x Page 682 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A-Rod Apologizes To Fans With Dopey Handwritten Letter
This is wonderful. Alex Rodriguez has released a handwritten(!) letter in which he apologizes to all of his fans for, uh, whatever it is we've all decided he needs to apologize for. This idea was surely thought up by some overpaid brand consultant. "Alex, our data shows that baseball fans associate ...
Doug Baldwin Reveals Football-Pooping Celebration Was For Darrelle Revis
Doug Baldwin commemorated his Super Bowl lead-extending touchdown catch by pretending either to poop out the football, or on it. (It's not clear which, but no one saw it anyway; NBC's director cut away in time, warned by the voice of his vigilant dead mother. Thankfully, it was filmed from the stand...
How To Clean Up Every Mess Depicted In <i>Fifty Shades of Grey</i>
Fifty Shades of Grey is not a good book. The story essentially boils down to two boring people engaged in a boring contract negotiation, punctuated by seemingly endless rounds of shower/bathtub sex and a few light spankings. It's really very, very dull stuff....
Train Horns That Keep Me And My Wife Awake At Night, Ranked
My wife and I recently moved to a house in the Dunbar/Spring neighborhood of Tucson, Ariz. Because we had never visited the house in the middle of the night, we didn't realize quite how loud the freight-train horns were. We have adjusted, in part with the help of earplugs. (To spoil another potentia...
After The Fall: Sympathy For The Devil
What do Dave Pell, Don Van Natta Jr, and Longform all have in common? They all singled out Brin-Jonathan Butler's stellar SB Nation Longform piece on Mike Tyson and Cus D'Amato:...
<i></i>French Soccer Fans Rep Their Club With Stunning Colored Dust Cloud
Hey, this is really cool. Girondins de Bordeaux hosted AS Saint-Étienne today, and Bordeaux's fans thought of a cool new way to support their squad: dust....
How To Cook Valentine's Day Dinner, Like You Damn Well Should
The first thing to know about cooking for Valentine's Day is that the list of occasion-appropriate food preparations you'll find below was made in consultation with a woman, the only blemish on whose otherwise immaculate record of good taste and judgment is her baffling and indefensible decision to ...
What The Hell Is FIFA Doing With The 2026 World Cup Media Rights?
Stop me if you've heard this one before, but FIFA has made a very strange decision, in secret, and at the moment the most compelling explanation for said decision is corruption....
Von Wafer Ejected From Chinese Basketball Game After Flying Dick-Punch
Shit got a little out of control during a first-round CBA playoff game between Qingdao and Shanxi, thanks in to small part to former NBA players Von Wafer and Jeremy Tyler....
Court Docs Allege Tony Bosch Spent MLB's Money On Strippers And Clubs
Two years after it was first broken, the Biogenesis saga in South Florida continues to reveal hilarious details about how Major League Baseball conducts business. The Miami New Times reports on the criminal case against Lazer Collazo, an associate of Biogenesis founder Tony Bosch, who is charged wit...
The Loopy <i>Project A</i> Is Jackie Chan At His Most Violently Ridiculous
There's a moment in the 1983 Jackie Chan movie Project A where he's dangling from a clock tower's minute hand, clinging for dear life as people watch him from stories below. Chan has always been a big silent-comedy head, and the scene was directly inspired by a famous stunt that Harold Lloyd pulle...
The Miseducation Of Deion Sanders
Deion Sanders knows better than most that there's power in a nickname. When he was still just a skinny cornerback at Florida State University, he dubbed himself "Prime Time" and birthed an alter ego that would earn him fame, riches, and a place in the pantheon of the 20th century's greatest athlet...
Buster Douglas Shocked The World, And Then He Got Fat And Happy
25 years ago today, Buster Douglas shocked the world and knocked out Mike Tyson, becoming the heavyweight champion of the world. This profile appeared in Sports Illustrated three years later, after Douglas had lost his title to Evander Holyfield. It has been reprinted here with the author's permis...
How Players Manage To Scalp Their Super Bowl Tickets
The MMQB's Robert Klemko has a great story about a ticket broker hustling his way through the crazy, somewhat-shady secondary ticket market that sprung up at this year's Super Bowl. There's a lot of good stuff in here, including an answer to the question we've all found ourselves asking: Do players ...
Screencap Classix: Lil Wayne Devastates Jay Mariotti On <i>ATH</i>
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The Phoenix Suns Have Lost An Awful Lot Of Games On Buzzer Beaters
The Phoenix Suns are humming along okay, barely ahead of New Orleans and Oklahoma City for the final playoff spot in the West. But they would be in a much better position if they hadn't gotten punched in the gut at the buzzer approximately a million times this season. A Blake Griffin three? An o...
An Exceedingly Polite Beginner's Guide To Anal Sex
Anal play, as you likely well know by now, is having its moment. Hell, even Vogue is writing about it, and Harvard is, like, teaching classes about the basics of butt-banging. But we can't all go to Harvard (and thank God for that), which means that the 101-type stuff that a lot of curious folks m...