us Page 939 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Man Masturbates In Toy Aisle To Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
According to police, William Black grabbed the SI mag at his local Walmart, walked to the toy aisle, rubbed one out, and wiped it on a plastic light saber. [The Smoking Gun]...
Tennis Has Its <em>Heidi</em> Moment, And Everyone Is Pissed
"This partnership will provide more tennis, to more people, in more ways than ever before," said the USTA's CEO in 2008 after signing a six-year ESPN deal. He was partially correct: I've never seen a tennis broadcast quite like yesterday's....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Shaquille O'Neal" Makes Out With Some Guy At A Party
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Diesel, Shaquille O'Neal....
Nadal Finally Wins His U.S. Open. Sucks For Us.
A prediction: Rafael Nadal will never win another U.S. Open....
Blackhawks Fans Swing Dancing To That One Annoying Song, Because Why Not
A bunch of Blackhawks fans finally decided to combine their team's insufferable goal-scored anthem with the Lindy Hop because when anyone thinks "middling Scottish rock song," they think "dance celebrating Charles Linbergh." [Puck Daddy]...
Bernard Pollard Tells Reggie Wayne Off
When he isn't maiming members of the Patriots, Bernard Pollard moonlights as one of the better safeties in the NFL. However, as Reggie Wayne learned yesterday, Pollard isn't doing any of this all that quietly. H/T Mike and Tim....
Oh Look, Someone Compared a South Carolina Win to 9/11 (Updated)
You gotta hand it to Doug Jolley of the illustrious GameCockAnthem.com. He captures what an early-season SEC loss must feel like....
Boston Guy Took His Gal to Providence to Meet OchoCinco But Didn't, So Now Chad's Cheap
jOHN dOE of Boston is none-too-happy with the artist formerly known as Chad Johnson. Here's what he emailed about it......
Boston Columnist Doth Question White Jesus' Free Ride, Pre-Kickoff Smiting Expected
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
How <em>Dare</em> You Paint Pro Basketball Players as "Bed-Hopping Womanisers"
Some upfront facts: Bruton and Loggins are Australian Hall of Fame "basketballers" and "spruik" is a synonym for "promote."...
Vera Zvonareva is a Youth-Prison Riot Fetishist's Wet Dream
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
For Your Viewing Pleasure: The Worst Mizzou Volleyball Team Rap Ever
The Missouri women's volleyball team's official "Spirit Group," VolleyZou, found an enterprising group of young men with Missouri apparel, a gold cart, a video camera, and lots of gumption and commissioned them to make this, whatever this is....
Have Your Way With Eli Manning
Wanna know a great way to spend a hungover Friday? How about side-by-side with Eli Manning! "All you need is an image of yourself and a few minutes," says this day-making Toyota website. (A-Rod is all "mm-hmm.") Let's play!...
Private Stache: Jimmy Connors And Chris Evert, Love-Love
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....
What Roger Federer Actually Said In That ESPN Interview
Earlier, we drew your attention to a minor hubbub over Roger Federer's interview with Pam Shriver, during which his audio cut out for several highly suspicious seconds. What could he have said, we wondered? Well, now we have an answer....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Toni Kukoc" Drums For Vampire Weekend
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Croatian Sensation, Toni Kukoc....
Stories That Don't Suck: USA Basketball's 12 Angry Men
From time to time, we'll select stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that we urge you to read for one reason or another. Today: The 1972 Olympic team, still bitter about losing to the Soviets....
Last Night's Winner: Mike Krzyzewski, Restarting The Cold War
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the revival of Soviet-American tensions, exacerbated by a little trash talking from Coach K at the FIBA World Championships. Duck and cover, kids...
You're With Me, Tom Friedman's Mustache
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Jason Kidd" Doublefists Dos Equis Cans At A Concert
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Jason Kidd....