x Page 1042 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Milton Bradley Has Got His Eye On YOU, Pal
So here's the text of what Royals' TV broadcaster Jim Ryan Lefebvre said that so totally pissed off Milton Bradley on Wednesday. Bradley, you may recall, heard the comments on the radio in the clubhouse following Wednesday's game, and sprinted up four levels at Kauffman Stadium to dismember "introdu...
Marcus Vick Eager To Take Spotlight Back From His Brother
Has it really been a year-and-a-half since a Marcus Vick update? That can't be right! Anyway, our friend "New" Mexico has found himself in some trouble this morning: He was arrested and charged with a DUI....
Freddie Mitchell Just Keeps On Keepin' On
Freddie Mitchell, former Eagles' wide receiver, substitute teacher to the world, is still not yet back in the NFL. Although, it's not for lack of trying, as Fred Ex did have a tryout for the Baltimore Ravens last month. But ballplaya' or not, Freddie Mitchell still knows how to work it. The 700 Leve...
A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2008
This is BALLS DEEP With Drew Magary (Balls® is a registered trademark and has been used with the expressed written consent of AJ Daulerio). It's gonna be like an SI Point After column, only with dick jokes. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100 percent all-new material, is available here....
Milton Bradley Would Like To Have A Word If You've Got A Minute
So Texas Rangers general manager Jon Daniels said that Milton Bradley was "acting cordially" and "wanted to set the record straight" after Bradley's near confrontation with TV play-by-play man Ryan Lefebvre following their game with the Royals Wednesday. Yep, that's exactly how it sounds to me:...
You'll Never Believe This: Ballpark Food Might Not Always Be Up To Par
The Leitch family is heading to the East Coast next weekend to make their first visit to the city of Boston; it is just our good luck that the once-every-five-years trip to Fenway happens to coincide with injuries to the Cardinals' two best players. (Not that we're not winning nevertheless, mind you...
About Last Night...
What you missed while making the jump into academia......
The Inane "Cubs Fans-White Sox Fans: Who's Hotter?" Debate Rages On
This should make for some interesting conversation at the Pants Party [The Sports Hernia]...
Evander Holyfield Would Appreciate It If You'd Pick Up The Check
So Evander Holyfield is broke. His $10 million house (featuring 17 bathrooms and a bowling alley) is in foreclosure, he's behind in child support payments, and things are generally looking bleak. And people, it's your fault. You just aren't buying enough Real Deal Grills! Why not? Dual temperature c...
Just Another Quiet Day In The AL East
His real name is Covelli Loyce Crisp, but you knew that. What you may not have known, is that Coco Crisp's father was a boxer, and his mother was a champion sprinter. So the Red Sox outfielder's actions on Thursday — charging the mound and throwing haymakers after getting plunked by the Rays' James...
The Law Finally Catches Up With The Cruzin Cooler
You may think that this is a free nation; where a man can enjoy a full day of holiday drinking and then drive home peacefully on his motorized cooler without being harrassed by the authorities. But you'd be wrong. A Whitehall, N.Y. man found that out on Memorial Day when he was pulled over while dri...
Jesus Saves, But Still Takes His Usual 15 Percent
You may know that outfielder Josh Hamilton's negotiations of a long-term contract with the Texas Rangers hit a snag recently when he suddenly changed agents; going from Matt Sosnick of Sosnick Cobbe Sports to Michael Moye of Moye Associaties. The reason? Hamilton is a born-again Christian, and "want...
So, Is There Really Any Chance The Red Sox Would Take A Chance On Bonds?
So, David Ortiz could be out for a while. Would the Red Sox dare ... could they ... oh heavens ... they have to consider it, don't they ... could they be considering Barry Bonds? The Red Sox, even though Bonds has called the city racist, seem to be keeping it in mind....
New England Sports Media Loses Some Of Its Venerable Bodaciousness
Hazel Mae, the sultry NESN lead anchor temptress, will have to find a new sports desk to prop her stair-mastered caboose on top of next year....
As If The World Doesn't Hate Americans Enough Already
We start off your work week with a shocking, disturbing video that proves that American-Sino relations are potentially in the worst state since the Red Scare. We've got people over there on their Great Wall … converting people the Red Sox Nation....
Manny's 500th Homer Inspires Bouts Of Tumbling
If you don't properly fumigate for Red Sox fans, they'll show up in droves at your stadium. Take cautionary measures, people. That was the case last night at Camden Yards, as the vermin all packed in for a chance to see Manny Ramirez's 500th homaaaahhh. And the high-fivin' one came through. One guy ...
From Cheerleader To Puck Bunny
NHL.com wises up, hires former Texans cheerleader to...something something cheerleader. [Japers' Rink]...
Julian Tavarez, Still Crazy, Still Losing Stuff
Next month, we'll be heading to Fenway Park to see our Cardinals play the Red Sox. We've been trying to calm our parents down; they're a little afraid Boston fans will come after them for wearing Cardinals garb. We don't think so. Cardinals fans and Red Sox fans have always gotten along well, thanks...
Innovative Uses Of Google Text Ads
Like every other human, we occasionally do google searches of our own name. Imagine our surprise when, this morning, we found this text ad....