we Page 657 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Guess Who Arrived First For Broncos Practice Today?
At 8:01 this morning: "Tim Tebow. Of course." [@AdamSchefter]...
Spencer Hawes Honors The Seattle SuperSonics With A Terrible Haircut
The people of Seattle will go to great lengths to honor their former team. They will heckle billionaires. They will refuse free, courtside seats to the NBA playoffs. And they will shave an outline of the Seattle Space Needle into the backs of their heads....
Eric Wedge's Mustache Tweets From The Dead
From an iPhone, no less. When the Mariners' losing streak reached 14 games Saturday night, manager Eric Wedge made the "drastic" decision to shave his 'stache, thinking it might help with karma or whatever. It didn't, as Seattle lost again to Boston yesterday. The People Against Eric Wedge's Mustac...
Breaking: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is $171.45, But That's Because He Didn't Pay Last Month's Bill
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....
Don't Dream It's Over: Disney Permanently Cancels ESPN: The Weekend
Last week, we mentioned, barely suppressing our glee, that ESPYs ratings had hit their lowest point in 16 years. With similar exuberance, we gave you ESPN's condom-obsessed in-house standards bible. Death knells....
The Strange Daily Commute Of Kei Igawa, Minor League Superstar
Bill Pennington has a splendid New York Times piece today about Kei Igawa, the other Japanese pitcher who came over to the US in the winter of 2006. The Red Sox splurged on the posting fee for Daisuke Matsuzaka—who, let's not forget, had two nice seasons before becoming the biggest Boston blight sin...
Presenting Your First Photo Of Mr. And Mrs. Ben Roethlisberger
The nuptials have apparently moved from ring-exchange ceremony onto the reception, per the whole #bigbenswedding extravaganza on Twitter. This picture apparently includes the Roethlisbergers and a friend named Mandisa....
Today Is The Day That A Reformed Ben Roethlisberger Makes A Physician's Assistant His Bride
Last night, Mr. and (soon-to-be) Mrs. Ben Roethlisberger hosted their wedding rehearsal dinner. The groom wore yellow. The bride smiled broadly in photographs that were released to the local paper before this glorious day commenced in Pittsburgh. Here are some fun facts regarding Allegheny County's...
Chris Kluwe Responds: Can I Kick It? (Yes, I Can)
Dear Nate Jackson,...
Alonzo Mourning Sued For Hit-And-Run Incident Following Chris Bosh's Wedding
In the hours before dawn on Sunday, Mourning smashed his Porsche into a disabled car on a Miami Beach causeway, sending it rolling. Mourning got out of his car, went to check on the victim (he was not seriously injured) and drove home, where he called police and later returned to the scene in his wi...
Dear Chris Kluwe: When We Want The Punter's Opinion, We'll Ask For It (We Won't)
Chris Kluwe should know better....
An Entire Section Of DC United Fans Planked At Last Night's Game
Well, planking just won't die. We thought it had, over the weekend. But maybe soccer fans based in DC don't watch morning news in Dallas....
The Graceful, Oversized Legacy of Yao Ming
How long was Yao Ming going to last? That was the question about the seven-foot-six center long before he broke his foot for the first time in the NBA. When Yao joined the league nine summers ago, picked first overall in the 2002 draft by the Houston Rockets, he was the man who would bring the entir...
Is Baseball To Blame For The Pathetic State Of Pie Throwing?
So some dope interrupted the Murdoch family's stammering and mumbling today by "throwing a pie" at Rupert Murdoch, which actually meant waving a styrofoam plate in Murdoch's direction as some sort of foam slid off it, till Mrs. Rupert Murdoch jumped up and clobbered the "pie" guy....
Minor League Team To Give Away Tweeting Weiner Boxers On Saturday
Except the shorts the American Association's St. Paul Saints will give away are Tweeting Wiener Boxers, and not Tweeting Weiner Boxers, both because it's National Hot Dog Day and because the Saints would rather be cheeky than direct about former congressman Anthony Weiner. Although we know any New Y...
Amidst Lockout, NBA Players, Executives Awkwardly Ask Each Other To Dance
Remember how when Yao Ming retired after nine years in Houston, they weren't allowed to call him or release a comment? One of the side effects of the lockout is that players can't have any contact with their teams, so we were forced to imagine Yao sitting at home, staring at the phone, not understan...
This Is What The WWE Title Belt Looks Like In CM Punk's Fridge
There were some goings on at the WWE's "Money in the Bank" PPV last night (to catch up on the stakes, read the Masked Man's preview). Basically, CM Punk is "no longer a WWE employee," but left with the title after beating John Cena in the main event....
Chris Kluwe's 'Downfall' Parody Has Hitler Calling Lockout Negotiators "Lazy Shitfucks"
Downfall parodies seem like they're somehow older than the internet by now. But when one is made by an actual NFL player, we're willing to listen. And Vikings punter Chris Kluwe does a pretty good job of capturing what we're all feeling about the lockout these days....
On Patrick Kane's Injury
The Blackhawks announced that Kane will undergo surgery to repair a fractured wrist. We were inundated with requests to investigate, because PK is a favorite around these parts....
MLS Proves Soccer Superiority Over EPL With Fluke Goalkeeper Goal
When a mid-table American side takes on a mid-table English side in a friendly, you throw out the record books. San Jose faced off against West Brom last night, and both sides rested most of their starters because, c'mon, it's San Jose vs. West Brom. But that meant that Earthquakes keeper David Bi...