w Page 4760 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here Are Both Of Last Night's 2OT Cockpunches
Playoff hockey overtime might be the single greatest thing in the sports world — assuming your team isn't involved. Then it's a war of nail-biting, heart-stopping attrition, destined to end in glory and highlight compilations for one side, and wondering why you even bothered staying up late for th...
Phil Jackson's Zenergy Lulled At Least One Person To Sleep In L.A. Last Night
Your morning roundup for April 21, the day after McDonald's "National Hiring Day" in Cleveland got real. Real violent. Like, spitting in faces and hitting people with cars violent....
Ray Lewis Went To A Small North Carolina College To Talk About Spirits, Thunder, Cards And Whatnot
Tipster Jon R. reports that Ray Lewis "made an impromptu visit to Elon University for their spring football game last week and gave a very powerful speech. ... The game was actually postponed due to thunderstorms." Story moral: God hates people who listen to Ray Lewis giving very powerful speeches...
The Lady Who Yelled At Cops To Stop Beating, Tasing The Patriotic Pirates Fan Was Fined $1,000
Remember the clearly patriotic Pirates fan who got billy clubbed and Tased at PNC Park earlier this month? Of course you do, but here's a link to it anyway. Dude's name is Scott Ashley. He's 40, from Friendship, but isn't due in court until May 25 to face charges of harassment, public drunkenness,...
Holy Shit, This Guy From Arizona Really Might Not Have A Mouth
A Phoenix New Times story, headlined "Mouthless Meth Salesman Busted For Slangin' Meth, Keeping Unauthorized Shotgun Next To Bed," fails to answer one very important question: If Alan John Shepard doesn't actually have a jaw and/or mouth, what happened to it?...
We Are All Dave McKenna LXXV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit find its way into the wood chipper....
Woody Durham, The Vin Scully Of North Carolina: An Appreciation
One of Tobacco Road basketball's lesser-touted but nonetheless enduring traditions is the hatred at all four schools of television announcing. Raycom or ESPN, Dan Bonner or Mike Patrick, Dick Vitale or, especially, the execrable Billy Packer — depending on your household, they're all either utter...
MLB Won't Let Us Show You Travis Snider Breaking His Bat Over His Knee, So Here's A Fucking Drawing I Did Instead
Travis Snider struck out with the bases loaded in the sixth against the Yankees yesterday and Bo Jacksoned his bat in two. It was pretty cool, especially considering that Snider went on to win the game with a two-out double in the 10th. As you know, we can't show you the video, lest we step on MLB's...
Tim Donaghy Has A Theory On Danny Crawford And The Mavericks
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: what Donaghy thinks of the refereeing so far in these playoffs. Cubes won't like this one....
The Restless Mind Of C.J. Wilson, The Rangers' Straight-Edge, Tolkien-Reading Enemy Of MLB Douchebags
The following is excerpted from Curtis's cover story in the May issue of Texas Monthly about the Rangers — "an AA meeting in spikes," he writes....
What Does The Splinter Group Of Players Mean For The Lockout?
A group about 70 less rich, less famous NFL players are about to hire their own law firm to get them a seat at the bargaining table. What does this mean? Like everything else in tightlipped lockout land, who the fuck knows? But here's our best interpretation....
Kurt Warner Talks Dancing, Theodicy On His <em>Good Day L.A.</em> Interview
Of all places for Kurt Warner to get backed up against a wall, and then repeatedly and viciously head-butted about his religion, a Good Day L.A. interview was not our first guess. But yesterday, the former NFL quarterback and born-again Christian joined Jillian Reynolds, Steve Edwards, and Dorothy...
Police Somehow Find 6-Foot-9, 300-Pound Former NBA Player Who Allegedly Pistol-Whipped A Guy At A BBQ
The Anne Arundel County (Maryland) cops on Tuesday arrested former NBA big big man Oliver Miller, who allegedly pistol-whipped a dude with a Glock at a barbeque on Sunday. Miller fled the scene in his 2003 BMW X5 with several buckets of coleslaw and the secret recipe for a vinegar-based sauce....
<i>NYDN</i>: "Blah blah blah blah rain blah blah blah Niese blah blah Astros blah blah Mets got spanked."
New York Daily News scribe Andy Martino has written a game story that speaks for every fan of the 2011 Mets. What it lacks in rhetorical fluency it makes up for in, uh, truth. This isn't an editing error, although it may look that way at first blush. The Mets have reached the summit of suck....
Jackass Columnist Blames Pitcher For Choosing Childbirth Over Pitching
I'm not a local, so I don't know how much of Dallas Observer columnist Richie Whitt's schtick might be part of his on-air radio personality, but I'm still going to bring your attention to this gem of a column:...
Star Of <i>Fred Claus</i> Points And Laughs At Four-Time NHL All-Star
Your morning roundup for April 20, the day we started buying all of our heroin on Craigslist....
This Is How Four Guys Who Can't Play Basketball Let New York Down
Well, the Knicks lost to the Celtics earlier this evening, 96-93, which puts Stat, Melo, and their motley gang of invalids in a 2-0 hole with the series headed back to New York....
Over At CNN, ESPN's LZ Granderson Takes Aim At American Culture, Whore-Friendly Panties
ESPN.com/ESPN Mag columnist LZ Granderson joined CNN last week, apparently writing a weekly column in addition to his ESPN gig. Why would Granderson need another online platform, one might wonder, especially since his Page 2 pieces often tackle stuff other columnists won't?...
With Apologies To Jack Edwards, This Junior Hockey League Announcer Is The Homer To End All Homers
After reading our post about Jack Edwards's deliciously biased Bruins coverage, reader Kenn sent us this excellent clip from a junior hockey league in Texas. In it, the announcer completely loses his shit, tries to calm himself down, and then loses his shit all over again. It sounds like he's cove...
We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit puts down the gun and fights like a man....