w Page 2880 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The U.S. Open Sucks And Is Dumb
A fun thing about Tommy Fleetwood’s final round at the U.S. Open Sunday—apart from the fact that he looks distractingly like Kenny Loggins circa 1981—is that he made birdies. Lots of them! So many, in fact, that he finished with a 63 on Sunday, just one stroke away from a U.S. Open record. Fleetwood...

The Nationals Offense Is Junk, But They're Mighty Fun On The Bases
The Nationals are depressing. After another disappointing loss Sunday afternoon they’re a ho-hum 37-31, having just been swept by the crummy and forgettable Toronto Blue Jays. They can’t hit the damn ball: they’re 10th in the National League in runs; they’re a miserable 11th in on-base percentage; n...

Brazil Continue Trend Of Underperforming Favorites, Draw With Switzerland
It turns out Philippe Coutinho’s monster goal in the first half of Brazil-Switzerland was not a harbinger of things to come. Brazil had about a 20 minute stretch of transcendent, dominant play, oriented more or less around Coutinho’s golazo, but spent most of the rest of the match squandering posses...

Philippe Coutinho Rips A Mighty Golazo To Put Brazil Ahead Of Switzerland
Mexico’s goal against Germany was satisfying, with the tidal motion of action suddenly surging the opposite way, and clean and purposeful passing, and a slick little first touch move followed by a sharp little strike. Lovely. But give me this here goal, from Philippe Coutinho in the 20th minute of t...

Mexico Upset Defending Champs In Germany's First World Cup Opener Loss Since 1982
Defending World Cup champs Germany were upset in their opener Sunday by a gutsy and tough-as-nails Mexico side, 1-0. There have been some surprising results in the tournament so far—Iceland drawing Argentina, Portugal drawing Spain—but this is the first holy shit upset....

The Orioles Finally, Mercifully Shelved Chris Davis
It appears the Orioles will not, in fact, let Chris Davis have the worst season in baseball history. Davis hasn’t played this week, and Friday night Orioles manager Buck Showalter reportedly indicated there’s no timetable for his return. This news is less happy than, say, news of Davis breaking out ...

Beer For Herbs Calls Itself "Lebron Tears"
An undeniable spoil of victory is the unassailable right to talk mad shit about your vanquished foes, forever, no matter their prominence nor how splendidly they performed. The Warriors are very good at this, as in the case of Draymond Green using t-shirts to mock LeBron James after each of the last...

USGA Says It "Deeply Regrets" Violent Sex Commentary On U.S. Open Broadcast
The USGA is apologizing for Fox Sports’s U.S. Open broadcast yesterday, which featured two men talking about violent sex:...

Germany Aren't Very German, But They Are Still Amazing Anyway
National identities in soccer are real. Mostly they emerge from the styles of play and the youth coaching methods that predominate in any given country’s soccer setup, and the values those styles and methods reflect. There is a reason why Brazil are almost always led by graceful and expressive attac...
![Cheatin' Phil Mickelson Melting Down At The U.S. Open [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/vjykjo3akcwxchpgfwys.gif)
Cheatin' Phil Mickelson Melting Down At The U.S. Open [UPDATE]
Phil Mickelson was already ten-over at the U.S. Open before putting up a ten-spot on the par-4 13th thanks to some putt-putt style cheatery....

Scottish Golf Course, To U.S. Open's Windy Conditions: "Hold My Beer"
This video is a couple days old, but it shows the, um, windy conditions at Gullane Golf Club, scheduled venue of next month’s Scottish Open. Lotta wind going on here. Big wind. Huge, huge wind....
![Icelandic TV Announcer Loses Mind Over Messi PK Stop [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Icelandic TV Announcer Loses Mind Over Messi PK Stop [UPDATE]
A penalty kick that ought to have given Argentina a 2-1 lead on Iceland in their World Cup match today in Moscow became electric when Hannes Halldórsson turned away Lionel Messi, prompting an absolute explosion of emotion from the Icelandic TV announcer. We’re not quite sure how he still has a voice...

Prosecutor: Kellen Winslow Jr. Threatened To Murder Women After He Raped Them
Kellen Winslow Jr. was arraigned today in a San Diego court on a list of charges that included forcible rape, sodomy by use of force, and kidnapping. Court documents and a prosecutor also provided more details about what the former NFL tight end is accused of doing to multiple women. ...

(Almost) Everything You Need To Know About World Cup Group H, In (Almost) One Minute
The 2018 World Cup has now commenced. Just because the USMNT blows and didn’t make the tournament, that’s no reason for you not to pay attention to the best sporting event on the planet. Here’s everything you absolutely must know about Group H, all in one neat little video....

(Almost) Everything You Need To Know About World Cup Group G, In (Almost) One Minute<em></em>
The 2018 World Cup has now commenced. Just because the USMNT blows and didn’t make the tournament, that’s no reason for you not to pay attention to the best sporting event on the planet. Here’s everything you absolutely must know about Group G, all in one neat little video....

Cristiano Ronaldo Caps Incredible Game With Incredible Hat-Trick Free-Kick Goal
Cristiano Ronaldo just played one of the best games of his life. He was outstanding throughout today’s Portugal-Spain match, holding up play like a champ, giving life to numerous counterattacks with ingenious flicks and passes, and, oh yeah, scoring three goddamn goals in what ended as a 3-3 tie. Hi...

BronnyWatch: NBA Suggests One-And-Done Could Be Out As Soon As 2021
Welcome to BronnyWatch, where we track the potential NBA destinations for LeBron James Jr. ...


Ugly Boner Gifts Ronaldo His Second Goal Of The World Cup
A pretty goofy first half between Portugal and Spain ended with a huge momentum swing for Portugal thanks to a giant boner from Spanish goalie David de Gea, normally one of the best shot stoppers in the world....

Fox U.S. Open Broadcast Features Two Dudes Talkin' About Fuckin'
“We were fucking so hard and I head-butted her in the head.”...