yo Page 672 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Update: ABC Lawyers Are Freaking Out Because <em>Lost</em> Call Sheet Has "Elements Of Truth"
Well that's unfortunate. I guess this call sheet a reader sent us actually contains spoilers or something. [Gawker]...
A Treasury Of Pee-Wee Football Players Knocking The Crap Out Of Each Other
The NFL Draft is tonight, and in honor of that most drawn-out of events, let's take a look at the hard-hitting players likely to be climbing Mel Kiper's Big Board in 2020....
Fat, Sweaty, Drunk Man Teaches You How NOT To Perform Standup
This six-minute clip, taken roughly seven years ago, represents my last performance as a stand up comedian. After watching for about five seconds, you will understand why....
New York Rangers Are Underage Drinkers, Hipster Scum
Sorry, Fauxhemian scum. Anyway, that's Brian Boyle and 20-year-old Michael Del Zotto hitting up a Boston College party after the MGMT concert. Nice Natty Ices, guys. [Watch The Gap Sports]...
BYU's Top Rusher Withdraws, Possibly Due To Premarital Sex With Girlfriend
Harvey Unga, BYU's leading rusher, is withdrawing from school. So is his girlfriend, basketball player Keilani Moeaki. They're leaving because of a violation of BYU's notoriously strict honor code. Let's speculate!...
Mistaken Bomb Threat Aimed At Yankee Fans
Metro-North Railroad meant to play a recording notifying passengers of train service to Yankee Stadium. They instead played a warning of a bomb threat. Hey, whatever helps explain those empty seats behind home plate. [StationStops via Couchwarmers]...
Absurdly Long Games Are Just The Greatest
The Mets' and Cardinals' 20-inning, 6-hour and 53-minute marathon was the most fascinating game we're likely to see all year. Let's do the post-mortem....
Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
Will Bulls-Cavs be half as good as Bulls-Celtics? Will the Atlanta Hawks learn to "Fear the Deer?" Can the Celtics shake off some half-season rust and stop Los Heat? Will the Nuggets rally in the name of their ailing coach?...
You're An Expert? NHL Playoffs Open Thread
Boston-Buffalo, Montreal-Washington, Los Angeles-Vancouver, Andy Sutton-Media. Discuss here....
Vince Young Maybe Has A Fender-Bender: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....
How Keith Hernandez Deals With Younger Women: "Sit And Stare"
Last night's Mets broadcast returned from break just in time to catch the punchline to 'ol Keith's story about a young lady. "I just had to sit down across from her, for around two minutes, and just stare at her."...
Last Night's Winner: Rule Breakers
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like underdog teams that aren't supposed to win on the road, but now have the advantage in the NHL Playoffs. F*@kin' upsets....how do they work?...
Reporter-Turned-Blogger Blasts Blogger-Turned-Reporter
This is William Houston, former Toronto Globe and Mail columnist. He was relevant, oh, around the last time the Maple Leafs were. He has some absurd things to say about the new Leafs beat writer....
LA Angels Witness NYC Suicide Jumper: "Weaver Actually Saw Him Splat"
That quote is from Angels' pitcher Matt Palmer, as he described how he and starter Jared Weaver were crossing the street when a 39-year-old man jumped off 42nd floor of Le Parker Meridien in Midtown this morning. [NYDN]...
Mysterious Laugher Does Not Sympathize With Chan Ho Park's Stomach Ailments (UPDATE)
Chan Ho Park recently gave his reason for being slightly worse than usual: a bout of diarrhea. This admission (repeated several times) drew gales of laughter (also repeated) from an unseen source. Who is this secret gut-bustee? A Parenthood fan? [ZonerSports.com]...
You Should Be Watching Hockey This Weekend, Seriously
Remember when everyone was so into hockey that time? Ha! But there's plenty to love: the NCAA championship, an NHL playoff berth battle, and oh yeah, some Slovenian hockey players who won their league title then beat up their coach!...
Traveling to Citi, Field of Broken Dreams
Do you remember these gals? If not, you should get to know them better. Sam and Susannah and the rest of Middlebrow Media will be helping us out from time to time. Today's topic: the delusion of Mets fans....
The Boston Red Sox Will Brand Your Baby
"Every baby" born at Boston's Beth Israel will be indoctrinated into Red Sox Nation, whether you like it or not. The "Red Sox Babies" package includes hat, tote, and a lifetime of insufferability. [Beth Israel, "Benbino" pic via]...
Baseball's New Lady Knuckleballer is Just Another 18-Year Old Girl Partying in Mexico
Two sentences from this article on US minor-league baseball's newest acquisition, Eri Yoshida: "She taught herself how to throw a knuckleball from watching a video of Tim Wakefield" and "The Outlaws open their season at Tijuana on May 21." [MLB.com]...
Life Is Full Of Choices: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....