us Page 988 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

All Hail The Pathos Of The NBA Draft Lottery
This is a weekly column from Leitch....

Midwesterners Sure Do Love Their Lawn Mowin' T-Shirts
Irked by the loathsome "Zambrano mows my lawn" shirt found on one Cardinals fan a couple weeks ago, the Wrigley faithful come back with their own interpretation....

It's Hard To Type A Column With One Hand
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UCONN. He graduated in 2008 and is now playing professional football - in Portchach, Austria. He's graciously shared some of the things he's experienced so far....

James Harrison Snubs Obama, America
The Steelers' Silverback linebacker has caused many sports fans and journalists to gasp and mutter "you dumb bastard" under their breath after he scoffed at the White House invite....

Lakets. Rockers. Game 7 Open Thread.
Will Kobe take this series back? Will Ron Artest lick his neck? Will Luis Scola's swarthy musk be too much for the Lakers too handle? Find out which of these brave competitors will earn the right to be defeated by the Nuggets. [Yahoo]...

A NYC Subway Jacker Was Nabbed (Update)
Could 41-year-old Daniel Corrian be the man who rubbed against that poor girl on the D train? Either that, or there is a subway masturbation epidemic gripping the city. (Update: Not him!) [NYDN]...

Darius Miles Does Not Know How To Keep A Low Profile
Grizzlies forward Darius Miles was arrested yesterday after cops found marijuana in his car during a traffic stop, but some people are wondering if maybe the car itself is a little too conspicuous....

Orange Enthusiasts, Meet Your New Quarterback: Greg Paulus
Greg Paulus announced his destination for next year and has chosen...Syracuse. He will compete for the starting quarterback spot. One Duke sports editor took the time to say farewell....

Even Brian McNamee Has Become A Pro At Saying Nothing
Clemens' former trainer/abscess-causer gives a fresh "no comment." Also? A crazy fan had McNamee's autograph tattooed on his arm.[NYDN]...

Roger Clemens Will Win Back America One E-mail At A Time
It appears Roger Clemens wants to reach out and have an e-mail chat with some of the skeptical, heartbroken Astros fans. Where will he conduct this revealing online q-and-a session? Houstonist. com, of course....

Yahoo's Righteous Crusade To Purify College Sports
Yahoo, as noted earlier, has another story out in its long-running series on the generous redistributive polices of the USC athletic department. I hate to go all Jason Whitlock here, but, well ......

USC Athletics Not Entirely Above Board
Are you sitting down for this? It seems that USC—the Trojans!—might not be the most outstanding citizens in the world of college recruiting. Set your faces to stunned....

This Column Must Register With The Local Authorities
This is a weekly column from Leitch....

How 'Bout 'Dem Ladies Killing Their Husbands Over 'Dem Cowboys?
" An Allen woman accused of killing her husband said she stabbed him in the heart after he turned up the volume of a Dallas Cowboys game, according to media reports." [DMN]...

Roger Clemens (And Gene Grabowski) Try To Get This Crazy Train Back On Track
Roger Clemens emerged after a year of hibernation to appear on the "Mike and Mike" show to defend himself against some of the latest allegations about his steroid use. He didn't do so hot....

Sportswriting Declared Dead. Again.
Next month's Texas Monthly has a story about the death of sportswriting. It's official: Writing about the death of sportswriting is finally dead....

Just Give Your Car Keys To Aaron Brooks And He'll Park It For You
Either the Houston Rockets veterans had a little fun with Aaron Brooks this weekend or he forgot to bring his ventriloquist dummy to the post-game press conference....

The Deadspin I-Team Failed Its Badonkular Panamanian Cricket Mission
Luckily, there were others on the case. Cancel your flights to Panama. [TheRapUp]...

Rockets and Lakers: It's About To Get Nasty
After losing yet another starter, the Rockets are about to try to prove that they can win without Yao. If Ron Artest can keep himself from getting ejected, they might have a shot....
