week Page 35 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Toast To This Smut-Filled Week of Debauchery
Thank GOD this week is over. Christ. Between going out on dates with dim-witted strippers, gloom-and-doom reports from management, litigious MMA fighters and threats from spatially-challenged U of F co-eds, this week has been a perfect storm of corporate drudgery. Well, not the stripper. But that wa...
Barack Obama Will Not Take Away Your Ties Or Your Hair
I don't remember where I saw it, but about a year-and-a-half ago, in one of those "Hey, there's a cool black guy running for President!" stories, the writer posited that Barack Obama, if he were to somehow win (crazy!), would have something immediately in common with John F. Kennedy: He could destro...
Week In Review: Don't You Wish We All Could Be As Happy As Baby Mangino?
Here are some of this week's stories that didn't have anything to do with Caitlin Davis. • The Brady Quinn era begins...with a loss • How to open a beer with ...Nazi shark! • Joey Porter: professional trash talker • More trouble for the Olson family.• Barack Obama is elected: Some surprisingly good ...
Election Night: An Excuse To Stay Up Past 8:30
Well, it's here. When I was a kid, Election Night was one of the few nights of the year I was allowed to stay up past 8:30. (Seriously, my bedtime was 8:30 until I was a freshman in high school. And you wonder why I still wet the bed.) I never knew who any of the candidates were, or even what the "...
Week In Review: Yes Us Can
We're THIS close to having a new President, people. Four more days! Four more days! OK, I'm shutting this thing down, but not before we review what we've learned this week. • Erin Andrews can tuck me in any time. • Tonight, we're all Phillies fans ... except for that guy in the Padres hat. Let's get...
Awful Announcing's Weekly Media Rundown
Each Friday afternoon Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed during the past week from the world of Sports Media. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
The Machines Shall Rise, And All Will Fall
All right, so the world is imploding. You know this. I know this too, though only because the Wassup Guys told me. Surely, these are the last days, before the global apocalypse rids the planet of humans and leaves only some cockroaches, a few stray strands of hair and, of course, Kermit, because Ke...
Week In Review: What's the Frequency, Carl Monday?
Here's a photo Carl Monday submitted from commenter "That Just Happened" when the jack-happy roving reporter attended the ribbon cutting ceremony of Cleveland''s RTA HealthLine, which is a big fancy bus. Public transportation frotteurists in Cleveland should reconsider using this line to satisfy the...
Bill Cosby Would Like to Welcome You to the Weekly Video Rundown
Each Friday afternoon Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed during the past week from the world of Sports Media. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
It's Obama And McCain ... AFTER DARK!
So over the weekend, the two candidates for President — Sen. Barack Obama, head of a Muslim sleeper cell, and Sen. John McCain, organizer of the first Hanoi chapter of the Ku Klux Klan — spoke at the Al Smith Dinner, a big Catholic charity event held in Manhattan right before the elections every y...
Week In Review: Don't Mess With Texas, You Mormon Freaks
This was a pretty hilariously awful sign posted during last night's TCU trouncing of BYU, where students name-dropped the spooky El Dorado church compound raids in order to intimidate the supposedly up-and-coming Cougars. It worked, obviously. So, there will be a couple of announcements on Monday. ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while your monkey reads a Mexican newspaper ... • College football: Hawaii at Boise State (8 p.m., ET) Visiting uniforms clash with blue field. [ESPN] • Golf: LPGA, Kapalua Classic, second round, at Lahaina, Hawaii (8:30 p.m., ET). Suzann Pettersen, please sign the scorecoard in my hea...
You Should Probably Stop Having Birthday Parties When You're 11
I turned 33 over the weekend. There's something inherently sad about a single 33-year-old man hosting his own birthday party. I remember when my father turned 33; I was 11. It was my parents, my sister and myself eating tacos and watching the Cardinals game. That was pretty fun. I've had birthday b...
Week In Review: I Hope Kimbo's Son Has A Better Weekend
Let's wrap this up quickly, since this space will be occupied by Sussman's Red Sox/Rays liveblog tonight. Watch him do that thing that makes the ladies say hoooooooooo..... • Brady hearts McCain • Rays wax • Kimbo gets rocked by this dude • Ladies wax • Stu's got his eye on you • Buzzsaw gets raped ...
Oh, For The Days Of Rape And Murder Questions At Debates
The second Presidential debate is tonight, coinciding, quite helpfully, with the first night off of the baseball postseason. I spend about 45 percent of my workday reading political blogs from all sides of the spectrum, some conservative, some (OK, more) liberal, and absolutely none written by tha...
Week In Review: A Club Full of Tiny Members
So there have obviously been a few minor changes here this week, all of which will be addressed at a later date. Nothing to see here, please disperse, all that. For now. Also, I'd like to take this opportunity to thank Clay for all his contributions to Deadspin during his full-time tenure here. Hone...
College Football Preview: Y'all Better Recognize Joe Pa Wants His Daps, Yo
The eyes of the college football world shift to Nashville, Tennessee this weekend where the mighty Vanderbilt Commodores will be hosting Auburn. This is a huge game for Vandy. The last time they beat Auburn was 1955, the same year that Rosa Parks instituted her bus boycott in Montgomery. Yep, black ...
This Column Is Desperate For A Bailout
Before we get started, a few words on America's financial crisis. (Because hey, who knows more about our economy than a sports blogger from Nowhere, Illinois?) I am going to apply my years of insight as reporter for Registered Rep. magazine, as well as my minutes upon minutes of CNBC viewing, to ex...
Week In Review: Dry The Rain
Hi there. After last night's Mets and Brewers victories, I'm legitimately worried. This time of the year it's all about momentum and those teams have it and the Phillies, sadly, do not. I'll say it right now — if the Phillies lose tonight, the season's over. As a long-suffering Philadelphia fan ever...
Wrigley Field Destroys A Man's Soul
I spent last weekend at Wrigley Field, watching the stupid Cubs clinch their stupid division and drink some stupid champagne in front of their stupid fans. It was the first time my father had ever been to Wrigley Field, and I have to think it'll be his last. Poor guy. He makes it nearly 60 years wi...