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Faltering Bills Encouraged By Female Makeout Session
First it was the man and woman getting it on in one of the restrooms, and now this ... as a couple of apparently hot chicks celebrate a Bills touchdown on Monday Night in their own special way. Who would have thought that Ralph Wilson Stadium would be the NFL's hot, sensual love palace? Just what el...

Meet The Only Professional Pitcher Who Has Seen 'High School Musical' Eight Times
I don't know; the whole thing sounds a little sketchy to me. But let's take it from the top: Eri Yoshida, a 16-year-old schoolgirl, has been drafted by the Kobe 9 Cruise, a new independent Japanese professional league based in Tokyo. It will be the first time that a chick of the female persuasion wi...

Evander Holyfield Will Not Go Quietly Into The Night
If you're still stepping into the boxing ring at 46 years old, something has gone horribly wrong in your life. Sometimes it means you're not talented enough to allow you to retire to a life of afternoon mimosas and luxurious silk shirts. Other times you stay in this long for a pure love of boxing, w...

'Slightly Awkward, A Little Dorky And A Little Cute In A Weird Way'; Our Ladies Rate Bill Simmons
Once upon a time, a site called The Black Table had a regular feature entitled Waxing Off, in which women gathered in an online roundtable to discuss issues of the day, and also to make fun of Will Leitch's shoes. And so we got to thinking: With so many great female sports bloggers out there, why no...

College Football Preview: Avoiding Landmines Edition
Now that everyone knows exactly what's going to happen with the rest of the college football season, this is when something inevitably blows up. Because if there's one thing we know about the convoluted BCS system, it's this: nothing is certain with three weekends to go. Alabama still has to get pa...

Youky Lands A Hot One, But There's A Hitch
Where women are concerned, I've always lived my life by a simple rule: Lips which have touched Ben Affleck shall never touch mine. Kevin Youkilis has no such qualms, apparently. The Red Sock got hitched on Tuesday to the lovely Enza Sambataro — Affleck's ex-girlfriend — in front of 120 friends and f...

Everybody Was Shaq Fu Fighting ...
A donnybrook in which Yao Ming squares off against Steve Nash, practically everyone else gets involved in the scuffling, and then Shaq runs in and starts throwing people around like Andre the Giant? Why didn't someone tell me that Wednesday's Rockets-Suns game was going to be so much fun? Video belo...

The Philadelphia Eagles Organization Will Not Allow Reporters to Surf for Smut On Their Time
The Philadelphia Eagles are one of the most notoriously uptight teams when it comes to their public image so this little blurb in John Gonzalez's Inquirer column today comes as no surprise. It turns out that the team's press box is outfitted with a web censoring device, similar to the ones found in ...

Holyfield Will Fight Valuev, And he Means It
... Anybody Want A Peanut? Of course Andre the Giant comes to mind when we find out that Evander Holyfield, age 46, has an agreement to fight 7-foot-2 Russian WBA heavyweight champion Nikolai Valuev, on December 20th in Zurich, Switzerland. But I draw more of a comparison to Hulk Hogan in Rocky III...

Bill "Spaceman" Lee Defends Manny, Canadians and Irish Assassins
Bill Lee isn't famous because he was a good pitcher for a few years in the 1970s. He's famous (and beloved) because he has absolutely no filtering mechanism between his brain and his mouth. The man is a quote machine and so when Boston recently honored him, Mo Vaughn and Mike Greenwell by inducting ...

College Football Roundup: The Hailey and Hanna Nutt Edition
In honor of BCS clarity arriving (thanks to Iowa we now know that the Big 12 will play the SEC for all the gold in Zimbabwe—that isn't already smuggled to Zurich), we bring you two striking young lasses who recently transferred from Arkansas to rejoin their daddy at Ole Miss. Meet Hailey and Hanna ...

Roy Jones, Jr.'s Boxing Future Annulled by Calzaghe
Joe Calzaghe fluttered Roy Jones, Jr. with a million love taps and took a unanimous decision at MSG over the man who seemed to have married into the Pound-for-Pound-Champion clan in the late 90s as it seemed to become his surname. That divorce is final as Calzaghe, 36, recovered from a bit of a surp...

Saturday Night Live Blog: #9 Oklahoma State at #2 Texas Tech
The Big XII has thirteen teams in the Top 10, and this is just another night in which two of them square off on a Saturday night. The undefeated Red Raiders get their second straight prime-time big game against the once-defeated Cowboys. Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit brand cows with their init...

Fight Night: Roy Jones Jr. Takes On A Different Sort Of White Meat
Apologies to Joe Calzaghe, the man opposing Jones tonight, who just happens to be lightweight champion of the world. In tonight's matchup, Calzaghe chases down the big bag of money that the cachet of Jones still brings into the ring. For Jones, he'll get another shot at a title. Tonight's fight is o...

New York Rangers Still Have Receipt For Dead Prospect
It's been almost four whole weeks since the New York Rangers' top draft pick Alexei Cherepanov collapsed and died during a league game in Russia, so the team probably figures that enough time has passed that someone should address the needs of those who have been most effected by this senseless trag...

Masking Tape, An Inebriated Friend, And The Shocking Discovery Of Boyfriend Internet Porn
Once upon a time, a site called The Black Table had a regular feature entitled Waxing Off, in which women gathered in an online roundtable to discuss issues of the day, and also to make fun of Will Leitch's shoes. And so we got to thinking: With so many great female sports bloggers out there, why no...

College Football Preview: John Parker Wilson's Cell Phone Belongs to the Cajuns
Alabama's John Parker Wilson is the latest SEC player attempting to overcome the LSU fans snagging his cell phone number and listing it everywhere on the internets. Confounding Cajuns. You'll recall that earlier this season Knowshon Moreno and A.J. Green were the victims. They joined Tim Tebow from...

Philly Car-Tip Victim Inches Closer to Leaving Public Transportation Behind
Many unfortunate car owners in the Philadelphia area were impacted by the chaos that invaded Broad Street soon after the Philadelphia Phillies (WFC) won the World Series that night. One man, Ted Passon, of Philadelphia, whose car was recklessly flipped over during the Broad Street celebration at 1:3...

ESPN "The Mag" Needs You to Help Them Soothsay
ESPN "The Mag" has unveiled its annual "Next" issue candidates, where it picks a handful of athletes destined for large endorsement deals, debilitating concussions, homosexual rumors, Madonna trysts, and Colorado rape trials. Oh, and greatness. This year's batch includes the Rays' filthy left-hander...

Ralph Wilson Stadium Is A Sexy, Sexy Place
Orchard Park police arrested 37 people at Ralph Wilson Stadium on Sunday, but none more special than the two found creating a "public disturbance" in the 300-level women's restroom during the Jets-Bills contest. It seems that watching Trent Edwards getting piled on while Jay Feeley seduces the uprig...