world Page 189 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dwight Howard Went To Disney World Anyway
The Magic were upset by Atlanta in the first round, but Dwight Howard, the broadest-shouldered 13-year-old trapped in a 25-year-old's body on planet earth, would not let it ruin his trip to Disney World last weekend. Until, at least, a few days later, when he found the time to call out the Orlando S...
Bulls Fan Learns The Shame Of The Giant Foam Hat
The giant foam hat is all fun and games until it is shown on the Jumbo Tron which is then shown on national television which is then uploaded to YouTube with ridiculing commentary and which then makes it to here, where we will shame your giant foam hat shame. What a world....
Try To Look Surprised: England Says World Cup Voters Asked For Bribes
Ever since the good, godfearing Anglo nations were shut out of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, rumors have flown that Russia and Qatar bribed their way to the top. No one would be surprised because it's FIFA, but it was also sour grapes. And maybe it still is, but this time England is naming names....
What Real Salt Lake's Draw Last Night Says About American Soccer
Real Salt Lake squeaked out a crucial draw last night on a Monterrey pitch lined with football hash marks. (Don't forget that the Borregos Salvages or "Wild Rams" play here, too.) Argentine Javier Morales evened the score at 2-2 for the American side with an 89th-minute goal, giving RSL a fair cha...
Over At CNN, ESPN's LZ Granderson Takes Aim At American Culture, Whore-Friendly Panties
ESPN.com/ESPN Mag columnist LZ Granderson joined CNN last week, apparently writing a weekly column in addition to his ESPN gig. Why would Granderson need another online platform, one might wonder, especially since his Page 2 pieces often tackle stuff other columnists won't?...
Qatari Government Begins Arresting World Cup Reporters 11 Years Before World Cup In Qatar
These Qataris don't wait around. The World Cup is set to kick off in Arabia during the summer of 2022, when temperatures will exceed the boiling point of steel and most life forms will already be extinct. So why not start oppressing reporters now?...
Here's Video Of A Pro Golfer Needing 16 Shots To Conquer A Par-4 Hole
Your morning roundup for April 15, the day after Walter Breuning died of natural causes. He was 114 years and 205 days old....
ESPN's Joe Morgan Replacement Bobby Valentine Is Not Making A Whole Lot Of Sense
Bobby Valentine, who once proved that it takes no more than a fake mustache and a novelty t-shirt to manage a MLB team (provided, of course, that you already manage said team), is in his second year of his second stint at ESPN. This year, the spotlight's shining extra bright on Valentine, who has ...
India, Pakistan, And The Hopeful Futility Of Cricket Diplomacy
One early spring day in 2007, a curious group of worshipers gathered at Mahakaleshwar Jyotirlinga, an 11th century temple in Madhya Pradesh, India. They came not to pray for blessings for themselves or their families, but for something that at the moment seemed much more important....
Qataris Develop Artificial Cloud To Keep Pitch Cool During World Cup
Qatar 2022 will undoubtedly see at least 15 times more pissing and moaning than we had to endure during the South African World Cup last year, but if even half the technology proposed for the games comes to light, it'll remain a fantastic spectacle....
Unblinking Cricket Fan Makes Impressive Bid To Be Next Big Internet Meme
Here's your weekly reminder that the cricket World Cup is still going on in India. This unidentified fan, on hand to see Bangladesh lose to the West Indies last week, challenges you to a staring contest. Or a mustache-twitching contest. But you'll lose in both....
German Fan Violence Turns Underwhelming Soccer Match Into Overwhelming Soccer Scene
Today's Bundesliga match between Kaiserslautern and Frankfurt had all the makings of an exercise in excessive boredom. Frankfurt hasn't scored in eight games; Kaiserslautern hasn't won a match in 2011....
The Detroit Pistons Went With A Malcontent-Free Six-Man Roster Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 26, the day San Francisco starts looking for messages in the snow....
Sepp Blatter Never Met A Disaster He Couldn't Exploit
When we named Sepp Blatter one of the 10 worst men in sports earlier this month, we were being kind. Blatter's repugnance extends well beyond sports. He runs FIFA like a Swiss bank, hoovering up billions of dollars and disbursing them in ways that remain as mysterious as they sound dubious. And all ...
Sri Lanka's Cricket World Cup Song Banned For Promoting Whale Mutilation
Did you know? The World Cup for cricket, the second most popular sport in the world, is underway in India. The 43-day tournament runs through April 2. Did you also know? The festive song above is what it sounds like to say "let's feed the Australian kangaroos cheap bird grain" in Sinhala, the Sri ...
Customs Workers Destroy $10,000 Jersey
When Swiss sports memorabilia collector Olivier Démoli ponied up $10K for a jersey worn by French player David Trezequet in the 1998 World Cup final vs. Brazil, the rarity of the item made the purchase worthwhile....
The Way We Live Now: New Cubs Outfielder Responds To Mockery On His Tumblr
Fernando Perez, outfielder and all-around solid guy, isn't happy with this bit of satire from a Cubs blog. "It's so arbitrary and unfunny I'd be offended if I took the 120 seconds out of my work day to read it," Perez...tumbls. [Outfielding]...
Ashley Cole Punched In The Underpants By Google
For all that is totally brilliant about modern technology, all this advancement has a downside. Notably that it's now damn near impossible to casually steamroller a whole host of women behind Cheryl Cole's back and ever have the whole mess forgotten about....
Remember, NFL Players: You're Subject To A Fine If You Tell A Fan To Suck Your Dick
Lions Center Dominic Raiola has a great rapport with Dolphins fans. [PFT]...
Sepp Blatter Suggests Gays Should "Refrain From Sex" At Qatar 2022. Dick.
This post, written by Richard Gilzene, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....