Y'all take it easy now. This isn't Dallas, it's Nashville! They can't do this to us here in Nashville! Let's show them what we're made of. Come on everybody, sing! Somebody, sing!
Who do you think is running Congress? Farmers? Engineers? Teachers? Businessmen? No, my friends. Congress is run by lawyers. A lawyer is trained for two things — and two things only. To clarify: that's one. And to confuse: that's the other. He does whichever is to his client's advantage. Did you ever ask a lawyer the time of day? He told you how to make a watch, didn't he? Ever ask a lawyer how to get to Mr. Jones' house in the country? You got lost, didn't you? Congress is composed of five hundred and thirty-five individuals. Two hundred and eighty-eight are lawyers. And you wonder what's wrong in Congress. No wonder we often know how to make a watch, but we don't know the time of day.
If you're not twins, you're a trio, you're ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. Click here to find out how.
• Circuit City
• Fox Soccer Channel
• Ali G DVD
• Audi
• Depeche Mode
• Tom Waits
• Notes on a Scandal
• So Notorious
• Sprint
• Suretone
• VW Rabbit
• For Your Consideration
• Dewar's
• Mastercard
• SV Supreme Vodka
• Yahoo