UCLA-Memphis Live Blog
Finally, the Rumpelstiltskin of the tournament can weave chalk into gold, unless Kevin Love rains full-court chest pass threes all game. John Caliperi and Ben Howland would like to reserve their respective Final Four fortunes of years past. But remember: Larry Brown looms above all. And that's fine...

Bill James's Steroid Accusations Have Higher Range Factor Than Canseco's
By now even most casual baseball fans know the story of Bill James. Baseball thought of stats one way, he thought of them another, using complex equations using the quadratic formula and integrals and grep. Easy enough. But perhaps Mr. James has another e=mc² up his sleeve when it comes to the way w...

Matt Leinart Is Just Asking For It Now
And once again our hero returns with an even more breathtaking lack of self-awareness. TheDirty.com comes through with another photograph that is sure to disappoint Cardinals' coach Ken Whisenhunt again. This time, possibly, forever....

Benny The Bull: Free At Last!
Displaying the kind of investigative moxie that could have kept us out of this whole Iraq mess, the Chicago Sun-Times dug into Thursday's Benny the Bull T-shirt assault story and discovered that Benny had been wrongly accused! On Thursday it was reported that Benny — the costumed mascot for the Bull...

Obama Really Just Wants To Be Dr. J
A couple of weeks ago, Barack Obama appeared on Philadelphia's 610 WIP sports radio station and made a somewhat controversial statement about his grandmother being a "typical white person," which got everybody all fired up. (Ironically? Most of them were typical white people.)...

Finally, Massholes Have Something to Celebrate
As we wait for the Final Four to finally kick off on Saturday, the gang at Storming the Floor are amusing themselves with the championship-like substance contained in the NIT and CBI post-season tournaments....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

President Bush's One Night Away From It All
President Bush is never more likable, engaging or, frankly, informed as he is when he's talking about baseball. He lights up, displaying a breadth of knowledge that, uh, we never sense when he's discussing the Al-Anbar Province. He threw out the first pitch at the new Nationals Stadium last night an...

Hipsters In Big Wheels — A Regressive Delight
Bring Your Own Big Wheel, an annual event for wacky funsters to relive the childhood they never left is typically held on San Francisco's winding Lombard Street. This year's event went down Easter Sunday on Potrero Hill, which The Backyard said is probably more treacherous. Not being from the Bay A...

WWE Goes Nipple-Free
Wrestlemania XXIV is this Sunday ONLY. ON. PAY. PER. VIEW. and though there will be many bare chested (but totally hetero!) galoots offending the eyes with their useless male nipples while doing their sports entertainment thing, someone decided that just wouldn't be aboveboard to have them all out t...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after voting in the most important election of this generation ... • Boxing: Junior middleweights, Kassim Ouma vs. Cornelius Bundrage, at Salamanca, N.Y. (9 p.m., ET). Junior middleweight; my favorite division. [ESPN2] • College basketball: NCAA Division I tournament, Midwest and South...

President Bush Would Never Associate With Such Unsavory Characters
The mainland Major League Baseball season kicks off Sunday night, with the Nationals opening their new stadium. President Bush is slated to throw out the first pitch. Usually, he throws it to the home team's starting catcher. Unfortunately for him, this year the home team starting catcher is all ov...

Um, Someone Tell The Italian Sausage That He's Doing It Wrong
Hey, they told me that there would be no food allowed on the ski lift. Thank you Home Run Derby, for making us laugh at costumed baseball mascots attempting winter sports once again....

Putting A Foot On WKU's Neck
Storming The Floor looks at last night's Sweet 16 action....

The One Lonely UCLA Fan
There's something we absolutely love about this picture. No matter how well your team's doing, no matter how much fun your friends are having at the game, no matter how young you are and no matter how full of possibilities the planet might seem ... sometimes, when you're having a bad day, you're ha...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while counting the spiritual wonders of the Jesus Cheeto ... • College basketball: OK, who had Louisville in the pool? Anyone? • NBA: Nene But The Brave ... Nuggets 118, Mavericks 105. • LSU quarterback Ryan Perrilloux off of double-secret probation, ready to spring forward (or is it...

Sweet 16 Pants Party: Xavier Vs. West Virginia
Xavier Musketeers (29-6) vs. West Virginia Mountaineers (26-10) When: Tonight, 7:10 p.m. Where: Phoenix...

Your NL Central "Preview"
OK, now before you start hollering, no, we did not pick the Cardinals to win the division. And yes, that's the first time that's happened since we started this here site....