v Page 2322 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Adrian Peterson Gets Off Probation 15 Months Early
Adrian Peterson was sentenced to two years probation after pleading guilty to misdemeanor reckless assault last November. That probation was suddenly cut short when Judge Kelly Case signed a motion to terminate the sentence last week, and the Montgomery County District Attorney isn’t too happy about...
Fernando Rodney Hides In Shrubbery, Might Actually Be An Elf
It hit 93 degrees in Denver today, and with the sun beating down through the thin Rockies air, Mariners closer Fernando Rodney decided to take a short siesta in the Swill Beer Field shrubbery:...
The NFL Would Like To Have A Little Talk With You About Sex
Does the NFL give its players sex advice? Of course it does! This is a league that tells its players how to tuck in their uniforms, has an approximately 600-word definition of what a catch is, and has its employees sign an “integrity of the game” honor code. So why not give its players The Talk?...
The Pac-12 Will Be Great, So Try To Stay Up Past Your Bedtime
Welcome to our college football conference previews, in which we will tell you what you need to know about various conferences, with an emphasis on watchability. First up is the Pac-12....
Classic Man: "Do Not Make Animal Noises At Women"
Frequently in this space, we will consult a new entry in the 1987 book The Modern Man’s Guide to Life to see how the advice therein has aged. Yesterday, we addressed what to do if you’re on a flight and the pilot dies; today, a word of advice re: interacting with the ladies....
Meryl Streep Rocks Out: <i>Ricki And The Flash</i> Could've Been Worse
Ricki and the Flash could’ve easily been yet another broad, obvious dysfunctional-family comedy. It’s right there in the setup: A middle-aged woman who years ago abandoned her buttoned-down Midwestern husband and kids to be a rock ’n’ roll star must now make amends, setting up a feel-good redemption...
Adrian Beltre Messes With Someone Else, For Once
Adrian Beltre’s frequently the target of his teammates’ antics, usually when he excels, but the Rangers third baseman had some fun as the instigator with Astros third base coach Gary Pettis Tuesday night....
Stun Gun-Wielding Ref Kicked In Face, KO'd By Blow To Back Of His Head
Soccer itself—and lower leagues especially—is prone to a kind of reckless, senseless violence not typically found in American sports. Toss in a heavy dose of Russians to the mix, and what is already often a caustic concoction turns downright toxic....
The Improbable Story Of Baseball's Wildest Comeback
It definitely ain’t over ‘til it’s over. The 116-win 2001 Seattle Mariners were one of the greatest teams, in any sport, to not win a championship. Led by Lou Piniella, the team was built for success: they boasted great pitching, an impeccable knack for getting on base (their .360 OBP was the highes...
Here Are The Emails That Helped Start Ballghazi
Like all great soap operas, it’s easy to lose track of where all the drama began. Here, thanks to the massive amount of paper filed by the NFL player’s union in federal court, is a piece of Ballghazi’s birth, first pointed out by the Boston Globe’s Ben Volin. It’s Jan. 17, 2015, and Indianapolis Col...
UConn's Bob Diaco Has A New Name For That Rivalry That Doesn't Exist
UConn football coach Bob Diaco introduced the world to a new rivalry, unilaterally dubbed the Civil Conflict, between the Huskies and the Central Florida Knights in June. It had a trophy and everything, and yet, no one bothered to tell UCF, or head coach George O’Leary. In fact, it wasn’t clear that...
If Only Eury Perez Were A Little Bit Taller
This is ostensibly a highlight reel of the four home runs the Giants hit against the Braves last night. For my money, however, the real star of this show is Braves left fielder Eury Perez:...
22 Years Ago Today, Nolan Ryan Beat The Shit Out Of Robin Ventura
You charge the mound because you’re furious. Because you want to hurt someone. You know you’ll be ejected, fined, suspended, but it’s all worth it for brief taste of revenge. You never do it thinking that it all might go horribly wrong, and you might wind up on the receiving end of one of the most i...
Kelby Tomlinson Gets His First MLB Hit, In Front Of His Wife
Kelby Tomlinson might not have prevented the Giants’ bullpen from blowing Monday night’s contest against the Braves, but the gangly 25-year-old rookie did his best with his only at-bat of the game....
A.J. Pierzynski Hit A Game-Tying Ninth-Inning Home Run And This Was Still The Best Thing He Did Last Night
The Braves took a wild 9-8 victory from the Giants with a two-run, 12th-inning walkoff shot from 30-year-old rookie Adonis Garcia, and they wouldn’t have made it that far without catcher A.J. Pierzynski’s ninth-inning, two-out, two-run bomb. But nothing was more fun than Pierzynski trying to frame a...
Vote In The Only College Football Poll That Matters—The Deadspin 25
Preseason polls are inherently stupid. But instead of wasting our time arguing with the power-mad beat writers of America, Deadspin proposes that it’s time for the right to determine college football’s best teams—or perhaps just its most interesting—to be taken away from the idiot writers and given ...
Some Guy Simulated 1,000 Seasons Into The Future In <i>Football Manager</i>
Everybody knows that the true joy of playing Football Manager is getting a decade or so into the future and seeing the new Messis and Ronaldos and Mourinhos and Guardiolas come and go. Reddit user “Lorf_Yimzo” took this to its logical conclusion, setting up a save in England, simulating into the yea...
Craig James Sues Fox Sports For Religious Discrimination
Befitting a man who espoused homophobic beliefs during a failed Senate run, believes himself to be Christian martyr, and has been dogged by allegations that he killed five hookers while at SMU, Craig James sued Fox Sports on Monday for religious discrimination, alleging that he was fired because of ...
Man In Randall Cunningham Jersey Beats Shit Out Of Hitchhiking Robot
Prayers up for hitchBOT, the hitchhiking robot that aspired to see the entire country via the kindness of strangers and made it as far as Philadelphia before getting curbstomped. Thanks to surveillance footage, we know how hitchBOT ended up as a pile of limbs: a brief clip shows a man in what appear...