yo Page 763 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pittsburgh vs. Jacksonville
Well that last game pretty much ripped my heart right out, but I don't think this one is capable of such damage. Regardless, there's money on the table and I'm already down, so my interest stoked. The Jaguars crossed Clemente Bridge for the second time in three weeks with enough confidence to take t...
Seattle vs. Washington: Second Half
image via Getty I hope you enjoyed that first half, because I sure as shit didn't. The Redskins punted the ball at a breakneck pace and once Seattle got on the board their offense began to slow down. Then at the very end of the half master timekeeper Mike Holmgren decided he didn't want to leave any...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while thinking about canceling that trip out to Torrey PInes...after the jump......
Seattle vs. Washington: First Half
Image via army.mil It's just about that time and my fingers are shaking from the anticipation... and the delirium tremens. The Seahawks and their alleged 12th Man have opened up Qwest field to the visiting Redskins and the kickoff of the 2008 NFLplayoffs are just moments away. I won't actually "liv...
Jenny Hendrix Loves Jags, Anal
The Jacksonville Jaguars have stormed into the playoffs with a bandwagon that has quickly filled near capacity. Well now they've got something even better going for them. When the Jags take on the Pittsburgh Steelers in the second game of today's wild card double header they'll have a porn star in t...
Today's Picto-Tube Schedule
Terrelle Pryor is one of the featured athletes on display in today's U.S. Army All-American Bowl at 1:00 pm on NBC. Continue after the jump for the rest of the day's best television offerings....
Welcome to Wild Card Weekend
Praise Jesus, Adonai, Allah, Buddha, Vishnu, Yaweh, Zeus, Odin, Bill Brasky, and their father, Tim Tebow. The NFL Playoffs arrive today and my preferred team will be kicking things off in about four hours. Seattle have the honor of hosting the early game and the weather is about what you'd expect. T...
NFL Wild Card Pants Party: Chargers Vs. Titans
Finally ... the game everyone can agree on, right? Blowout, yes? Vince Young crying on the sidelines while Merril Hoge cackles? Yes?...
NFL Wild Card Pants Party: Buccaneers Vs. Giants
We are incredibly pleased to live in a world in which this guy is facing off against this guy in an NFL playoff game....
NFL Wild Card Pants Party: Steelers Vs. Jaguars
Everybody loves the Jaguars all of a sudden. We dunno: If Big Ben stays off the bike, look out....
Kevin Youkilis' Slump Buster
You encourage Red Sox first baseman Kevin Youkilis to cash in on every endorsement opportunity he has; even in Boston, championships are a rare thing, and you gotta get yours while you can. Which is why we appreciate his new Slump Buster beverage....
NFL Wild Card Pants Party: Seahawks Vs. Redskins
All right, kids, the playoffs are beginning Saturday, so it's time to start sorting some of these wild-card matchups. We find one game compelling, two somewhat intriguing and one rather dull. This is in that middle category....
The Only Playoff Simulation That Matters
Above is the second half of the Giants-Buccaneers tilt; it's amazing how compelling watching the final seconds turns out to be. We are almost certain that will be more entertaining than the actual game....
Isiah Thomas Is Many Wonderful, Vibrant Shades Of Crazy
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, a copy of which I carry at all times, a delusion is defined as: "A false belief based on incorrect inference about external reality." There are three photos of Isiah Thomas next to the entry. Just prior to the Knicks' a 107-97 l...
Patriots Fans Are Deranged, Buxom
A lot of people say that they're Patriots' fans, but how many are willing to bare their breasts for the cause? (No, not you, sir; please sit down). Sorry if I'm late to the party with this, but I've only just heard of wannabe actress Cheryl Ling, who is better known as the topless Patriots superfan ...
Isiah Passes Grueling Two-Week Evaluation Of Self
Isiah Thomas gave himself two weeks to get his act together, or he would fire himself as coach of the New York Knicks. The two weeks were up on Tuesday, so what's the verdict? Although the Knicks finished 1-4 during that span — including four straight losses — Isiah happily announced on Tuesday that...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch on your free Green Bay Packers furniture (pending favorable Super Bowl result) ... • College football: Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl, Kentucky vs. Florida State, at Nashville (4 p.m. ET); Chick-fil-A Bowl, Clemson vs. Auburn, at Atlanta (7:30 p.m., ET). Guests of the Gaylord Hotels Mu...
About Last Night
What you missed while commemorating the 30th anniversary of Elvis' death ... • NFL: Thrilling Titans-Colts action starring Kerry Collins, plus gratuitous Craphonso Thorpe reference. Tennessee 16, Indianapolis 10. • NBA: Blazers, Celtics rule all, generously allow us to breath their air. • NHL: If yo...
The NFL Playoff Picture Explained
Country X is planning to attack country Y, and country Y is anticipating the attack. Country X can either attack by land or by sea. Country Y can either prepare for a land defense or a sea defense. If X launches an attack by sea and Y prepares a defense by sea the probability of a successf— BAH! I'm...