white Page 64 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
All College Football Games To Be Settled By White Rapper Battles (Update!)
Not to be outdone by the only two guys in Iowa who listen to rap music, Georgia Tech fans would like to remind you about their opponents in the Orange Bowl of Awkward "Hip Hop" Videos, The GTGs. Lose yourself.......
Oregon-Based Rappers Request Permission To Show You Their "O"
Not many hardcore rap songs begin with the phrase "holy moly" and then rhyme "Lego" and "Eggos," but then not that many people write raps songs about ducks. Spit that fire, gentlemen.......
Sammy Sosa Doesn't See Why People Are So Terrified By His Appearance
The formerly dark-skinned Sosa spoke out about his ghostly new look and he would like to let everyone know that he's not dying or anything: "It's a bleaching cream," he said. You don't say....
Jayhawk Superfan Has Quite The Rap Sheet
KU's most visible fan, White Owl, is nowhere to be seen this season, thanks to some pretty hilarious legal trouble. That's him up in the picture. He's the one who's white. And a little crazy....
Sammy Sosa Would Like To Clear Up Some Things About His Skin
Sammy Sosa is not hoping to star in the White Chicks sequel. It is not some kind of alleged side affect from any alleged substances he allegedly may have put in his body. He just wants to be beautiful!...
Fear Of A Blackface Planet: Cowboys Cheerleader, Meet Deron Williams
Yes, poor Whitney Isleib is getting some mixed reviews after she decided to shoe polish her face in order to authenticate her Lil' Wayne costume, but there is decidedly less uproar over Deron Williams' terrifying Cal Ripken costume....
Apparently, Paul Brown Stadium Is Also A Very Large Public Urinal
Here's a fun fact: Texans' right guard Chris White pissed his pants against the Bengals on Sunday because he was "uncomfortable," but didn't want to come off the field. Don't worry. Jeff Reed's got his back. [Chronicle; Photo]...
Good Guys Wear Briefs
Here's a video of a sad White Sox vendor in his underwear horsewhipping a bench. This is apparently some grand tradition that dates back to those days when the Sox were managed by the Marquis de Sade. [Sun-Times]...
UFC President Pretty Excited To See Herschel Walker Fight
Dana White: "Who the f**k are they going to find to fight Herschel Walker? A guy in a wheelchair?..The geniuses over at Showtime are the most arrogant, cocky, pompous jackasses I've ever met." [FanHouse]...
The Exception That Proves Exactly Nothing
One of our favorite gambits here at FJM is the old "use the exception that proves the rule to yell at someone for not thinking the exception is the rule" gambit....
White Sox Trade Jim Thome, Throw In The Towel
The White Sox, losers of four in a row, have fallen six games behind the division-leading Tigers. And since it's now September, there's really no point in trying anymore. Time to start shedding contracts and call it a season....
Crappy White Sox Tickets No One Wanted Are Now Expensive Keepsakes
Maybe you didn't see Mark Buehrle twirl a perfect game live, but now, thanks to the glories of American commerce and the indifference of Sox fans, you can buy an unsold ticket from that day and pretend you did. [Ticketmaster]...
Kenny Williams' No Good, Very Bad Day
First, the White Sox GM finds a moldering, $60 million fourth outfielder on waivers. Then he gets popped in Seattle for jaywalking. Only one of these things is criminally stupid....
LenDale White's Revolutionary "No Tequila" Diet
Football fans have been marveling at the transformation of Titans' running back LenDale White, who has trimmed his previous bowling ball-like physique down to a svelte 228-pound Mack Truck. So how did he do it? By not eating worms, obviously....
Why Your Stadium Sucks: U.S. Cellular Field
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The Chicago White Sox's U.S. Cellular Field....
Once More To The Pool
Summertime, oh summertime, when on Sundays, pointless galleries seem to make some sense. So, voila! Now go do a cannonball....
I Know Steve Bartman And This Man Is No Steve Bartman
See this fan? He almost grabbed the ball that DeWayne Wise caught to save Mark Buehrle's perfect game. He should feel, really, really, really bad. [Washington Times]...
Suspected Cancer Hoaxer Found Dead
Fifteen-year-old brain cancer patient "Jonathan Jay White" turns out to have been a 24-year-old woman in Ammon, Idaho, who was found Wednesday in her car, dead of an apparent suicide....
You Are Sort Of There For Buehrle's Perfect Game
An unemployed blogger provides an on-the-scene report from Mark Buehrle's perfect game. Well, as on-the-scene as you can get from the top of the bleachers. [Tremendous Upside Potential]...
Mark Buehrle Didn't Pitch Much Out Of The Stretch Today
Isn't it nice to have an actual sports story to cover? After the jump, we'll break down Mark Buehrle's perfect game in pictures, numbers, and ritual sacrifices....