w Page 5008 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Summer Of Our Discontent
Pretty soon, this will all be over. No more loping around idly on Saturdays and Sundays. No more wandering outside and soaking in the sun. No more posts about the Tomatina. It's almost football season!...

Watch Out For Your Tires
Who said nothing was going on this weekend? There is live golf right now, and it's on television! They might even show the parking lot, where Y.E. Woods and Tiger Yang have adjacent spots. Awkward. [Star-Ledger]...

Don't You Dare Call His Tebowness A Student-Athlete
It's deliciously ironic when a flack greets reporters at a press conference and asks for questions for the so-called student-athletes, a descriptor about as accurate as calling Tim Tebow mortal. Hopefully, Tebow will soon rid the world of this nonsense....

And This Is How Ketchup Is Made
It's the annual Tomatina, when Spanish revelers congregate and, well, throw tomatoes at each other. It looks as fruity as it sounds, but at least you'll look bloodier than you would running with the bulls. [WSJ Genius]...

Colt McCoy Sheds His Third Eyebrow
The grizzly folks at the AMI are none too tickled about the Texas quarterback's fumble, comparing it to a Greek tragedy. Imagine if Tim Tebow, in his corn-fed handsomeness, shaved a mustache. I have. It's called the apocalypse. [AMI]...

Muppets Win Again
Life is all about priorities, compromises and compromising priorities, which is why the WNBA's Atlanta Dream — ever heard of 'em? — may not be able to play at home if they make the playoffs. They're being bumped by puppets....

Every Poll Has Its Thorns
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Blazer Girl In The Land Of The Plastic Coyote
These are the notorious decoy coyotes of ESPN, propped up by The Worldwide Leader In Bird Control to scare off nesting geese and captured here in terrifying synthetic predation, like Steve Phillips in those fake press conferences....

George Steinbrenner Will Steal Your Business Ideas
A disgruntled former MSG exec says he designed the blueprint for YES network, which George promptly stole to build his $3 billion television empire. So naturally he's suing for due credit, to the tune of $23 million....

Playing In Little League World Series Gives You Serious Game
Obviously, reaching the Little League World Series has its perks—new uniforms, free licorice, uncomfortable silences with sportscasters—but there is one greatly overlooked benefit to reaching the heights of pre-teen athletic stardom: Hot and cold running chicks....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Citi Field
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The New York Mets' Citi Field....

The Cowboys Scoreboard Punter Drinking Game
You don't need a reason to drink this weekend, but you may need a reason to watch a 49ers-Cowboys preseason game that doesn't include "it was the only thing the sheriff would let me watch from the holding cell."...

The One With A Drunk Gunslinger And More Irrational Anger
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Player-Coach Leads Team To Championship While Pregnant
Sky Blue FC won the first Women's Professional Soccer League championship last weekend, but didn't find out until the champagne celebration that their coach-slash-captain, Christie Rampone, is three months pregnant. No, she didn't play barefoot....

You Can Be The Proud Owner Of Onterrio Smith's Whizzinator
It's the perfect gift for the man in your life who routinely fails drug tests. It could also be used as a funny gag gift for a 40th birthday or a Christmas tree ornament. [RandBall]...

Why Your Team Sucks: Denver Broncos
Some people are fans of the Denver Broncos. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Denver Broncos. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: St. Louis Rams
Some people are fans of the St. Louis Rams. But many, many more people, like reader Adam S. are NOT fans of the St. Louis Rams. Adam's 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. ...

It Looks Like The Vick Jerseys Are On Back Order
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

New Jersey Golf Course Is A Dump. Literally.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Most Brilliant Thing You'll See All Night
This is a couple weeks old, but well worth the wait. Let's make this girl a star....