w Page 2794 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kevin Knox's Dunk On Ben Simmons Left DeAndre Jordan Stupefied<em></em>
The Knicks as a franchise have completely packed it in for the rest of the season, but the electrifying rookie Kevin Knox has yet to get the tanking memo. In the second quarter of New York’s likely eventual loss against the 76ers, Knox took a bounce pass in stride from DeAndre Jordan as he sped into...
Japanese Sports Official Worries That Olympic Excitement Will Decrease Because Star Swimmer Was Diagnosed With Leukemia
This week Japanese swimming star Rikako Ikee announced that she has been diagnosed with leukemia and is starting treatment for the cancer. Ikee, 18, won six gold medals at the 2018 Asians and was expected to contend for several medals at the 2020 Olympics, which are being hosted in Tokyo....
The Westminster Dog Show Is The Past And Future Of Obsessive Dog Ownership<em></em>
I really don’t know anything about dogs despite having owned one for the past six years....
The Rest Of The Pelicans' Season Is Going To Be So Bleak
Now that he has to wait until this final third of the NBA season is over before he becomes a Laker or Celtic or something other than a Pelican, Anthony Davis is in the incredibly awkward position of having to play out the rest of the season alongside teammates he publicly dissed, in front of fans wh...
Prosecuting War Criminals Would Be A Lot Easier If Not For The United States' Resistance
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....
Report: Browns Owner Jimmy Haslam Is A Big Pouty Baby
Just two years into a four-year advertising deal with ESPN, Browns owner Jimmy Haslam is cutting it off, reportedly because he’s upset about a story ESPN published a few weeks ago about Haslam’s chaotic and unsuccessful ownership of the Cleveland Browns, the Sports Business Journal reported today. ...
John Elway Will Trade A Pick He Would've Screwed Up Anyway For Joe Flacco
Last season’s Denver Broncos went 6-10 with an unimpressive 30-year-old quarterback, putting them in position to pick in the top 10 for the third time in the last 27 years. Their poor record, formidable division, and need to actually rebuild would seem to make them a curious candidate to pay up for...
Wisconsin GOP Throws Successful Tantrum To Remove Colin Kaepernick From Black History Month Resolution
The Wisconsin Legislature voted on Tuesday to approve a resolution to honor key historical figures for Black History Month. The catch is that the original resolution—drafted by the Legislature’s Black Caucus, which is composed exclusively of Democrats—featured Milwaukee-born football player Colin Ka...
The Lakers Look A Delirious Mess
Gather now to review some things that happened in the Lakers’ 117-113 loss to the Hawks—yes, the 19-38 Hawks—last night....
Joel Embiid Ends Press Conference By Declaring That The Referees "Fucking Suck"
The freshly beefed-up Philadelphia 76ers faced a reeling and miserable Boston Celtics team in Philly last night, and thus had the opportunity to put a signature win on their increasingly hated rivals. Instead, they got beat 112-109 (despite the Celtics not having Kyrie Irving on the floor), and Joel...
Dan Snyder's Sleazy Stadium Scheme Is Crumbling Around Him
Dan Snyder’s underhanded scheme to plop a new home for his constitutionally corrupt and dysfunctional football team somewhere in the DC metropolitan area is suddenly in the deepest of shit. The DC power-move went to shit, and now the proposed site in Maryland, the acquisition of which would’ve requi...
Klay Thompson's Finger Briefly Points In Surprising New Direction After Gross Injury
Klay Thompson’s Tuesday night got off to a nauseating start, when his finger did something very gross in the first quarter of the Warriors’ home game against the Utah Jazz. Thompson was working against Donovan Mitchell when his hand appeared to smash into Mitchell’s side, and came away looking very ...
Kevin McHale Doesn't Realize He's On Air, Calls Someone A "Dickhead"
TNT rolled right through a few quiet seconds of a dead-ball in the first half of Tuesday night’s Celtics-76ers game, leaving the Players Only broadcast crew to chat through what might normally be filled by a relevant chyron and/or the small-talk skills of a professional play-by-play announcer. It se...
LSU Devastates Papa John With Tip-In Winner Against Kentucky
The LSU-Kentucky game at Rupp Arena was a thriller won by the Tigers in the final seconds, 73-71. The back-and-forth home stretch was engrossing for everyone who watched, not least of which was noted Kentucky fan and damp fratboy Papa John, who sat behind the UK bench and was deeply, visibly involve...
Papa John Joins Long And Noble Tradition Of Asshole Kentucky Bandwagoners
Disgraced pizza man Papa “John” Schnatter, having been ostracized by the University of Louisville after he was revealed as a racist and a horrible boss, has evidently abandoned all support for his formerly beloved Cardinals. Instead of continuing to root for Louisville despite the removal of his nam...
Naomi Osaka Ditched Her Coach After One Wildly Successful Year And No One Knows Why
Even accounting for the constantly whirling coaching carousel in professional tennis, the abrupt split of 21-year-old Naomi Osaka, fresh off two consecutive grand slam wins, and her coach of one year, Sascha Bajin, is puzzling—partly because it came weeks after her Australian Open win, and partly be...
Ole Miss Responds To Vacated Wins With A Giant Shrug<em></em>
Ole Miss football has been complete garbage for most of the last six years, at least according to the NCAA’s latest, useless sanctions. College football’s governing body finally handed down a ruling in a long disciplinary process against the Rebels, and the school now has to vacate 33 of the team’s ...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Dog Very Casually Completing An Agility Course
The purpose of the Westminster Dog Show’s agility course is to find the quickest dog, but that’s not why Winky the Bichon Frise participated. Beautiful, sweet Winky just wanted to take in the sights at a casual pace. For Winky, there is no timer but the timer of life. ...
NBA Refs Defend Bradley Beal's Comical, Insanely Obvious Travel
Late in the Wizards’ loss to the Pistons on Monday night, Bradley Beal took it to the rim. He gathered the ball, took his usual two steps, saw an enormous Blake Griffin looming in his airspace, and then ... just kept walking. As one does. Blake’s face on the replay says it all....