us Page 981 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jeff Garlin: “This Is The Longest Rape Has Ever Been A Topic For Anything I’ve Ever Discussed”
This week's Deadcast guest is "Curb Your Enthusiasm" co-star and producer Jeff Garlin (Listen here, iTunes here, buy Jeff's standup DVD here). We talk rape! Far more than Jeff prefers!...
Fixing The President's Throwing Motion
As you know, our commander-in-chief took the mound last night and did an excellent impression of a man trying to throw a party balloon. I asked some experts to evaluate Obama's mechanics and explain just what needed to be fixed....
The All-Star Game, Through The Eyes Of A Great Photographer
For the second consecutive year, I attended the Baseball All-Star parade. (Sorry: "Red Carpet Day.") This year, I even stuck around for the game. Witness my sad attempt at photography as we do an old school Road Trip....
Jason Whitlock Vs. Marty B In Racial Flame War ‘09: WHO YA GOT? (UPDATED)
Our favorite oozing pumpkin Jason Whitlock is forging an Enemies List not seen since the last days of Richard Nixon: Selena Roberts, Serena Williams, Hamstring Stretches, etc....
Buzz Bissinger's <em>3 Nights In August</em> To Become 2 Hours Wasted At Your Local Multiplex
That other baseball movie is flailing about, but the adaptation of 3 Nights In August, Bissinger's Moneyball diss track and paean to Tony La Russa and the manly virtues of lineup construction, is moving along nicely. The nerds can't win....
Why Pete Rose Didn't Ruin Ray Fosse's Career
No list of All-Star memories is complete without Pete Rose's decision to lower the boom on Ray Fosse, single-handedly destroying the young catcher's career in 1970. Unfortunately for the enemies of hustle, that's not quite how the story goes....
The Home Run Derby Will Rot Your Will To Live
As it turns out, Chris Berman might be the only person pitched at the right frequency for the Home Run Derby. After three hours of that — three hours! — I was almost afraid I didn't like baseball anymore....
Rinku Singh, The Body Electric
Singh, Pirates farmhand and vaguely neocolonial subject, struck out the only batter he faced Monday to become what's believed to be the first India-born player to win a professional baseball game in the States. [AP]...
Robert Lunn Leaves Austria With His Dignity (Mostly) Intact
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UConn. He graduated in 2008 and was playing professional football in Pörtschach, Austria. Sadly, he's back in the U.S. now, so this is his final column....
Oddly Enough, Married Athletes Are Still Foolin' Around
And here I thought Steve McNair's death would eradicate unfaithfulness among sports figures, the same way Charles Barkley's DUI was the last one of those to ever happen....
Mad Dog Goes Rabid, Needs To Be Put Down (SECOND UPDATE)
What can only be described as one of sports talk radio's most epic meltdowns happened two days ago. But since it happened on satellite radio, nobody knows a got-dang thing about it....
Your Awkward And Vaguely Racist Video of the Day: Black Olympics
If you are a connoisseur of sophisticated social satire in the tradition of Mark Twain and Jonathan Swift, prepare yourself for Martellus Bennett's latest opus. It is entitled-simply, eloquently-Black Olympics....
NBA Playoffs + Unrelated Movie = Genius
At best it's a blunt instrument to pound LAND OF THE LOST into every NBA fan's head. At worst it's a weird attempt at subliminal persuasion. But we can all agree that those NBA Playoffs/summer movie crosspromotions are unbelievably annoying....
This Week In Terrible Music: The Cowboys’ Nu Metal Band, Plus Chickenfoot
You may have heard that Cowboys' o-lineman Marc Colombo, Leonard Davis, and Cory Procter started their own metal band called Free Reign. Is their music as awful as you think it is? SURE IS!...
Nationals And Pirates Combine To Make Pretty Decent Baseball Team
Houston and Washington had some unfinished business yesterday, wrapping up a suspended game that took two months, two cities and three teams to complete. And the winning pitcher got the decision while taking a nap in Philadelphia....
Ochocinco's Forebearer Is... Justin Gimelstob?
Chad Ochocinco — né Johnson, he of no further introduction — and Justin Gimelstob, he of middling tennis stature, have more in common than what hits the eye. Actually, they really don't. But they both... like Twitter?...
Finding Mustachioed Men In St. Louis Will Win You All-Star Game Tickets
The All-Star Game is rife with "bare-faced mortals," so the American Mustache Institute — bless their whiskers — is sponsoring a so-called Stache Dash. Find playing cards of mustachioed legends, win bleacher seats. No facial hair necessary. [AMI]...
Not Just Another Drunken Rugby Pooping Incident
Australian Rugby has been laid low by scandal after a horrific "atrocity" committed by one its players. Specifically, 25-year-old Nate Myles, who—drunk, naked and locked out of his room—took a giant dump in a hotel hallway. The horror....
Russell Branyan's Power Loogie Deserves A Star
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
The Critic-Proofing Of Lance Armstrong
The ad you see here is the new Lance Armstrong spot for Nike, which would be merely standard-issue, inspiromatic marketing schlock if it didn't come so creepily close to suggesting that to criticize Lance now is to somehow enable cancer....