yo Page 577 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Some Poor Bastard's Cell Phone Went Off During John Tortorella's Press Conference, And Torts Was Not Happy
John Tortorella's press conferences are the stuff of legend: tense, terse legend. At least from the media side, they're more amusing than hostile. But there's going to come a day when the Rangers aren't winning, and the scribes are going to refer to their mental tally of all the times Torts bullie...
Boston's Game Two Loss Left This Celtics Fan Looking For Something To Lick
The Sixers downed the Celtics 82-81 last night to even their Eastern Conference semifinal series at one-all, a result that got this Bostonian so hot and bothered he was reduced to panting....
Rex Ryan Is Not (As) Fat
That's him at a Jets charity function over the weekend. Holy shit....
Osi Umenyiora Wishes "Twitter Gangster" LeSean McCoy A Happy Mother's Day...On Twitter
So, yeah. Osi Umenyiora recently joined Twitter and it would appear he is a quick learner (except for the whole "@ reply" thing). Earlier this morning he tweeted "Happy Mothers Day Lesean Mccoy! Enjoy your special day!!"...
JaVale McGee Gave Us The Going-Away Present Of Trying To Dunk His Own Missed Free Throw
This season JaVale McGee did crazy things, lazy things, stupid things, and even awesome things. Last night in the final moments of the Nuggets' Game Seven loss to the Lakers, he gave us all a nice parting gift when he tried to dunk his own missed free throw....
Andy Pettitte Makes First Start Since Retiring Before The Original Roger Clemens Perjury Trial
Earlier in the week, Jon Heyman wrote something silly about Andy Pettitte not being trustworthy anymore because he said something potentially helpful for Roger Clemens, while being cross-examined by Roger Clemens's lawyer. Never mind that that is kind of the point of cross examination, but why not ...
If The Lakers Lose Tonight Mike Brown Will Be Out Of A Job, Says Lakers Vice President (Magic Johnson)
Last night, Magic Johnson had some relatively strong (hypothetical) words for the Lakers coach and key big men....
Christian School Forfeits State Championship Game Rather Than Compete Against Player Who Is Black*
An Arizona high school baseball team forfeited the state championship game Wednesday rather than face an opponent whose squad featured a black* player....
The USFL Is Making A Comeback, Will Be Nothing Like The Old USFL
The United States Football League is apparently being reborn next March, with teams in eight cities playing a 14-game schedule through June 2013. Not everything is cemented yet, including which cities will actually get franchises, but the effort has attracted some noteworthy investors and advisors, ...
Kenneth Faried Appeared To Be Broken After Being Flagrantly Fouled By Kobe Bryant
Kobe Bryant earned a flagrant foul call for this hit on the Nuggets' Kenneth Faried, a shot that—for a moment, at least—made some wonder if Faried would be able to return to the game....
It Was "Anal Kid Time" At Yankee Stadium Tonight
Reader Tommy went to tonight's Rays-Yanks game in the Bronx tonight, and noticed the captioning board was advertising a very strange event. If you ask me, they're making baseball stadiums way too kid-friendly these days....
Miami Heat Apologize For "Extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire
This is what happens when an otherwise personality-less P.A. announcer tries to show a bit of personality. The Miami Heat have now formally apologized for "extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire after his sixth foul last night....
Lifelong Yankees Fan Tim Tebow Will Rename His Dog "Bronx"
Tim Tebow's dog used to be named Bronco. In fact, that's been his name for the past year and a half, since Tebow got him. But now Tebow plays for the New York Jets, so his name is going to be changed to "Bronx," for reasons that aren't yet entirely clear. Is it football season yet?...
After Amar'e Stoudemire Fouled Out, He Was Gonna Help Shane Battier Up, But ... Nah
Last night, we showed you how the Heat's PA guy made a corny reference to Stoudemire being "extinguished from the game" when he fouled out. But this video shows you what happens at the end of that clip, when Amar'e decides to lend a helping hand before he doesn't....
The Heat PA Guy Announced Amar'e Stoudemire Fouling Out As "He Has Been Extinguished From The Game"
Ha! Ha! Get it? Because he severely injured his hand punching a fire extinguisher! You're winning friends the right way, Miami Heat. (We isolated the arena audio track so you can hear it more easily.) [TNT]...
CBC's Ron MacLean Attempts Tortured Comparison Of Hockey Players To 9/11 First Responders, Fails
CBC host Ron MacLean opened tonight's coverage of the Stanley Cup playoff Game Six bout between the Capitals and Rangers with an extended and tortuous metaphor claiming the players were "like firefighters, like police officers," and throwing in 9/11 references....
An Unassisted Triple Play Is So Easy A 6-Year-Old Can Do It
And to think, there's only been 15 of these in MLB history. Pffft....
Last Night JaVale McGee Did A Lot Of Great Things, At Least One Bad Thing, And A Very Strange Thing
The Denver Nuggets forced a Game Six in their series with the Lakers last night with a 109-99 win at Staples Center, and JaVale McGee played a big part in the team's success with 21 points, 14 rebounds, and a number of highlight reel plays you can view here....
Bristolmetrics: <em>SportsCenter</em> Said "Fire Extinguisher" More Times Than "Kobe Bryant" Last Week
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....
Mike Leach Appears To Have Autographed A Copy Of His Book With A "Craig James Killed Five Hookers" Reference
Washington State football head coach Mike Leach isn't just inspiring possible new Friday Night Lights movies, he's also playing along with Internet memes referencing the nemesis who probably got him fired from Texas Tech....