w Page 2864 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bill Simmons Gets New Contract At HBO
Nearly three years to the day since since HBO first announced it was hiring Bill Simmons, the network has revealed its decision to keep the Sports Guy on board for another few years....
![It Was A Miserable Night For Gary Sanchez [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ihmqpyutr7w1rczpbpff.jpg)
It Was A Miserable Night For Gary Sanchez [Update]
Yankees catcher Gary Sanchez is not a complete player, but his offensive skills more than make up for for his questionable defense and occasionally suspect effort. There’s a reason he was an all-star last year and rookie of the year runner-up the year before that. His bat is a beast, and the Yankees...

Jake Bauers Scores From Second On Passed Ball Thanks To Just The Sleepiest Yankees Defensive Effort
Jake Bauers socked a three-run dinger in the fifth inning tonight against the Yankees. That’s cool. It’s cool to sock dingers, especially against the abominable Yankees. But Bauers’s best highlight from Monday night came in the bottom of the first inning, when he scored from second base on a passed ...

Iowa Football Player Arrested For Foolishly Thinking The Police Want Drunk Students To Get Home Safely<em></em>
Iowa Hawkeyes defensive lineman Brady Reiff was arrested Saturday morning after thinking that a police car was a cab. Yeah right, like campus police would ever help a student who had too much to drink!...

How Is This Shit Legal
This past spring, Michael Ferro resigned as chairman of publicly traded media-looting hell-company Tronc, Inc., just ahead of the publication of sexual harassment allegations against him. As a parting gift, Tronc paid him $15 million, voluntarily bundling up the total value of a three-year consultin...

How I Became A Wizard, By Dwight Howard, Age 7
Last year, the Washington Wizards underperformed both out of sheer ingrained habit and because some of the most important people on the team just absolutely fucking hated some of the other most important people on the team. On Monday, the team introduced Dwight Howard, the veteran big man that the t...

Larry Fedora's Football Crusade Is About Culture War, Not Science
A well-respected neuropsychologist once told me he thought the media was getting the concussion stuff all wrong. The headlines are all bad, he lamented, all the “Football is killing kids” doom-and-gloom stuff. His entire professional life, he reminded me, had been dedicated to treating concussions, ...

Wallace, The Good And Humble Mule, Defeats Fancy Dressage Horses At Their Own Game
Wallace is an 11-year-old mule who used to annoy Irish villagers by eating their flowers. After a lengthy battle over his right to compete in dressage, he is now a winner and hero to common beasts....

Dirks Nowitzki, Ranked
Alex Kennedy of HoopsHype has posted some excellent videos that track the evolution of specific player avatars in NBA video games over the last two decades. By far the most cursed sequence is Dirk Nowitzki’s. If you were expecting a steady, linear progression from “Not Dirk” to “Okay that’s Dirk” as...

Nationals Executive Has To Resort To Crowdfunding For Leukemia Treatment
Doug Harris, the Washington Nationals’ assistant GM and vice president of player personnel, holds a significant position in the organization—and yet, even an MLB team executive has to resort to asking the public to help cover his medical costs....

The <i>New York Daily News</i>' Sports Staff Has Been Gutted
The parent company of the New York Daily News reduced the 99 year-old tabloid’s newsroom staff by approximately 50 percent on Monday, and the sports department was especially hard hit. Per multiple reports, a sports staff of roughly 35 people was reduced to nine, including just five writers....

Ryan Lochte Suspended A Year Over Incredible Instagram Self-Own
The United States Anti-Doping Agency announced this morning that jolly bro airhead Ryan Lochte would be suspended for 14 months for “his use of a prohibited method.” As the language of USADA’s release hints at, Lochte’s is not a normal doping violation, which is not surprising since Lochte is not a ...

Liverpool's B-Team Came To America To Get Smacked Around By Christian Pulisic
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic willed Borussia Dortmund to a 3-1 victory over Liverpool in the International Champions Cup on Sunday, in front of 55,447 of his countrymen in Charlotte. The 19-year-old subbed in at halftime with his team down 1-0 and promptly took the game over. ...

Josh Gordon Will Miss The Start Of Training Camp For Unclear Reasons
Browns wide receiver Josh Gordon, who has spent the majority of his NFL career suspended for violating the league’s substance abuse policy, looked all set to start the 2018 season with a clean slate. This morning, however, he released this worrisome statement indicating that he will not be with the ...

Masa Saito Was A Great Wrestler And Half Of Pro Wrestling's Most Famous Arrest
Masanori “Masa” Saito, known as Mr. Saito to a generation of American wrestling fans, passed away at the age of 76 last weekend following a long struggle with Parkinson’s disease. An Olympic freestyle wrestler in 1964, Saito was a legendarily hard man and among the most universally respected people ...

Hernan Perez Plunked A Batter With The Softest Pitch You'll Ever See
The Brewers lost to the Dodgers 11-2 in nine innings on Sunday, but they stopped trying to win in the seventh, when utility man Hernan Perez went to the mound to throw two innings of relief. Perez, one of two Milwaukee position players to try their luck at hurling in the game, acquitted himself nice...

This Is How It Feels To Get Whacked By A Tiger Woods Golf Ball
Tiger Woods’ hopes of winning British Open championship came to end at the same time as one fan’s hopes of leaving Carnoustie without any bruises. With Tiger in sole position of the lead on the 11th hole, his second shot took a wrong turn somewhere in the sky and smacked a gallery member to the gr...

Just When You Think We've Reached Peak Mets, Noah Syndergaard Comes Down With "Hand, Foot, And Mouth Disease"
The Mets have spent an MLB-high $39.5 million on players on the disabled list in 2018, almost $2 million more than the next highest team on the list, and a full $12 million more than the third highest. I am going to guess the dollars they spend on Noah Syndergaard’s new ailment are the weirdest they...

Mesut Özil Quits International Soccer In Letter Decrying Racism And Unfair Double Standards
Mesut Özil retired from German international soccer Sunday, in a lengthy statement released on Twitter. Özil says the fallout from a photo he took with Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan in May lays bare a kind of racism he’s subjected to as a German with Turkish heritage, and that “enough is en...
