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Your 100 Percent Bile-Filled Oscars Live Blog
It's finally here! Oscar Night! Speeches! Safe wardrobe choices! Four million references to "old Hollywood glamour"! Diet Pepsi commercials! Tap dance montages! THE WHOLE SHEBANG. I can't wait. I hope you've had as much Chardonnay as I've had, because I am feeling BITCHAY. ...

50 Cent's Attempt To Kiss Erin Andrews Was One For The Ages
In a sports moment rivaled only by Joe Namath's come-ons to Suzy Kolber, rapper 50 Cent—inexplicably making the infield rounds at the Daytona 500—took Fox's Erin Andrews to the Candy Shop of love, though it appears EA wasn't digging it so much. Before the race even started, we've had a massive wre...

Phoenix Suns Coach Lindsey Hunter Hates Michael Beasley, Life
Remember that time when Michael Beasley was single-handedly destroying the entire sport of basketball at Kansas State and was obviously going to be better than everyone in the NBA in like three years and probably the next Scottie Pippen, except better than him, too? Never happened....

Alex Rodriguez's True Yankee-Hood Up For Sale Monday Morning
Alex Rodriguez's 2009 World Series ring will go up for auction tomorrow morning with an initial price tag of $5,000, though Rodriguez is not selling it. Rather, his steroid-mule cousin, Yuri Sucart, sold the ring to an auctioneer for $5,000 and some think the ring could fetch as much as $40,000....

Here's A Picture Of Sylvester Stallone And Robert De Niro, In Full Makeup For A Boxing Movie, Hanging Out With Robin Lopez
And Xavier Henry, of course. I just wanted a punchier headline. (See what I did?)...

Rain, Trains, And Dead Kids: What To Put In Your Movie If You Want To Win An Oscar
Welcome to Dataspin, a weekly data visualization of whatever the fuck....

FIBA Is Prepared To Say D.C. High School Star Junior Etou Is 18 Years Old, Even Though FIBA Was Sure He's 20
Looks like an already-messy situation on the D.C. hoops scene is about to get messier. Junior Etou, a breakout star at Bishop O'Connell High School in Arlington, Va., is about to turn 18 all over again....

Burglars Steal $7,500 Worth Of Vintage Porn From Michigan Couple
Earlie Johnson spent years building his collection of rare pornography, which he claims featured every African American to ever appear in porn from 1970 onward and was worth $7,500. On Tuesday, Johnson and his fiancée, Angela Morton, came home to find that the entire collection had been stolen by b...

The 2013 Hater's Guide To The Oscars
Time to put on our bitchy pants and say shitty things about the Oscars and everyone nominated for the Oscars. Now, according to Entertainment Weekly, this year’s Oscars will be “song-and-dance heavy,” which is arguably the most terrifying thing I have ever read. The Grammys were two weeks ago. That ...

Sext-Happy Former Toledo Running Coach Denies Sex Harassment, Other Claims; Former Runners Say He's Lying
On Saturday, Kevin Hadsell, the former director of the University of Toledo's track and cross country programs, sat down with a local news station for his first interview since our story about his departure amid sexual harassment claims. He was by turns defiant and penitent. He cried some, too, as h...

Mike Tyson's Lawsuit Claims His Financial Advisor Embezzled Money From Him
Earlier this week, Mike Tyson canceled the remaining dates of his touring one-man show. You could assume (and still can) that lagging ticket sales played a role, but this might be bigger: Tyson is suing promoter Live Nation and its financial services firm, claiming his financial advisor embezzled mo...

Did Derrick Nix Smack Cody Zeller In The Nuts, Or Did Zeller Make Him Do It?
Senior Derrick Nix is Michigan State's team captain, but he's done some pretty uncaptain-like things. Like an offseason arrest for impaired driving and marijuana possession (the latter charge was dropped.) Like offering up bulletin board material when he called Victor Oladipo overrated. And then, t...

Adorable Creatures Playing Basketball, Ranked
1. Arthritic sea otter (above)...

A Strong Day For Oscar Pistorius's Defense, As Lead Investigator Struggles Under Cross-Examination
Today was the second day in Oscar Pistorius's bail hearing, and it started as a bit of a circus. Hundreds of media members and spectators were turned away from the courtroom (here's a 360-degree panorama that shows just how small it is), and a promised overflow room was not made ready—and some membe...

Tuesday Night Fights: Rodney Anonymous Examines A Redneck Double Feature Involving Brass Knuckles And Dumpsters
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: the since-removed "Crazy drunk redneck street fight with brass knuckles knockout" and "Redneck lady thrown in Dumpster." Tonight's commentator: occasional Deadspin cont...

How To Jerk Off In A War Zone: Servicemembers Weigh In
Last week, we published a military doctor's very useful field guide to masturbating while on active duty. Unsurprisingly, it elicited plenty of comment on the topic from experienced servicepeople, some of which we have collected for your enjoyment. Got anything to add? Leave a comment in the discus...

Dale Murphy Once Got A Lame Autograph From Richard Nixon
Yesterday, former Atlanta Braves star and beloved-by-the-internet old dude Dale Murphy decided to celebrate President's Day by showing his Twitter followers a picture of one of his prized pieces of memorabilia: a baseball with Richard Nixon's autograph on it. The autograph reads, "To Dale Murphy, f...

Is It Possible To <em>Accidentally</em> Break A Player's Jaw With A Two-Handed Stick Swing?
A major junior hockey disciplinarian is going to have to decide, after the QMJHL indefinitely suspended Moncton's Ross Johnston for this play. Johnston's stick struck Halifax's Brian Lovell in the face, breaking his jaw, and requiring surgery that will keep him out the rest of the season. But is i...

