us Page 974 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Best (Or Worst?) Customized Jerseys Of The Year
It really takes a lot of guts to buy (and wear) a gag jersey. You're basically paying $150 for a wearable punchline. Sometimes it works great and sometimes....well, they get sent to us and we make a gallery....

NFL Gets Brained By Its Own Study
The NFL is slowly coming around to the idea that football can cause significant cognitive damage to its participants. Previously, this view was held by only players, fans, neuroscientists and those members of Western civilization not on the NFL's payroll....

Lifting Weights Obsessively Helped Stafon Johnson Survive Nasty Weightlifting Accident
Dr. Gudata Hinika, trauma director at California Hospital Medical Center: "Had that been any one of us, meaning me, I would not have survived. His neck was so solid and so muscular, that actually helped maintain his airway." [LAT]...

Our Long National Nightmare Is Over: Reggie And Kim, Together Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Stafon Johnson's Prognosis Is Good
The USC tailback, hurt yesterday when a weight bar fell on his neck, underwent seven hours of throat surgery. He's in critical but stable condition. "We all feel a bit damaged today and injured," Pete Carroll said. [LA Times]...

USC Running Back In Horrific-Sounding Weight-Room Accident
"ESPN's Shell[e]y Smith is reporting USC RB Stafon Johnson has been taken to the hospital after a bar came down on his throat in the weight room. Johnson was coughing up blood." [CBS2]...

The Legend Of The Vest
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories...

Geiger! Let's Go! (Again)
Remember Colby Rasmus Girl? Of course you do. It's always playing in your head when you've had a long day and all I really want is to sleep but it's stuck in my brain...Well now there's a remix. [imeem]...

Wait, Someone Sort Of Likes Phil Mushnick?
Mediaite's Katie Baker gives what-for to Mushnick, the New York Post's sports media critic and insufferable morality pimp, but she also admits to giggling at his "meow-y media criticism." [Mediaite]...

Russian Dude Will Build Arena, Buy Nets, Annex New Jersey (UPDATE)
Russian basketboligarch Mikhail Prokhorov has gone from maybe chipping in a few dollars to build a new arena for the Nets to offering to take over the whole dang team—and maybe the entire NBA while he's at it....

Sports Will Make Detroit Happy Again, Sportswriters Continue To Claim
Oh, look. A sportswriter has parachuted into Detroit and found a hard-luck city with a shrinking tax base in the maw of a recession whose spirits nonetheless brighten because Brandon Inge just ran out a grounder to short. Yay!...

Teams Giving Refunds For Poor Play Could Bankrupt American Sports
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

We Didn't Have To Wait Long For USC's Meltdown This Year
Aaron Corp, the most hated man in University Park, shook off Saturday's abortion of a game by partying it up at a frat. Meanwhile, Pete Carroll's song of the day: "The Kids Aren't Alright." [Bleacher Report]...

Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
Look deeper into the Cardinals' 31-17 win on Sunday, as Larry Fitzgerald's brother did, and you'd realize too that Kurt Warner is an "OLD ASS MAN" who doesn't know how to run a team, 24-for-26 notwithstanding....

Houston Astros Fire Their "Manager"
With 13 games to go in their dismal season, the Astros—an alleged "base ball" team from Houston—have fired manager Cecil Cooper. In other news, Cecil Cooper was apparently managing the Astros this season! [Houston Chronicle]...

I'm Sure He Has The Same Heidi Watney Airbrush On The Side Of His Van
Well, maybe it's her uncle. A very proud, very creepy uncle. There's a chance of that, right? [Busted Coverage]...

It's Like Tim McCarver Talking, But To Music!
Don't wait until tomorrow morning to leave a voicemail for your boss saying you won't be coming in on Tuesday. That's the day Tim McCarver's new album drops....

Bustin' Ass
It's been awhile since we last brought you a photo of a terrified adolescent mutton-buster being tossed about by an unsettlingly placid-looking sheep. Our apologies....
