you Page 129 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Meet The Mets, Beat The Mets
A dastardly sot went after Mr. Met at a game last Saturday, the New York Post reports. So bound and determined was he to inflict pain on the mascot, he wasn't going to let children, or pregnant women or rare butterflies get in his way. Is hurting mascots all that fun? Seems like somebody has seen t...

Everything In Its Right Place
So, obviously the news of today was rather jarring for those of us currently employed at this fine establishment. Not surprising, but jarring, nonetheless....

What Can You Say Here Except, "Holy Crap"
The truce between cars and bicycles is an uneasy one at best, and is surely broken from time to time; but never more horrifically than seen here. And you are excused for that coffee spit-take. It happened outside of Monterrey, Mexico, near the U.S. border, on Sunday when a drunk driver apparently ...

Spend The Hereafter In Style Thanks To The Grand Prairie Airhogs
Being a San Francisco Giants fan, I often think of death; but so far I haven't made any firm arrangements. That could all change tomorrow when I head off to the Grand Prairie Airhogs game, where they are giving away a free funeral to one fortunate fan in their All Hogs Go To Heaven Funeral Giveaway....

Noun. 1.) A Generalized Loss Of Feeling In The Testicles 2.) Roger Clemens
With Erin Andrews frolicking around backstage, who could blame eventual grand champion of the spelling world Sameer Mishra to let loose a little Freudian slip? How else is he supposed to sublimate that sexual energy? Rub your finger on your hand any harder and it's playing with yourself....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while cowering from the New Jersey Ice Cream Wars ... • College softball: World Series, Game 5, at Oklahoma City (7 p.m.). There will be no carrying your opponent around the bases here. [ESPN2] • Golf: Champions Tour, Principal Charity Classic, first round, at West Des Moines (6:30 p.m...

Vince Young In Dire Need Of Media Training
Vince Young should probably just take a vow of silence or hire a full-time transcriber to follow him around when he's talking to the media, because it appears he's having trouble translating his own words. Last week, Young apparently told NFL.com writer Thomas George that he was considering retirem...

About Last Night
What you missed while visiting the no-longer-leaning Tower of Pisa ... • NBA: Due to some sort of mixup, Celtics and Pistons combine for more than 200 points. Boston 106, Detroit 102. • NHL: Penguin Lust ... they're going cracy for Crosby! Pittsburgh 3, Detroit 2. • MLB: Chase Utley commands the ele...

Vanessa Bryant Goes 'Susie Green' Once Again
Not to take sides on this Vanessa Bryant-Laura Lane cussing-out thing, but I've often imagined that living with Mrs. Bryant must be a lot like living with Susie Green from HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm. Of course you know that Bryant shrieked insults at ESPN's Lane following the Lakers' game on Friday,...

Vince Young Talks About His Rebound From NFL Joylessness
Well, Vince Young is having himself an active offseason so far. First, he had to explain himself and apologize for that shirtless night out with his Texas cronies and, now, he's admitting that the pressures of the NFL almost drove him to retire after his first season....

Vince Young Is Doing It For The Kids, You See
Well, this is exciting. Tennessee Titans quarterback and part-time shirtless dancing zombie has come out and apologized for those photos that popped up online last week. Young explained himself to the throngs of Tennessee media after practice on Thursday....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

About Last Night
What you missed while observing just another typical day in Arkansas ... • NBA: Tears on Bourbon Street as Spurs dump Hornets, 91-82, in Game 7, to earn date with Lakers. • NHL: Red Wings beat Stars 4-1 to advance to finals. Um, hey ... where's the riot? • MLB: Albert Pujols clouts two homers, puts ...

Hey Kids! It's ESPN Rise! (Kill Me Now)
Those old enough to remember the launch of Sports Illustrated For Kids know what fun is in store for America with ESPN's newest venture, ESPN Rise. It's ESPN's attempt to go after the high school demographic with content — including a magazine, programming events and even a presence on SportsCenter...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Ain't No Party Like A Vince Young Party
The shirtless drinking photos of Titans quarterback Vince Young have been circulating around the internet for the past 12 hours, with all sorts of questions as to what in the name of all that is Nelly is going on here. The photos, allegedly sent from a tipster who saw Young swigging and jigging at...

Ricky Williams' Presence Means Every Little Thing Gonna Be Alright
It's easy to forget that the Miami Dolphins will once again have Ricky Williams in the backfield in 2008, but he's received Bill Parcells' support (amazing) and is rehabbed and ready to go for next season. In an interview with the Austin American Statesman, we find out that Williams, at 31, is much ...

About Last Night
What you missed while plotting to catch the roadrunner in a perfect storm of ACME mayhem ... • MLB: The Adventures of Robinson Cano ... Yankees strike back, end Rays' win streak. • NBA: Kevin Garnett really does prefer those home uniforms. Celtics 96, Cavaliers 89. • NHL: Stars alive!...

ESPN Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......