w Page 2835 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jim Harbaugh Forgot To Do The Assigned Reading On "Homecoming"
Homecoming: What does it mean? How does it make you feel? Can you eat it?...
Are The NHL's Mini-Dynasties Dead?
Until the Capitals broke through to win their first Cup, the Penguins, Blackhawks, and Kings dominated the NHL as the most effective triumvirate since Roman times. Instead of ending with stabbings and civil war, the modern NHL version collapsed for more mundane reasons involving salary caps and agin...
The Time Aretha Franklin Called Dave McKenna A Liar
Our beloved colleague Dave McKenna tells good stories. He’s done a lot of cool shit, met many weird people in weird ways, and had his run-ins with the law. And after selfishly squirreling all his stories away in Slack and our brains for years, we’ve realized we have a societal obligation to share....
Kyle Freeland Is A New Kind Of Rockies Pitcher
By the time last night’s interminable NL wild card game was over, your memories of the contributions made by Rockies starting pitcher Kyle Freeland, a second-year player throwing on three days rest, may have understandably faded. A quick refresher: 6.2 innings, four hits, one walk, six strikeouts, a...
A 2018–19 NHL Season Preview Of Every Team, From Best To Islanders
Hell yeah, hockey is back! After suffering through three months of sports that do not involve ice, and night after night of 90-degree temperatures with no A/C (though that one might just be me), the most beautiful and fun game in the world has returned to save you from five-hour ALDS games and lopsi...
Manhunt Is On For Aston Villa Fan Who Chucked A Cabbage At The Team's Manager
Yesterday’s Aston Villa-Preston match was a thriller that ultimately ended in tragedy for the Villans. Though it must have hurt to watch the ball bulge the back of their net three times in the disappointing 3-3 draw, the spheroid that arguably caused Villa the deepest psychic injury was the head of ...
Brave Rock Men Thwart Pesky Bear Children In NL Wild Card Slog
Some might remember Tuesday’s NL Wild Card game as classic, cagey postseason baseball. Others may describe it as a painfully slow and annoyingly long slog that lost all of its charm the very moment the ninth inning ended without one team ahead of the other. The luckiest among us will remember it as ...
Javier Baez And Nolan Arenado Share Warm Hug During Live Baseball Play
The Cubs and Rockies refuse to settle this goddamn National League Wild Card game, which is now in the 13th inning. The Cubs had a good chance to end it in the bottom of the 11th, after Javy Baez advanced to second on a sacrifice bunt and the Rock men elected to intentionally walk Daniel Murphy with...
Roger Goodell Thanks Toilet President For Tacking Canadian Super Bowl Ad Ruling Onto Trade Agreement
You may have to squint hard to follow along on this one: The commissioner of an American sports league thanked the American president for helping to overturn a Canadian regulatory rule that forced a Canadian broadcaster to show American advertisements during the Super Bowl, which is the signature Am...
No One Involved In Putting Malik Monk Into Hornets Preseason Game Notices He Isn't Wearing A Jersey
Things like this will not help to defeat the perception that second-year Hornets guard Malik Monk is destined to settle in as a J.R. Smith/Nick Young-style NBA eccentric: ...
Please Do Not Stalk Jordan Bell
Last September, Warriors then-rookie Jordan Bell shared a photo on Instagram from the balcony of his apartment in Oakland, which was sufficient for observant and/or obsessive Warriors fans to pinpoint exactly where he and his girlfriend were laying their heads. According to a report from The Mercury...
Everton's Richarlison Came Up With The Most Embarrassing Penalty Kick Of The Year
Southampton beat Everton in the penalty kicks in third round of the EFL Cup this afternoon. This was in large part thanks to Everton forward Richarlison, who tried an ill-advised Neymar impression, short-circuited, and sent his penalty over the cross bar. ...
The <i>Atlantic</i> Follows LeBron's Lead By Hiring Jemele Hill To Talk About Sports And Politics
In a Monday article in the Hollywood Reporter by James Andrew Miller, a man who at all times knows what’s going on at ESPN precisely an hour after anyone cares, former ESPN personality Jemele Hill officially announced her plans for the future. Seeing as the chickenshits who run her old shop have bee...
Ass Team Of The Week: Do Not Ever Feel That You Must Respect The Dolphins
This is my favorite part of the NFL season, in part because I get a certain thrill out of watching teams that roar off to surprisingly hot starts being put ruthlessly back into their places. I feel like I’ve lived through seven or eight NFL seasons that began with, like, the Buffalo Bills going 3-0,...
Maybe Kobe Bryant Didn't Flinch Because He Had No Reason To
On March 7, 2010, the Church of Kobestan found its holy sacrament in a Lakers-Magic regular-season game. Sports goblin Matt Barnes was inbounding the ball on the right sideline. He faked a pass directly into Kobe Bryant’s face and Kobe Bryant—he of the hyper-competitive, killer-instinct mentality, t...
<i>WWE Raw</i> Segment Goes Off The Rails When Seattle Crowd Won’t Stop Booing SuperSonics Joke
Denigrating the city in which an event is being held is one of the oldest and most reliable ways for a pro wrestler to get heat. It’s probably pretty cheap, honestly, but who cares. It’s easy to rip on a city’s sports teams, but there’s a reason wrestlers still do it: It generally works....
Ron Baker Sucked A Contact Lens And Then Put It Right In His Damn Eye<em></em>
Ron Baker played 17 mostly second-half minutes in Monday night’s Knicks preseason game, which went to overtime. It was in overtime, with just under a minute left, when Baker was whacked in the face by Wizards rookie Troy Brown and had his contact lens dislodged. Lacking a few drops of nice clean sal...
Markieff Morris's Bad Temper Is In Mid-Season Form
My friends, the Morris twins are extremely back on their bullshit. Last week Marcus Morris took the bait when Tristan Thompson ran his mouth about the LeBron-less Cavs still being the team to beat in the Eastern Conference. Also last week Markieff Morris felt it sensible to declare that the Boston C...
Report: Former NBA Try-Hard Chris Dudley Once Allegedly Smashed A Pint Glass On Someone's Head While Defending Brett Kavanaugh
Hopeless free-throw shooter and failed gubernatorial candidate Chris Dudley was pals and drinking buddies with Brett Kavanaugh when the two attended Yale together from 1983 to 1987. Where young Brett tried and failed to make the men’s basketball team, Dudley was the team’s star center and went on to...