week Page 38 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Commence Memorializing In An Approrpriate Manner Right Now
• Barkley admits he has a gambing problem. Kind of. • Softball ladies no longer have to resemble Drew Carey • Bill Simmons continues to fulminate • Chris Cooley: Almost married man • Basketbawful has been killing the NBA playoff coverage • Minor Enterprise is definitely hitting its stride • He...

Dusty Basketball Courts Far, Far Away
Even though I promised an alarming amount of irreverence for most of today, it would be unconscionable of me not to sendTrue Hoop genius Henry Abbott as many eyeballs as humanly possible over to his story, "Infantry Hoops in Iraq." Afer he inquired about the amount of basketball being played by some...

Perhaps Simmons Should Write A Newspaper Column
• Tony K kisses newspapers goodbye. • Utah fans are scary. • Dee Mirich returns! • Reggie MIller, drinkin' • Hirshey nailed the end of the EPL season. • Barkley and Vegas, two great tastes that taste great together. • Sit a few plays out, big guy. • Thank you, Milwaukee! • When Charles Haley attacks...

About Last Night
What you missed while eating your $100 cheesesteak ... • NBA: Manu the Hour ... Ginobli's 25 points lead Spurs' rout of Hornets, force game 7 in New Orleans. That should be fun, eh? • MLB: No matter where you try to hide pitcher Jason Isringhausen, someone's bound to find him. Pirates 11, Cardinals ...

Ozzie Guillen And His Inflatable Fans
• Inflatable groupies. • A-Rod, cool under pressure. Totally. • Flomax! • Tim Tebow, a cut above. • A kid that is now somewhat less smelly. • The horse revolution. • Mindy McCready, not selling albums. • Look what two motorcycle crashes can produce. • Jamie Moyer has a friend in baseball schedules. ...

Braylon Edwards Does Not, In Fact, Blog
• Hey, What'd we miss? Oh, yeah. That. • Oh, and nobody had a better take than Daulerio. • John Daly, shirtless. • Jeff Reed. Two words, so much meaning. • Careful, Coach Weis. • Pat Jordan is a badass. • Roger Clemens should not be allowed around early teens. Nor should Karl Malone, for that matte...

About Last Night
What you missed due to a slight preoccupation with porn ... • MLB: A.J. Burnett provides Canada some good news for a change. Blue Jays 3, Red Sox 0. • NBA: Kevin Durant wins NBA Rookie of the Year award. Seattle sues to keep trophy from moving to Oklahoma City. • NHL: Rangers postpone the inevitable...

Now You See T.O., Now You Don't
• Terrell Owens, vanishing from porn films. • Santonio Holmes is packing some heat. • Butterfingers for a Red Sox fan. • Jeff Passan and Terry Pettis. • Topless ladies (kinda) at Rockies games. • It's Jeff Reed night. • Yankees-Red Sox fight! • As spirited a defense of the NFL Draft as we could imag...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after surviving the Great Jell-o Snack Pack Disaster of 2008 ... • Boxing: Middleweights, Andrey Tsurkan vs. Jesse Feliciano, at New York (9:30 p.m., ET). The return of El Rayo! [ESPN2] • NBA playoffs: Eastern Conference first round, Game 3, Detroit Pistons at Philadelphia 76ers (7 p.m...

Goodbye To All That
• We miss Isiah, already. • No more primates at the Washington Post. • Good night, Lima. • NFL schedule is out. • The end of Harold Reynolds' lawsuit against ESPN. • Carmelo is very sorry. • Lots of discussions on Bill Simmons. But no Barack Obama for him. • Will Clark, charming. • One Nutty Buddy. ...

About Last Night
What you missed while reading the new children's book about cosmetic surgery ... • MLB: Nice and Easley does it ... wild pitch in 14th gives Mets 3-2 win over Nationals. • College basketball: It's official. Kevin Love will enter NBA draft. The era of the one-year college player is in full swing. • N...

The Week We Lost A Steely McBeam
• Congratulations ... sigh ... to Bill Self. • Buckner, Fenway, heartwarming, kind of, not really. • Gen. Petraeus on the Wii. • This is a very specific personalized jersey. • Rick Astley and Shea Stadium. • Roy Williams, and Hooters. • Steely McDrunky. • Pat Summitt is awesome. • All right, everybo...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after cursing the new Yankees Stadium forever ... • Boxing: Super featherweights, Josesito Lopez vs. Edgar Santana; super middleweights, James McGirt Jr. vs. Carlos De Leon Jr., in Miami (11 p.m., same-day tape on West Coast). Lopez-Santana, California vs. New York. Ding! [Showtime] • ...

About Last Night
What you missed while playing the world's biggest game of Where's Waldo ... • MLB: Boss, I demand a Reyes ... Mets beat Phillies in 12th thanks in great part to the baserunning stylings of Jose Reyes. • College basketball: Note to Self ... be sure to turn down offers and stay at Kansas. • NHL: Preda...

Matt Leinart Suddenly Dirty
• Opening Day! • President Bush would have been a better commissioner. • Look: Daulerio works here now. • Matt Leinart once, and Matt Leinart twice. • Andy Roddick, doing OK for himself. • We miss Davidson already. • Stuart Scott on the microphone. • Joel Zumaya, bringing rock. • Larry King really, ...

Stuart Scott Obviously Feels Better
Wow, that "ESPN the Weekend" sure looks like it was fun. Here's Stuart Scott getting all Chuck D on the karaoke mic with proper S1W accompaniment by Charles Barkley playing the role of Flavor Flav and, hmm, Mr. Belding from "Saved By The Bell" obviously filling Professor Griff's giant shoes....

Someone Should Have Canseco Throw Out The First Pitch Somewhere
• A busy week for Joe Lavin. Oh, and for Jose Canseco. Not that you really cared. • Pat Jordan! • Don't make Isiah go away. • That might have been a foul. • Drew was certainly on his game this week. • Blit Meat! • The Emo UCLA Fan. • The Red Sox, A's split in Japan. • Please make Jay Mariotti feel b...

A Rather Shining Moment In The First Round
• Eliot Spitzer and David Hirshey, soccer pals. • Our new "pal," Bob Costas. • Apparently, some folks aren't happy with ESPN. • Kige Ramsey, charity hero. (Oh, and no bids yet.) • Mark Cuban remains the only blogger allowed in the Mavs' locker room. • Hey, the brackets came out. • We had a few game...

The Final Hours Before Selection Sunday
• A grand anniversary. • Tommy Bowden, not always so nice. • Welcome back, Battlebots. • When sleds attack. • Mark Cuban has all kinds of confusing rules. • Man, Felix Pie. • Hey, UNC beat Duke. • Enjoying Billy Crystal. For once. • Daulerio returns. (With Bill Conlin!) • Oh, Bob, Bob, Bob....

Pi Is The Loneliest Number
Each day this week, Storming The Floor will be previewing that night's important games. Enjoy....