Basketbawful has broken out the highest quality Wiccan spell components - coffin nails, dead sea salt, glory water, graveyard dirt, and a very phallic ritual candle - to uncover the darkest mysteries of tonight's NBA Finals (yes, Finals) game.
Finally...finally! It's been discussed in depth. It's been broken down. Now, at long last, the NBA Finals will begin tonight...after what feels like a three-month wait. Thanks for that, David Stern. I've almost forgotten what watching basketball feels like. And there's been so much rehashing of past Lakers-Celtics Finals - including my own Worst of Celtic-Lakers series - that last night I swear I saw Jerry West in my Fruity Pebbles this morning. (And I'm not even going to tell you who my poop looked like last night.) Enough is enough, already. Let's get this thing started.