x Page 874 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

David Ortiz, You Are NOT The Father
"According to a report in the Dominican newspaper Hoy by veteran baseball reporter Dionisio Soldevila, a DNA test showed that David Ortiz was not the father of a 17-year-old in the Dominican Republic. Ortiz was the subject of a paternity claim by a woman whom Ortiz said he had never met." [Boston He...

A Bowler Hat Makes You Look Like A Circumcised Penis, And Other Style Tips You Won't Find In <em>GQ</em>
GQ's resident style expert Glenn O'Brien gets some rather interesting questions every month from his readers. So we thought we would have our own Drew Magary (who is also a freelance contributor to GQ) answer some of those questions himself. All questions submitted to GQ's Style Guy are anonymous, b...

What If Dirk Nowitzki Was Missing A Chromosome And Lived In Phoenix?
Then he'd be like a lot of people living in Phoenix. (h/t Tom)...

Since Robin Ventura's Back In Baseball, The Rangers Will Stop Showing That Video Of Nolan Ryan Beating Him Up
Last year, Texas showed the famous 1993 brawl between the Rangers and White Sox before every single game. Maybe you think it's weird for a team to air highlights of their president and CEO, but then again your team's president and CEO has probably never pummeled a man. (Unless you're a Marlins fan...

David Beckham Has Beer Thrown At Him, Freaks Out, Sets Up Late Game-Tying Goal Anyway
L.A. Galaxy star and future action hero David Beckham found himself perturbed late in last night's CONCACAF Champions League tie at Rogers Centre when Toronto fans greeted him for a late corner kick with streamers and, eventually, a can of Heineken Alexander Keith's....

Hot On The Trail Of Twitter's DadBoner, The Internet's Greatest Mystery
Bold flavors. Power moves. Chest beefers. A thousand beers, you guys. If any of those references are familiar to you, then you're probably one of the over 52,000 people who follow the DadBoner Twitter feed, which is probably the best Twitter feed ever written by an imaginary middle-aged Michigan man...

If Mike Tyson Were President, He'd Put Pacquaio And Mayweather In Jail Until They Fight
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Keep in mind that as a convicted felon, Tyson cannot vote....

Jose Canseco Will Not Play In The Mexican League Because He Can't Pass A Drug Test
When he's not periodically melting down or being the huggiest person on Twitter, Jose Canseco still plays the occasional game of baseball. Last year he was player/coach of the independent Yuma Scorpions (a position not without its risks), and this year was to be a step up in the world: the Mexican L...

The Data Behind Yu Darvish's Brief But Devastating Debut
Texas Rangers hurler Yu Darvish made quite the spring training debut today against the San Diego Padres. (Of course, he cost the team more than $107 million, spent the last seven years pitching competitively in Japan, and these were the Padres, so you'd think he would do OK.) Still, thanks to some f...

The Guy From The Dropkick Murphys Would Like You To Know He Didn't Really Say Jonathan Papelbon Couldn't Use His Entrance Music
Yesterday, ESPN Music(?!) reported that Ken Casey, vocalist for the Dropkick Murphys, did not want Jonathan Papelbon using his old entrance song. That song, "I'm Shipping Up To Boston," is reserved for the Red Sox closer, Casey supposedly said, and now that Papelbon is in Philadelphia, he's no longe...

The "Scam Cup": How A Very American TV Event Gives U.S. Gymnasts A Leg Up On The Olympic Competition
If you listen to USA Gymnastics and NBC, it's one of the most important Olympic tune-ups. If you listen to the rest of the world, it's a glorified showcase for American athletes. So maybe it's fitting that the American Cup's highest-scoring female gymnast wasn't even entered in the competition. ...

So This Is What It Looks Like When Russian Prostitutes Fight In The Street
It is a sad day for all of humanity when трех проституток cannot resolve their grievances via non-violent means. As such, last week — or whenever this was filmed — cracked open a sad day for all of humanity....

42 "Pussy" Shots For £126! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Epic £203,948.80 Bar Tab From A Liverpool Nightclub
Where to begin with this epic bar tab (full version at the bottom)? It's so single-minded, so devoid of nuance. I hate it. When Petchesky first directed my attention to this abomination, which was posted a few places yesterday, I thought it could only belong to one man—Don Johnson, the "champagne ki...

The Dropkick Murphys Won't Let Jonathan Papelbon Use His Old Entrance Music (Update)
For the longest time (or at least since The Departed made it famous), Jonathan Papelbon has been entering to the bagpipes-and-guitars opening riff of the Dropkick Murphys' "I'm Shipping Up To Boston." It made sense. The song is instantly recognizable, catchy, and it's about Boston....

Wait, Chris Berman Gave How Much Money To Joe Lieberman?!
Your letters:...

Ronda Rousey Mangles Arms And Mean Mugs With The Best Of Them
If you only watched the main event of the Strikeforce event on Saturday, you would have seen judo Olympian Ronda Rousey turn Meisha Tate's arm into a bucatini noodle. But you might have missed Rousey scare the bejeezus out of Showtime host Heidi Androl before the fight. Look at that death stare. C...

Mike Tyson Has Finally Been Reduced To A (Possibly Naked) Vegas Lounge Act
I suppose this was inevitable. A great many infirm or destitute boxing champions wind up soft-shoeing in Las Vegas at some point. It is now Mike Tyson's turn. As reported elsewhere over the past few days, Tyson is getting ready to star in "Mike Tyson: Undisputed Truth—Live on Stage," a one-man one-w...

This Is Why Basketball Shorts Used To Have Belts
VCU's off to another fast start in tonight's CAA tournament championship game against Drexel, a team that's struggled to earn a reputation worthy of being included amongst Philadelphia's Big Five. But so far tonight, they look like they've been caught with their pants down—or at least the Dragons...

Red Sox Minor Leaguer Pete Ruiz Has His Own Tim Kurkjian Impression
It's more understated than Blue Jays catcher J.P. Arencibia's, we'll argue. Arencibia's is perhaps funnier—he brought Kurkjian's voice to a comically high pitch—but Ruiz's seems more precise. He's Darrell Hammond to Arencibia's Will Ferrell....

Inside The Spring Training Market For $4 Porn
Excerpted from former Padre and Blue Jay Dirk Hayhurst's splendid new book, Out of My League, a true chronicle of life as a pitcher bouncing between the minor leagues and the show. Some names have been changed....