x Page 870 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Shitting While Skydiving: A Physics Experiment
I apologize for not posting yesterday's Funbag on time. Due to various circumstances, you only get a half Funbag today, and I may have to work a limited schedule this month. But fear not: Everything will be back to normal soon. If by normal, you mean talking about hypothetical superpowers and poopin...

Everyone Trying To Undermine Bobby Valentine
Beyond Lester, Beckett and Buchholz, the Red Sox rotation was up in the air. Would it be Daniel Bard, once the closer-in-waiting, now being stretched out to be a starter? Alfredo Aceves, the Yankees cast-off who can start, relieve or close? A guy named Felix Doubront? This being the Red Sox, and thi...

We Asked A Pro Wrestler To Weigh In On This Ditch Fight With A Big-Time Flying Kick
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fight: "FIGHT like a BOSS ! Kampfsprung like a BOSS!" Tonight's commentator: Cory Kastle, a pro wrestler exploring his comedic chops during an extended hiatus from the ring on acco...

Here's What Kentucky's Championship Celebration Sounded Like Over The Lexington Police Scanner
If you weren't tuned in to the Lexington Police Department's radio scanner last night, you missed out on a wild world of sports celebrations that ranged from the violent to the perverse. (The #LexingtonPoliceScanner Twitter hashtag alone was trending worldwide, at one point.) We recorded the whole ...

30 Paragraphs About 30 MLB Teams From The Baseball Prospectus Crew
The following is excerpted from the team chapters and player profiles of the perpetually splendid Baseball Prospectus. You can buy the book now. Projected records via BP's playoff odds report. ...

Taco B.M. Monster Wins Name Of The Year
The votes are counted, the tallies tallied, and Dutch medical professional Taco B.M. Monster has been awarded the Name of the Year, beating out such luminaries as Commie Spead, Monsterville Horton IV, and Madz Negro. Next year's tournament starts "soonish." [NOTY]...

Here's A Bunch Of Bros Going Nuts Over The End Of WrestleMania
WrestleMania XXVIII was last night, and The Rock won, and some people were chair-throwingly excited....

The Jets Haven't Said No To <i>Hard Knocks</i>
First, let's temper our hopes and dreams: HBO hasn't asked the Jets to take part in the 2012 edition of Hard Knocks, the training camp reality show that introduced the world to Rex Ryan, the most interesting man in sports. But, and this should be front page news, Jets ownership didn't immediately ru...

Body Of Missing Ultrarunner Micah True Found In New Mexico Wildnerness
After going missing last Tuesday, searchers found the body of Micah True in New Mexico's Gila National Forest Saturday evening at around 6 p.m. True was featured in the book Born to Run about a reclusive Native American tribe, the Tarahumara, who "have practiced techniques that allow them to run hu...

It’s Always More Fun When When It’s Your Wife Vomiting
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

WrestleMania Betting Odds, And How To Gamble On Pro Wrestling
WrestleMania XXVIII will go down Sunday in Miami, and I'd like you to ask yourself some questions. Can the Undertaker extend his Wrestlemania record to 20-0? Will Chris Jericho or CM Punk get the better of what could be an all-time classic? Does the Rock still have what it takes to bring down John C...

ESPN Headline Writer Unintentionally Encapsulates Grant Hill's Career
To Hill, they're more vital than air and water. [ESPN.com, h/t Jimmy]...

Karen Sypher Wrote A Book About All The Times She Says Rick Pitino Raped Her
Karen Sypher's new book, Guilty Until Proven Innocent: "The Karen Sypher Story," might be the most perfectly planned bestseller: it was released this month, just in time for a deep run for Louisville, and it's got a ton of rape, just like The Kite Runner. ...

Rock Climbing Is So Easy A 22-Month-Old Girl In A Diaper Can Do It
Her toys are strategically placed on the wall, and damnit if she doesn't glide right on up there to get to every one of them. It's incredibly cute, and rather amazing. The video stops before we get to see how she gets down, but she probably just shits herself....
![Arrested Drunk Man Sings "Bohemian Rhapsody" In Its Entirety In Back Of Police Car [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Arrested Drunk Man Sings "Bohemian Rhapsody" In Its Entirety In Back Of Police Car [UPDATE]
Dude in the video above wasn't happy about being picked up by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police for being intoxicated. The best excuse he can muster is something about "brotherhood of men on the planet earth" before he segues right into singing Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody." In its entirety. He even...

Channing Frye Is The Latest Victim Of A Blake Griffin Monster Dunk
It's not quite what Blake Griffin did to Kendrick Perkins back in January, but that's only because Channing Frye politely gets out of the way once he realizes what's coming. Griffin only accentuates his point by stealing the ball on the Suns' next possession and dunking again....

Charles Barkley Dresses As A Woman For His Next Weight Watchers Commercial
Can't say we saw this one coming....

Sacramento Man Arrested For Jumping On Top Of Police Car Produces Spectacular Mugshot
Jesse James Thomas was wearing a sombrero and a boxing glove at the time of his arrest on suspicion of being drunk in public, but they don't appear in this mugshot. That would have gilded the lily. [Jalopnik, h/t Pat]...

Fox Considering Launching Its Own National Sports Network
After conquering most of the cable news market, Rupert Murdoch's News Corp. is now taking aim at the Worldwide Leader, and is in the process of launching their own 24-hour national sports network....

Remembering The Deal Of The Century: When Two Yankees Swapped Wives
Excerpted from Damn Yankees: Twenty-Four Major League Writers on the World's Most Loved (and Hated) Team, out on April 3....