w Page 2775 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Someone Has To Clean Up After Broadway's Creative Destruction
If you are familiar with the still boyishly handsome but extremely serious actor Ethan Hawke, you know that when stage directions state that a character he’s portraying onstage wields a golf club and then is “seen smashing typewriter methodically,” Hawke will absolutely be smashing the shit out of a...
F.A. Panel Says Wayne Hennessey Is Too Stupid To Have Done Nazi Salute
No one could have been more delighted to hear that Crystal Palace goalkeeper Wayne Hennessey is apparently a huge idiot than Wayne Hennessey himself. That’s because the F.A. panel tasked with investigating a photo in which the Welsh keeper appeared to have been making a Nazi salute gesture cited tha...
Russell Wilson Is Getting <i>Paid</i>
Russell Wilson is now the highest-paid player in NFL history. Just before the midnight (PDT) negotiating deadline Wilson’s camp had set with the Seahawks, the two sides agreed to an extension with a max length of four years and a max value of $140 million. Wilson had indeed tried to use his extraord...
Christian Yelich Has Been A Human Fireball Against The Cardinals
When Christian Yelich homered in the first four games of the season, all of which were against the St. Louis Cardinals, it was a fun curio—a hot streak carried over from the Brewers right fielder’s MVP season last year and a great player being great in an unusual way. Gabe Fernandez even wrote about...
The Warriors Deserved That
Tiger Woods sat back and said, “Well, what I did was pretty damned impressive, but that? Did you see THAT?” “That,” of course, was the most spectacular pipe job in NBA postseason history....
Robert Kraft Is Challenging The Florida Constitution To Keep You From Seeing Video Of His Hand Job
Can billions of dollars buy permission not to abide by a state constitution? Robert Kraft—owner of the New England Patriots, overseer of one of the greatest dynasties in modern NFL history, and self-styled humanitarian (if you ignore the coziness with Donald Trump) is betting yes. He hired some of t...
Put Lou Williams In The Hall Of Fame For What He Just Did To The Warriors
The L.A. Clippers pulled off an absurd comeback victory against the Golden State Warriors on Monday night, tying the first-round series at one-all by winning 135-131 after being down 94-63 in the third quarter. They were aided by a DeMarcus Cousins injury and a late Kevin Durant foul out, but the Cl...
DeMarcus Cousins Limps Out Of Game With Non-Contact Leg Injury
The Warriors are facing a scary situation early in their Game 2 battle against the Clippers, because DeMarcus Cousins had to head back through the tunnel after injuring his left leg while trying to make a steal....
Alex Ovechkin Just Dropped Andrei Svechnikov
The Carolina Hurricanes scored the first blow of their Game 3 matchup with the Capitals, getting a goal from Warren Foegele to go up 1-0. But Alex Ovechkin responded with a literal counterpunch—a whole bunch of them, in fact—to knock down Andrei Svechnikov....
There's A Lot Going On In This Jason Vargas Interview
Everyone’s eyes will naturally be drawn to the colonial-seeming fellow sliding into the background of Saturday’s postgame scrum for Mets pitcher Jason Vargas. Fine, that’s understandable. This blog will get to him shortly, but there are other things to appreciate here, too....
Did Michael Avenatti Fall For A Hoax Invoice Claiming That Nike Paid Zion Williamson's Mom?
Two weeks ago, before he was indicted in United States District Court for a wide variety of crimes, lawyer Michael Avenatti intimated that he had proof of Nike paying Zion Williamson to attend Duke, and doing so by paying Williamson’s mother for bogus consulting services. His threats were quite spe...
Michael Wilbon Will Not Pardon Golf Reruns Being Interrupted For Tornado Warnings
A system of intense and fast-moving thunderstorms swept across most of the eastern United States on Sunday. In Georgia, the incoming weather forced the fourth and final round of the weekend’s Masters golf tournament to start hours earlier than usual, so that the golfers and spectators could get off ...
New York Red Bulls' Kaku Blasts Ball Into A Fan's Face, Gets Sent Off
New York Red Bulls midfielder Kaku was sent off with a red card in the final moments of the Red Bulls’ 2-2 draw with Sporting Kansas City last night, after he kicked a ball in frustration and it struck a fan in the front row. The fan reportedly was left with a bloody face and needing medical attenti...
Finland Got Hosed And USA Won Gold
Team USA won its fifth straight women’s world hockey championship on Sunday, but not without controversy. (Important note: “Controversy” is the way to say it if you’re from the winning country and don’t want to admit the Americans got lucky and the Finns got robbed.)...
I Hope Giannis Makes These Cowards Weep On National Television
The start of the NBA playoffs always brings a series or two that, when seen on the schedule, elicits a collective cry from fans all over the world: “Can we just skip this one?” At first glance, the Bucks-Pistons series, which has the Eastern Conference’s No. 1 seed going against a Blake Griffin-less...
Un-Fucking-Real
He was finished. He was disgraced, hobbled, and eaten alive by the ravages of both fame and time. His story was over; it was simply a matter how clumsily it would end and how long it would take for that end to finally arrive....
Tiger Woods Just Won The Fucking Masters
The illustrious green jacket is back on the shoulders of Tiger Woods for the first time since 2005. After battling the likes of Dustin Johnson, Brooks Koepka and Xander Schauffele all day, Woods won the whole damn thing with a score of -13. As if everything that had been building to this moment wasn...
Caron Butler's New Hair Freaked Out His Kids
Caron Butler went on national television with a brand new head of hair on Saturday like nobody was going to notice, but people certainly did....
Frankly An Incredibly Good And Informative, Ah, Preview Of The 2019 NBA Playoffs, Part 2
Good day to you, hoop-sport friends! It’s time for the second part of our extremely on-time and thorough preview of the 2019 NBA playoffs. Today we’ll discuss the important topics of the first-round series that begin, uh, today: When and where they’re on TV, who’s in ‘em, how they got here, and of c...
The Beef Between Kevin Durant And Patrick Beverley Will Make This Inevitable Warriors Sweep Fun As Hell
When it came to the Warriors-Clippers series, the prevailing prediction seemed to be that the Clippers hardly had a snowball’s chance in hell of stealing at least one win from Golden State. However, the caveat to that pessimistic prediction was that Los Angeles could at least make things interesting...