we Page 207 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Umpire Joe West Sues Retired Catcher Paul Lo Duca Over Bribery Allegations
Umpire Joe West has had his share—some would say more than his share—of failures. You would be well within your rights to describe him as unreliable, ornery, confrontational, or an occasional obnoxious textualist. He’s been all of those things! But one thing West will not hesitate to sue your ass ov...

And Now, A Modern Drug Deal Gone Wrong
Today, we’re talking about drugs, buffets, shitty NFL stock music, and more....

If You’re Defending Tom Brady’s Cheap Martyr Routine, You’re Fucking Pathetic
The scene is good. In case you missed it, have a gander below at the now-infamous scene from the new Paul Rudd show Living With Myself where Tom Brady strolls out of a massage parlor:...
![This Is Not How Wrestling Ring Ropes Work, <i>WWE 2K20 </i>[Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/xmq7n84piyeg9li0pbs0.gif)
This Is Not How Wrestling Ring Ropes Work, <i>WWE 2K20 </i>[Update]
Madden glitches are a well-covered phenomenon, but it’s officially time for a new challenger to step into the ring with its own brand of broken gameplay. WWE 2K20 came out on Tuesday, and already fans are finding match-breaking bugs and general unpolished hilarity, such as this mess of a Tables, Lad...

Bill Belichick Delights In Tormenting The Hapless Jets
Viewers who hadn’t already slipped into a coma Monday night will have noticed a funny sequence early in the fourth quarter of the Patriots’ blowout victory over a spectacularly inept Jets team. A pair of declined penalties against New England’s punt team produced the ultra-rare scene of Bill Belichi...

"Spooky" Sam Darnold Sees Dead People In Ghastly Loss To Dreaded Patriots
Sam Darnold’s first game back after a bout with smooching disease went great! The returning hero threw for 300-plus yards, and his Jets upset the Cowboys, and poor, discarded Luke Falk was swiftly forgotten. Darnold was even named AFC Offensive Player of the Week! Darnold’s second game, Monday night...

Mets Owners Gave Bill de Blasio $5,400 The Day Before He Quit His Presidential Campaign
In 2019, Jed Lowrie suffered a lower-body injury in spring training that somehow never got better or better-understood; for much of the year, the injury was just designated as “left side.” While he was unable to play the field at all, Lowrie did finally make it back to the bigs at the very end of th...

Video Shows Former Oregon Receiver Keanon Lowe Disarming, Hugging Suicidal Student
Former Oregon Ducks wide receiver Keanon Lowe was heralded as a hero back in May when it was reported that he brought down a would-be school shooter before anyone at a Portland high school could get hurt. Video of the incident has since been released because of a public records request from KOIN 6 i...

WWE Is Banking On Crossover Athletes To Carry Its Next Creepy Saudi Show
When WWE signed a deal with the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia last year, only the basics of the pact with the Gulf dictatorship were clear—biannual shows, in the kingdom, in exchange for a massive payday. Everything beyond that was difficult to imagine at the time, and became more and more difficult to ju...

The Washington Nationals Are The Team Of Destiny, Until They're Not
For the entirety of their brief existence in the nation’s capital, the Washington Nationals have been too insignificant or too lousy or too unlucky or too self-defeating to hate. This is not to say that I haven’t figured out various ways to do it over the years, but also I am not without some intere...

Demaryius Thomas And Bill Belichick Both Agree That Thomas Shouldn't Have Trusted The Patriots
Less than a year after tearing his Achilles, veteran wide receiver Demaryius Thomas has established himself with the Jets this year, though that was never his plan entering this season. He thought he was going to be a Patriot, and after a strange offseason, he’s not very happy with Bill Belichick an...

This Is Darby Allin And I Love Him
The Tim Burton creature pictured directly above these words is a pro wrestler named Darby Allin, who currently performs for the start-up promotion All Elite Wrestling. Today I am here to tell you that I would die for this skeleton twink. Allin has only been wrestling for about four years, and he’s ...

Apologies To This Hockey Child, But I Am His Mother Now
Whether or not to have a child is a complicated and morally questionable decision that each person must weigh carefully. It is a difficult question for most people except for me, because I have decided to adopt this small hockey boy and love him forever. ...

Gross, Someone Let Their Cat Puke In The Stanley Cup
There’s a long and storied history of NHL players putting gross shit in the Stanley Cup in the offseason after they win it all. But whoever let their cat vomit up this hairy this mound of flesh-colored puke into the Cup yesterday owes everybody an apology. In the past, the trophy’s been filled with...

A Pair Of Phantom Penalties Cost The Lions A Win In Green Bay
Sure, the Lions could have scored some more touchdowns Monday night. Their offense started hot, with a neat flea-flicker for a 66-yard gain on the first drive, and a 58-yard Matthew Stafford bomb to wideout Marvin Hall on the second. For all the opportunities in the red zone, they couldn’t get the ...

Seriously, What The Hell Is WWE Even Doing Right Now?
It’s been a weird week in WWE, and not in a way that anyone at the promotion would have wanted. ...

It's Neat To Think Of The Patriots Someday Playing Against A Real NFL Offense
The Patriots beat the Giants Thursday night, 35–14, to move to 6–0 on the season. This was the second consecutive week where the Patriots looked vulnerable in the first half against a plucky but overmatched underdog, before a cascading series of second-half failures tilted things dramatically for th...

It's Time For NXT To Say Goodbye To Full Sail University
Let’s not overreact. After two weeks of the new Wednesday Night Wars, nothing about the future of the industry is really much clearer than it was before, and lord knows none of it is set in stone. All Elite Wrestling followed up its good debut showing on TNT with an even better episode on Wednesday,...

Rockets Flack Tells Reporter To Stick To Sports After She Asks Players About Political Expression
Russell Westbrook and James Harden each dropped 22 points in the Rockets’ preseason victory over the Raptors in Saitama, Japan. In the postgame presser, CNN’s Christina Macfarlane asked a question of the two players:...

The Inherent Demeaning Effects Of Global Capital, Bootlicking, Things Of That Nature
In a better world, we’d all probably still work a decent amount. Probably not quite as much and definitely not under conditions that work in a thousand different ways to demean and diminish every human involved at every level, while somehow serving to enrich only the worst of those, but in that bett...