we Page 765 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

RBI Baseball, Bracket Style
If you happen to be in the general vicinity of the Comfort Suites Airport hotel in Columbus, Ohio this weekend, do we ever have the leisure activity for you: It's 2007 Ohio National RBI Baseball Tournament. Thar's right, kids: For $100, you can play the world's greatest video baseball game in which ...

Finally, We Can Love Women's Tennis Once Again (Gurgle) ...
So what, we have freaking robot children now, but we can't invent a female tennis player who is both super smoking hot and amazingly talented? Well that's just a load of ... wait. Ana Ivanovic? Could it be true?...

ESPN Would Like To Remind You Of Its Omnipotence
Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that instead of watching Game One of the NBA Finals last night, you decided your evening would be better spent watching the MLS game between the Colorado Rapids and the Houston Dynamo on ESPN2. That wouldn't be our choice, but whatever: You just love the MLS and e...

Sebastien Gacond Is Gay (As Long As You Make It Clear It's The "Happy" Kind Of Gay)
This is Sebastien Gacond. He is a professional triathlete, which is impressive; it must be difficult to be an athlete with three major appendages. He is also not gay. Not gay at all. Nothing gay about Sebastien Gacond. He is all man. It is extremely important that you understand this....

To Watch Tonight
What you'll watch once you get to The Winchester ... • College softball: World Series, championship series, Game 3, Tennessee vs. Arizona, at Oklahoma City. One run to rule them all. [ESPN2] • MLB: Philadelphia at New York Mets. Danny DeVito, NOOO! [ESPN] • NHL: Stanley Cup Finals, Ottawa at Anaheim...

Come See Rick Reilly Make Armpit Noises
We've encouraged you to come to the Varsity Letters Reading Series in New York before, but if you come to tonight's endeavor, you'll be in for a special treat. (Depending on how you define "special.") The headlining reader is Sports Illustrated columnist/stand-up comic Rick Reilly. (Donald Evans and...

Kevin Durant Is Low On The Upper Body Strength
Among those who care more about silly workout statistics and the notion of watching young men in their underwear run, jump and lift things than simply watching how preternaturally blessed athletes dominate their sports, there was considerable concern this week about Kevin Durant's relatively weak sh...

Some Things You See That You Can't Unsee
Friends, we have seen death; we have walked up to it, looked it straight in the eye and then scampered off and hid under our desk....

Serena Williams Scoots Out Down The Road
Earlier today (or yesterday, or whatever the heck time it is in Australia), Serena Williams lost in the French Open. Fortunately, this video, from our friends at The Fanhouse, reveals that her time in France was anything but a waste. It's cute: She dances like our aunt at a wedding. Of course, our a...

This Man Knows What Athletics Really Mean
The Fanhouse discussed this yesterday, but we wouldn't help but play with it some more: There's a Massachusetts politician named Kevin Thompson who is kind of losing his mind about Tom Brady. Actually, he has a problem with athletes in general....

Two Hours In, And We Already Hate Ourselves
We got a late start, so we're only two hours into the great "watch the ESPN family of networks" experiment of 2007. (Though you won't be able to read it until 2008.) So far, we've seen the same "SportsCenter" twice and have marveled at just how handsome Mike Greenberg really is. This is going to be ...

The Danes Like To Punch
If the Second War of Schleswig taught us anything, it's that the Danish lack problem-solving skills. Yesterday, during a Euro 2008 qualifier, a Danish player punched a Swedish player in the stomach, and was, of course, red-carded and sent off. Apparently feeling like it should be perfectly legal to ...

A-Rod Is Dead, Dawg
• Jose Canseco and his fake reality show] • Cheese wheel. • Nothing offensive about this, nope. • This lady? Never heard of her. Until now! • Ichiro is wacky. • Every party should have Mr. Met. • LeBron might be all kinds of amazing. • Here come the otters! HERE COME THE OTTERS! • Isiah Thomas, a bu...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after coming in from recess ... • College softball: World Series at Oklahoma City, Tennessee vs. Texas A&M and Baylor vs. Arizona. Shootout at the OK corral. [ESPN] • Golf: LPGA, Ginn Tribute, first round, at Mt. Pleasant, S.C. We have a bad case of Annika Sorenstam. [The Golf Channel]...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wishing a happy birthday to the legend that is unsilent majority ... • MLB: Cleveland at Boston [ESPN2]; Florida at Chicago Cubs. Red Sox's magic number is 90. [WGN] • NBA: Western Conference finals, Utah at San Antonio, Game 5. Let's point the t-shirt cannon toward the court thi...

How To Detract Attention From Your Attractive Teenage Daughter
Problem: Nasty bloggers are spreading your 18-year-old pole vaulting daughter's picture across the Internets. (They can send all the letters to Ufford they want, but you can still find the picture here and here and about a million other places.) Solution: Scream your lungs out about it on the front ...

About Last Night
What you missed while enjoying the new side of Darth Vader... • NBA: Spurs lead Jazz 91-79 after three quarters in their ... wait, what? That's a final? • NHL: Year of the Duck ... Anaheim takes 1-0 lead over Senators. • MLB: Milestone for the Braves! No, Cox wasn't ejected; it was Jones' 350th home...

Of Ping Pong Balls And Dogfights
• A-Rod likes his balls. • Carl Monday remains unstoppable. • Clinton Portis likes it when dogs fight. • Dan Shanoff live blogged the draft lottery, and it was not a happy night for Celtics fans. • AJ Hawk will be more careful about wedding photographers in the future. • NBC switches from playoff ov...

We Know Where Lassie Will Be This Weekend
What's coming up in the world of minor league baseball ... we proudly present you with Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...

The Future Of Sports Can Be Found On Google Patents
Using the invaluable Google Patent Search, the fine folks at Winning The Turnover Battle have dug up the most intriguing and odd sports patents making their way through the wacky inventors pipeline. Our favorite, the No Hang Basketball Net, is pictured....