with Page 44 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

NFL Player Tries To Straighten Out His Woman With A Mop Handle
Oakland Raiders offensive lineman Cornell Green seems to have been upset with the mother of his two children over something. Sometimes it takes a little more to get a lady to just listen. [TBO]...

The (Not Very) Fast And The Furious
Florida woman hits, drags other woman with golf cart, throwing in assorted curses during the attack. We're going to have to deduct a stroke for that. [WFTV.com]...

This Is Why Warm-Up Drills Are Dangerous
Stan Simpson, Illinois frosh, killed in the low post during practice... no, of course he wasn't. But I'm sure his whole face smells like Wilson right now. [The Sports Hernia]...

Mike Krzyzewski Not Thrilled With Barack-etology
For someone who has a former Duke player as his personal aide, President Obama is getting very little love from the Blue Devils today. Especially annoyed is coach Mike Krzyzewski....

OK, What's With All The Lesbian Gym Teachers Around Here?
The shocking truth: There may be lesbian physical education teachers in San Francisco Bay Area high schools, and they're diddling with students. And according to one law enforcement official, it's technology's fault....

Boomer Esiason Will Sweep The Leg
Boomer Esiason interviewing Ralph Macchio on the enduring legacy of The Karate Kid? Yes, sign me up. Oh, and did you know they're doing a remake? Wax on. Wax off....

Who Says Conference USA Is Not Very Deep?
Everyone says that Memphis plays in a conference where talent doesn't stretch very far, but we did assume that the talent at least stretched farther than Memphis's own bench....

So Much For LT Going Elsewhere
Rejoice, San Diegans. Ladainian Tomlinson will be around to spell Darren Sproles for the next three years. [AP]...

Alex Smith Is Back, But Apparently In Disguise
Things don't usually work this way, but hey, we're in a recession. Alex Smith — once thought totally extinct in the wild — is back with the 49ers under a new, slimmer contract....

Terrell Owens Signs With Buffalo Bills
ESPN says Terrell Owens has signed a 1-year, $6.5 million deal with Buffalo. Wait ... the Buffalo Bills? Well, I certainly did not see that one coming. [ESPN]...

Which Team Has Best Odds Of Landing T.O.? (Update)
Much freewheeling speculation on the Interwebs today about where Terrell Owens will end up, but if you want to put your money where your mouth is, one site is actually booking odds....

God Lights The Way For Kurt Warner, Demands 15 Percent
Kurt Warner officially announced his new deal with the Cardinals on Wednesday, saying that it was God who told him to eschew the 49ers and return to Arizona....

What's $1.5 Million Between Friends?
Jon Heyman reports that $43.5 million over two years is the new number the Dodgers need to cough up for Manny's services this year That's what Manny reportedly passed along to Boras. [SI.com]...

Farewell, Brian Dawkins?
This is a sad day for Philadelphia Eagles fans. Brian Dawkins, long-time safety and recent perfecter of legalized helmet-to-helmet knockout hits, is heading to Bronco country next season, according to one report....

Boston Is Now Officially Marbury Country
"The Celtics became intrigued with Marbury in the preseason when he averaged 8.5 points and 3.1 assists and went to the free throw line regularly in seven games." [Boston Globe]...

Big, Bold ESPN Book Will Showcase Bristol's Not Ready For Primetime Players
Yesterday it was revealed that Tom Shales and James A. Miller, co-authors of the fascinating Live From New York! uncensored history of SNL are currently working on one about ESPN. Brace yourselves....

Albert Haynesworth Becomes Highest Paid Face-Stomper In History
The Redskins, still spending like it's 2002, have inked the Titans' menacing defensive tackle to a 7-year, $100 million deal. [Redskins Insider]...

Andy Phillips Assures Everyone That He's Not The Carl Pavano/Greg Dobbs/John Cena Impersonator
"Anyone who knows me knows I would never have been involved in anything remotely close to something like that." [Pirates Report]...
